More little life observations:

I hate the phrase “hive mind”. It makes you want to look for virtual bug spray for social media. It’s also code for too lazy to do a little research so why not just say that?

I mean seriously every time I see the the hive mind schtick used on Facebook – and it’s usually Facebook – it’s such a totally visceral cringe reaction. It’s like they can’t say what they’re doing, which is crowd sourcing. And sometimes people crowd source because they really don’t know, but more times than not, it’s just because they want to pick everyone else’s brains.

It’s like with the advent of the social media age intellectual curiosity has gone right out of the window.

Now onto the next little life observation….

I also dislike people who ONLY communicate when you have a potential use. This is why newer people in my life often don’t become long term friends.

And why do I say that? Simple. When your use is over, or you disagree with them, they are completely done with you. I understand that human beings have egos, but when you keep letting your ego get in the way, you will end up being a very lonely person.

I also dislike people who end up being the types whom only have anyone as a friend as long as people agree with them 100% all of the time.

It’s funny not funny, but actually a little sad that when I agreed with I guess a now former friend on things, they were so tremendously OK being my friend. As soon as I didn’t agree with them, it seems they have no time for me. And the ultimate irony is that they sought me out for friendship in the first place.

I saw something yesterday that made me think of a now seemingly former friend, so I texted them. I heard nothing back at all which is odd because this is a rather chatty person.

Then I went to look to send them a message this morning on Facebook messenger and realized I couldn’t because they had unfriended and blocked me and their spouse had also unfriended me. But I guess people who are friendly just to actually use them are of more use? Seriously, it’s tremendously disappointing and a little hurtful.

My most recent conversation wasn’t even a month ago, and it was not a bad conversation. But I wasn’t agreeing with them on everything so I guess given their exhibited patterns of behavior with other people I know I shouldn’t be surprised that this happened, yet I am. It was just a conversation, and I’m just not built to agree with everyone all of the time. I don’t think anyone is, realistically. Unless you are a Stepford Wife perhaps.

All these invitations for dinner and drinks with spouses that never materialized, which I never cared about. People’s lives are busy and I thought I had made or was making a new friend, and that was what was important.

I’m quite sure they will share the email around I sent to them essentially saying what I am writing right now, and I really don’t care. There is another person tied up in this who is like a dog who always carries a bone and they’re always really dumb about it like a drooling golden retriever puppy

So I guess I should say have a nice life to this person, and try not to burn too many more bridges. If this has all been some giant mistake, I am of course open to a conversation. But I think this is just their pattern of behavior. And that’s on them not on me, or anyone else.

But right now? I feel offended, hurt, and a little bit used.

Stupid me, but I actually thought that they were different than my initial gut check said and I feel foolish that I defended them to people who had well kind of warned me off of this person.

I have a clear conscience that I was a decent friend to them in the short time we were actually friends, but I’m half Italian and we remember these things. And it’s not about chewing on things not being able to let go, because I will – that’s why I’m writing this out now – it’s a case of remembering to trust your gut.

It’s also all about respect and loyalty. And being straight forward. I don’t let a lot of people in. I’m friendly and caring towards people because that’s in my nature but since I moved to Chester County as a middle-aged woman, I have learned this lesson a few times now that making friends as we age is not as simplistic as one would hope from when we were younger.

You always hope that when you’re meeting someone and you connect as friends that it will last. But sometimes it just doesn’t. And when people make you feel used, it really kind of sucks in the short term initially.

So I am putting this out into the universe and letting it go.

Humans are disappointing. I am sure I have disappointed my fair share of people over the course of 60 years, but at least try to learn from my mistakes.

And I’m going to hope that people learn to use a different phrase, other than “hive mind.”

Enjoy the sunshine.