Tag Archives: Shipley

the unsolved/botched philadelphia nonsense of it all: ellen greenberg’s family deserves justice and closure

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Screenshot of Ellen Greenberg’s mother holding her photo in the Hulu documentary series.

I will admit I didn’t really follow this case at all until recently. The case started during a time when I was starting my breast cancer journey and learning what life after breast cancer was like. So I remember the initial news reports, but given my life back then and what I didn’t track this and plenty of other news stories I am sure.

Let’s go back to the beginning:

Her name was Ellen Rae Greenberg (June 23, 1983 – January 26, 2011) and she died after sustaining 20 stab wounds in her Manayunk apartment in Venice Lofts.

Her fiancé at the time was a guy named Sam Goldberg. Apparently he called police after he broke the front door down and subsequently found her with a knife sticking out of her chest, but didn’t recognize a knife being in her chest at first, according to the new Hulu documentary which I just found freaking strange. These apartments aren’t that big and if you’re standing there at the entrance of an apartment kitchen and you’re looking at your fiancée literally slumped on the floor or whatever you’re not going to notice a knife sticking out of her chest at first?

https://www.courttv.com/news/medical-examiner-reverses-ruling-in-ellen-greenberg-case/

And they called it a suicide? How does one stab one’s self multiple times in the back and end up back down with a knife in the chest? And then there was this thing in the documentary where they said that some uncle of the fiancé Sam coming in and getting Ellen‘s electronic devices? So like her computer or tablet and phone? What was the condition of the items when police got them? How could they properly be examined after they took a detour and what is that term? Chain of custody? How was that observed exactly?

https://www.cnn.com/interactive/2024/12/us/ellen-greenberg-death-philadelphia-cec-cnnphotos/

Ellen and her parents were from the Harrisburg area. It seems that her parents now live in Florida. Her former fiancé whose full name seems to be Samuel Hankin Goldberg apparently hails from the Main Line. His parents seem to still live in the area. Ellen’s parents are Joshua and Sandra Greenberg.

I have been reading and digging into this since I watched the Hulu series. Suffice it to say when you think you have heard the last worst story about anything having to do with Philadelphia, never say never and watch the documentary series.

R. Seth Greenberg was District Attorney in Philadelphia at the time of Ellen’s death. Charles H. Ramsey was Police Chief.

It’s just insane. Why is Philadelphia stonewalling the Greenberg family?

This is a crazy rabbit hole to go down. And I never really went down it before. There are so many articles, but what I still don’t understand is how the ex-fiancé and his family for that matter just seemed to move on like Ellen Greenberg never existed? He reportedly is married and has a family, and his parents seem to still live in the greater Philadelphia area?

It sounds like Ellen Greenberg wanted to have a family too doesn’t it? Only she never did, did she? Her parents never saw her get married, did they? Her parents never held any of her grandchildren because they were never born because their daughter is dead, right?

People started sending Ellen links for me to post when I was posting about Anna Maciejewska. Every time I looked at anything I kept coming back to one thing: how did Philadelphia think this young woman stabbed herself so many times in the back and chest?

So reports at that time talking about Ellen leading up to her death, included people saying she was anxious and seeing a psychiatrist, right? Does that mean she killed herself? No, it doesn’t does it?

Screenshot off of Hulu series, episode 2

And another thing is supposedly she’d been home a while before she died? Why did she have like boots on? I mean I get that they look like UGG boots or something but they weren’t slippers, they were boots. It’s snowing like crazy, but when you are in your house do you wear boots? Maybe but maybe not?

And how is it that the police and everyone started treating this as a suicide immediately because if you watch the documentary and you read the articles it’s like as soon as they appeared on the scene, they decided what it was and how could they? And then lickity split within a few days it seems of her death the apartment/crime scene was scrubbed within an inch of its life? I realize everything is not like an episode of Law and Order or whatever but doesn’t that seem strange?

Now that I’ve gone down this rabbit hole I get why people have been sending me links all these years.

There’s nothing normal about this, including the fact, the way her fiancé‘s family as well as himself just seemed to move on, right? and he’s married with at least one child right if not more? Perhaps their relationship wasn’t headed down the aisle, but we will never know because Ellen can’t tell us.

So they always tell us that if something like this is a murder one of the suspects they always look at are people closest to the victim. In this case it would be like a domestic incident right? So it would be partner, fiancé husband, etc.

Yeah, it seems like before anyone knew what this was this was just categorized as a suicide and how do you kill yourself by stabbing yourself in the back like how do you reach? Was she like really flexible or something? And I still don’t understand how they let her devices be taken out of the apartment like that? Even if it was a suicide, shouldn’t they have been collected on the initial scene that evening and at least looked at by the police?

Other things I find interesting? The media reports Nancy Schwartzman who directed this documentary, went to Shipley. They also said Sam Goldberg the fiancée also went to Shipley. I guess life really is a small world isn’t it? I know neither of these individuals, we just have a school in common, many years apart. “Courage for the Deed, Grace for the Doing” is Shipley’s motto. It has nothing to do with anything or maybe it has something to do with everything? What do you think?

I just don’t understand any of this. Most of all I don’t understand why the City of Philadelphia never seems to really cooperative so what is being hidden and who is connected to whom? Is this about money, as in whomever has all the expensive toys wins, and no one ever really looks into this case again?

There is a Facebook page that has been up for years about this:

https://www.facebook.com/JusticeforEllen2019

Chester County even had access to this case for a while because they were supposed to be helping.

https://www.chesco.org/DocumentCenter/View/77835/2024_1108-News-Release-Update-to-Ellen-Greenberg-Investigation

People Magazine said the other day:

In February 2025, the Greenbergs celebrated a major legal victory when the city settled both suits and the Medical Examiner’s Office agreed to reopen its investigation into Greenberg’s cause of death.

This ruling came shortly after Dr. Osbourne signed an affidavit stating that her death should be classified as “something other than suicide,” according to NBC Philadelphia. He reportedly made the decision after reviewing new information in the case and consulting with a pediatric neuropathologist.

The settlement also included an undisclosed amount of money.

“I hope today we made Ellen proud of us, and we were certainly very proud of her as her parents,” Sandee told reporters. “It’s monumental; for 14 years we’ve been dealing with this suicidal label.”

I don’t know if we’re ever going to know the truth. I hope we will, but it just seems every twist and every turn with this case now that I finally have sat down and read enough articles to make my eyes bleed, you go like a step forward and then two steps back. People really don’t seem to want to have this case to be solved in Philadelphia, do they? In my opinion, that is profoundly disturbing and sad.

Ellen’s family deserves answers. Her ex fiancé’s family should want this issue put to bed once and for all shouldn’t they?

Well, I’m going to leave this here with all the miscellaneous I dug up.

Ellen deserves to have her spirit at rest and justice done. Her parents deserve peace and the respect of the City of Philadelphia and various departments to actually do their freaking jobs.

Thanks for stopping by.

New Documentary Explores Controversial Death of Philadelphia Jewish Woman

https://www.pacourts.us/assets/opinions/Commonwealth/out/1461CD21_9-13-23.pdf?cb=1

Click to access Philadelphia-Court-of-Common-Pleas-Ellen-Greenberg-Case.pdf

https://moviedelic.com/samuel-sam-goldberg/

https://www.nytimes.com/2014/01/12/fashion/weddings/caroline-shnay-samuel-goldberg.html

https://people.com/fiance-of-teacher-whose-2011-death-was-ruled-a-suicide-breaks-his-silence-8761666

https://www.soapcentral.com/shows/death-apartment-603-what-happened-ellen-greenberg-who-caroline-shnay-details-explored

https://variety.com/2025/tv/news/death-in-apartment-603-ellen-greenberg-suicide-hulu-1236530265/

https://www.phillyvoice.com/ellen-greenberg-documentary-abc-death-in-apartment-603/

https://www.crimescoop.org/news/ten-years-ago-ellen-greenberg-was-fatally-stabbed-20-times-10-times-in-the-back-of-the-neck-why-is-her-horrific-death-still-being-called-a-suicide

https://www.cnn.com/interactive/2024/12/us/ellen-greenberg-death-philadelphia-cec-cnnphotos/

https://littlesis.org/oligrapher/7919-josh-shapiro-conflict-of-interest-ellen-greenberg-murder

https://www.reddit.com/r/philly/s/p8SAvaDqws

https://www.the-independent.com/news/world/americas/crime/hulu-ellen-greenberg-suicide-murder-docuseries-b2836769.html

this is us….shipley class of 1981 on our 40th reunion

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Forty years. Seems inconceivable. And Shipley 1981 was several lifetimes ago for a lot of us. Yet here we are.

We have lost three members of our class far too young. Alison Sweet Zieff (2010), Amy Beth Rowan (2020), Pam Post (2021). I will admit I felt each loss rather acutely because these were all amazing women. My husband says we are at “that age”, my mother reminded me today that out of her tiny high school class (around 23) there are literally only of a couple of people still here, including her, so we are very fortunate. There were I believe 75 in our class on graduation day.

Some people have evaporated into their own lives and aren’t connected to any of us in the Class of 1981, but our class is still amazingly still connected, and connected to men and women in classes above us and below us.

Our commencement speaker was Vartan Gregorian. Yes, that amazing man was a friend and classmate Raffi’s father. Vartan Gregorian passed away earlier this month. Which made my friend Anthony (who has been my friend since grade school!) sending me a scan of our commencement program even more special and bittersweet.

One of the things we did excerpts from that I had forgotten at commencement was selections from Walt Whitman’s “Song of Myself”. Damned if I can remember which parts (it’s huge and sprawling as a literary work), so here is a quote:

Song of Myself, 1 [I Celebrate myself]
Walt Whitman – 1819-1892

I Celebrate myself, and sing myself,

And what I assume you shall assume,
For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.

I loafe and invite my soul,
I lean and loafe at my ease observing a spear of summer grass.

My tongue, every atom of my blood, form’d from this soil, this air,
Born here of parents born here from parents the same, and their parents the same,
I, now thirty-seven years old in perfect health begin,
Hoping to cease not till death.

Creeds and schools in abeyance,
Retiring back a while sufficed at what they are, but never forgotten,
I harbor for good or bad, I permit to speak at every hazard,
Nature without check with original energy.

Morning Has Broken was in the program as well, so here is a video:

Again…FORTY years? I still remember us, the way we were. And I have enjoyed every time we have gotten together for reunions. We have always had fun. Our friends in the Class of 1980 lost their reunion to COVID19 last year, and our reunion this year will be virtual. Some can’t make it, some won’t do zoom. But a bunch of us will be together after a fashion, and after the year plus of COVID19, I think this is important.

I am not going to pretend I am connected to our entire class, I never was when we were in high school. Like any other school there were groups and cliques. I kind of floated in between a few, but didn’t truly belong to any one group or clique in particular…mostly because I liked people from many groups. And I have never liked cliques which is kind of amusing as I was in a sorority in college.

This post / article is kind of like a love letter to my classmates and a school I loved very much back then, but not necessarily all throughout my life when I haven’t agreed with directions the school has taken. But that’s life, right?

I am grateful for the years I had there, and for my friends whom I still hold dear to this day. I am sorry we all can’t be together this reunion in person, but we will be together as we are able this time, and in the future we will be together in person once again.

I close with a snippet of this amazing video released by classmate Robb Armstrong (Syndicated Cartoonist of “Jump Start”, author, motivational speaker, all around good guy). Robb’s mother Dorothy Armstrong, was Shipley’s first black trustee. Sadly Robb and his family lost Dorothy to a horrible cancer 5 months after our graduation.

I will close with lyrics to a song that was sung when we were graduating. Not on graduation day, but at another ceremony involving our class:

From “Fame”: I Sing the Body Electric (Songwriters: Dean Pitchford / Michael Gore)

I sing the body electric
I celebrate the me yet come
I toast to my own reunion
When I become one with the sun
And I’ll look back on Venus
I’ll look back on Mars
And I’ll burn with the fire
Of ten million stars
And in time and in time
We will all be stars
I sing the body electric
I glory in the glow of rebirth
Creating my own tomorrow
When I shall embody the Earth
And I’ll serenade Venus
I’ll serenade Mars
And I’ll burn with the fire
Of ten million stars
And in time and in time
We will all be stars
Yeah (ooh)
Ooh, yeah
Yeah, yeah
We are the emperors now
And we are Czars
And in time and in time
We will all be stars
I sing the body electric
I celebrate the me yet come
I toast to my own reunion
(My own reunion)
When I become one with the sun
And I’ll look back on Venus (back on Venus)
I’ll look back on Mars (back on Mars)
And I’ll burn with the fire (burn with the fire)
Of ten million stars
And in time and in time (and in time)
And in time and in time (and in time)
And in time and in time (and in time)
We will all be stars

remembering chris thompson

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Chris Thompson. 2011.

Chris Thompson. 2011.

Today I have something sad to share.  Someone I know who was a friend who had moved away passed away suddenly from a heart attack in June, and I did not know until today.  His name was Chris Thompson.  I thought he deserved more than a paid obituary locally so I have decided to write something today. He was a really good guy and extraordinarily talented.

A lot of you would remember him as Christopher Arthur Thompson as the former Director of Land Preservation from 2006 to 2009 at the Willistown Conservation Trust.

Or simply as Chris Thompson who lived in Berwyn.  Or as in Chris Thompson who used to own a sustainable food business, a true farm to table venture called Panache Foods.

Celestial Blue by Chris Thompson. Photo courtesy of family.

Celestial Blue by Chris Thompson. Photo courtesy of family.

To me he was just Chris, father of Alexandra and Margaret.  He was the former husband of my dear high school friend Sandra Hitschler Thompson (also Shipley 1981).  He and Sandra had divorced after their move back to the Midwest around 2011, and at his death he was married to Jennifer Drackley Thompson. To all of them I send love and condolences. The dynamics of couples you know change over time, but that doesn’t mean you stop being their friends or thinking about people and remembering them fondly.  Such is how I feel about Chris.  He was just a good guy.

Writing about the death of someone you knew and liked is so darn difficult.  I liked Chris a great deal and his former wife and daughters will always be close to my heart.  When I heard about his passing I thought not only of his career in land stewardship and conservation, but his art.  Chris was an accomplished artist and his work hung all over the Midwest and East Coast.  His art was powerful and lyrical and always blew me away.

 

Violet Eclipse by Chris Thompson

Violet Eclipse by Chris Thompson. Photo courtesy of family.

Christopher Arthur Thompson, 56, late of Three Oaks, MI and formerly of Berwyn, PA Joliet, Ill., passed away suddenly on Friday, June 3, 2016.

Chris in his element, Photo courtesy of Chikaming Open Lands Conservancy

Chris in his element, Photo courtesy of Chikaming Open Lands Conservancy

Born January 27, 1960 in Joliet, he was the son of Arthur and Marilyn (Smith) Thompson. Surviving are his wife, Jennifer Thompson; two daughters, Alexandra and Margaret; his mother, Marilyn Thompson of Joliet, IL; two brothers, Jeff (Nancy) Thompson of Joliet, and David (Carla) Thompson of Coal City, IL; one sister, Marianne (Joe) Haake of Joliet; his former wife, Sandra Hitschler Thompson; and several nieces and nephews.

Chris was previously employed by Willistown Conservation Trust, and worked as Executive Director of the Chikaming Open Lands Conservancy in Sawyer, MI for the last five years. Chris Thompson joined Chikaming Open Lands in 2011 at the conclusion of a nationwide search for an executive director.

He was also the former owner of Panache Foods which was based in Berwyn, PA until a move back to the Midwest in 2011.

 

Panache Foods launch March 2010

Panache Foods launch March 2010

Panache Foods offered locally sourced local Chef prepared foods and offered CSA boxes seasonally.  Panache had partnered with Kimberton Whole Foods at the time and local Chefs like Chef Francis Pascal (Trzeciak) of the Birchrunville  Store Café and introduced me to my now friend Deb Street Davitt of MacDougall’s Irish Victory Cakes.  I had actually photographed the launch of this business at the time, and my friend Caroline O’Halloran wrote about it when she was with Main Line Media News.

I mention this business not to diminish any other aspects of my late friend’s career but because this business at the time was at the head of the class when it came to CSA and locally sourced food. The so called Locavore movement was just revving up in our area when this business began in my opinion.  There weren’t many businesses like this in existence if at all at the time. There were folks who were offering CSA shares, but not a direct to the consumer’s home business like this.  This wasn’t pizza delivery, it was much more and they offered catering connections and introductions as well. It is through Panache I also made the acquaintance of  the now very popular Chef Jennifer McCafferty, owner of JPM Catering in Ardmore, PA.

Panache Foods and Chris participating in Foodapalooza for First Friday Main Line in 2011

Panache Foods and Chris participating in Foodapalooza for First Friday Main Line in 2011

For 18 years while living in the Chicago area, Chris owned Event Management. He offered many jobs to local youth who helped him with the Food and Beverage at the Taste of Chicago. Those were challenging, but very fun times. That was part of the inspiration later in his life for Panache Foods.

He attended Joliet Catholic High School and received his undergraduate degree in Art and Anthropology, and Masters of Fine Arts degree from Northwestern University.

Chris, as I mentioned, was an accomplished artist. He was the recipient of the Scholastic Gold Key Award, a Scholastic National Gold Medal for painting, the Rotary International Scholarship for Art, the Ford Foundation Arts Fellowship, the Quita Brodhead Memorial Award from the Wayne Art Center, and the Squirrel Gallery Award of Excellence. Now as a related aside, the Squirrel Gallery was the brainchild of the late mother of my friend Averil Smith Barone (also an accomplished artist)  named Valerie Lamb Smith.

Chris Thompson in his role as Executive Director of the Chikaming Open Lands Conservancy in Sawyer, MI. Photo courtesy of Chikaming Open Lands Conservancy.

Chris Thompson in his role as Executive Director of the Chikaming Open Lands Conservancy in Sawyer, MI. Photo courtesy of Chikaming Open Lands Conservancy.

Chris will be remembered for his dedication to preserving the natural beauty of both Chester County and Southwest Michigan and his appreciation for the arts. He was a wonderful husband, father, son, brother, athlete and most of all friend. He loved life and was a warm and welcoming and inclusive person by nature. He was so truly multi-faceted that on some levels he could be considered a true Renaissance man.

Chris was also a Board member of  Michigan’s Heart of the Lakes Center for Land Conservation Policy.

Memorials in his name may be directed to the Chikaming Open Lands Conservancy. For information please call (815) 741-5500 or follow their donation and gift instructions on their website.

( related: ChrisThompson notification letter to supporters of COL )

Father, artist, husband, friend, conservationist. Chris Thompson was that and so much more.  He will be missed.  Rest in Peace, Chris.

Chris Thompson's cool vintage truck when he lived in Berwyn, PA

Chris Thompson’s cool vintage truck when he lived in Berwyn, PA

adult summer reading

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Yes, gardening magazines are always part of my summer reading and fall reading and my winter reading and my spring reading. But I’m not writing a post to tell you that you should be reading Fine Gardening Magazine, even if I do think it is the best gardening magazine out there today.

I am talking about a novel I just finished called Luckiest Girl Alive by Jessica Knoll.

I had heard buzz about it, and a lot of people have been reading it that I know from Shipley because it was written by a Shipley graduate and basically the school at the center of the book is a fictional private school very much like Shipley.  Reese Witherspoon has also optioned the movie rights. (She had Main Line experience when she came to Philadelphia to film a movie a few years ago and if I recall correctly she rented a house somewhere around Gladwyne and Haverford during filming, but I digress.)

If you grew up on the Main Line and/or went to one of the private schools you should really read this book. It’s fascinating, darkly accurate and darn fun to read.

It’s crime fiction but it’s not just that. It also is utterly spot on as to what life in a Main Line private school could be and was like— complete with the different tiers of kids and school social status.

Truthfully, for a debut novel it’s pretty powerful and yes can be quite dark. The depiction of the lunch room is also spot on.

The funny thing is that although I’ve heard a lot of Shipley graduates talking about this book I don’t remember seeing anything that the school put out. Maybe I missed it.

Main Line Today wrote about the book and I read the article after I finished the book. I always felt that the inspiration for the other fictional school in the novel was actually Villa Maria and I think I was right. Of course this makes me wonder that one of the many brief descriptions of teachers at the school is actually a teacher I remember and not particularly fondly. 

The descriptions of the area, down to pizza places are spot on. But I would expect no less of someone who grew up in the area. But what is most fascinating to me is how accurate and unabashed the author is about writing about growing up and going to school on the Main Line. And the types of parents she writes about, we all lived through.  

One of the sub- topics in her book, the reaction to new non-WASP kids at a school, resonated with me because I have a vowel on the end of my name. I also came to Shipley in the Upper School and wasn’t a lifer. Yes, I had some friends there going into the school as a new student,  but I still remember the new girl feeling and the pit in the bottom of my stomach which accompanied it.

The author also depicts the whole working in your twenties and the hoopla around weddings and the crossroads some found themselves in.

The book is a work of fiction but it is one of those books that will resonate with a lot of different people.

I will admit I have a thing about books and movies set in this area. That is what drew me to the book initially. What kept me is the main character. Sort of an anti-heroine but oddly real for a fictional character. I liked her and I loved the novel. Check the book out!

Thanks for stopping by.

main line mommy d.u.i…..again

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4955-scene1-Concours

Looks like a happy scene right?  Folks enjoying a day of great cars in a beautiful setting and being snapped for the society pages of Main Line Today Magazine.  Yes, this is the Radnor Hunt Concour D’Elegance circa 2010.

And then this news breaks:

Wynnewood woman charged in DUI crash, child and dogs were also in the car

Published: Wednesday, November 13, 2013   By Richard Ilgenfritz rilgenfritz@mainlinemedianews.com

mug shotLower Merion police say a woman was driving intoxicated with her 2-year-old child and two dogs when she crashed her car into a utility pole in the Bryn Mawr section of the township Friday.

As a result, the woman is facing numerous charges in connection with the case.

Grace Tuten, 32, of the 1000 block of Clover Hill Road in Wynnewood is facing charges of DUI, endangering the welfare of a child, reckless endangering another person, driving under a suspension, careless driving and related offenses….At police headquarters, Tuten recorded a blood alcohol level of .28, or more than three times the legal limit of .08.

Tuten’s 2-year-old son was a passenger in the car at the time of the crash, shortly after 8 p.m. He was found inside his child seat in the rear of the vehicle. The child was taken to Bryn Mawr Hospital for a precautionary evaluation. Two dogs were also found in the rear cargo area of the car.

The media reports indicate she crashed into a utility pole around Williamson Road and Morris Avenue in Bryn Mawr and kept driving even after that, hitting a mailbox and stuff in addition.  CBS 3 reports she was driving on a suspended license.  Grace Tuten appears to be pending her preliminary hearing as per the court dockets.

This accident which could have killed her, her small child, and two dogs occurred I would guesstimate less than a mile from the August DUI of Meredith Williams Earle that killed a florist delivery man in Bryn Mawr.  Meredith Williams-Earle goes to county court it looks like in early 2014. Williams-Earle’s attorney was in the newspaper in September saying his client should get her license back.

Here we have another sad state of affairs and the commonality is kind of eerie.  Both Main Line born and bred women and products of fine private schools and good colleges. Both married. Both have small children. Tuten is 32 and Williams-Earle is 30.

What has gone wrong here?  How do families not know if someone is having issues? Do that many people really in this day and age routinely drive around comfortably numb?  Where was Tuten coming from? It was 8 p.m. on a Friday so where was she coming from or going to and where was her husband? And who exactly let her get behind the wheel of a car?  With a blood alcohol level of 0.28 was she visibly intoxicated?  Who lets a young mother get into a car with her child and two dogs?

To me this is an alarming issue.  And with two to hit the news a couple months apart , I truly see this as an issue. But if we are honest, by varying degrees this is not a new issue. It’s just not one discussed in public as much as whispered down the lane.

These women like Grace Tuten need help and they need our compassion. I said that when I wrote the post titled “deadly decision”. I see another young mom in crisis here.

Who is listening to these women?  I wonder if these women had postpartum or other depression?  Or are they simply experiencing pressures of being a modern Main Line mommy?

Since I have moved to Chester County I have even encountered some similar mommies, closer to my own age.  One woman  in the Giant a few weeks ago literally reeked of alcohol when she passed me with her cart.  A friend said I should have called the police, but where was my proof?  I did not see her drink. We live in such a litigious society that can it be considered a real Catch 22.

Alcoholism is an awful disease.  I have friends who have been “in the program” for years.  Including now not so young moms. Some have been successful working their programs, others not so much.

I have no idea what was going on with this woman Grace Tuten but I do believe the pressures they experience as young moms and wives in an affluent area are very real.  And as a little girl, I remember the moms who were my mother’s generation who tippled.  One in the mid 1970s called her popping pills with a cocktail chaser a “mommy’s pick-me-up”.

Grace Tuten lives in Wynnewood but was in the Bryn Mawr close to Gladwyne area with her child and her dogs, so she was somewhere she knew people really well perhaps? Or at a local restaurant?

I don’t know the motive, don’t know the woman but I feel for her because as a friend of mine said today who is a mom who had postpartum that  she believes mothers just don’t intentionally put their kids in harm’s way. So I am going to stick with that.

The path to parenthood is not necessarily an easy one.  I know many women who didn’t make easy transitions from working girl to SAHM (Stay At Home Mom) or did the whole motherhood and career thing easily.

I can tell you as a stepmother in training to an awesome now teenager, I have not had it all come easily.  The love is there, but here I am in my late 40s becoming a parent for the first time.  It is hard work to be a parent. And while I have enjoyed my transition from a woman who worked her whole life to being in essence a mostly stay at home parent, it is not as easy as it sounds.  It sounds lovely, it is lovely, but it is a major life transition.  And wow can you feel guilty for keeping house which is a job in and of itself.

But with age comes life experience, so in some ways, I think it has been easier for me than some of the younger mothers.  With these younger women, they are not so many years removed from their single and young married party days.  Most of their Facebook pages tell that tale rather readily. So here they are in a fairy tale life to some that on the inside for whatever reason might not be such a fine fairy tale.  So do they drink socially and then it becomes drinking to take the edge off of the reality of life? Or do they just do the mommy pick me up to take the edge off and it gets out of hand?

I don’t really know.  All I know is this is yet another case of a well-educated, well-bred young woman ending up with a DUI with her child in the car.  I am hoping this is a topic that mom bloggers in the area will take up.  Why? Because I think there needs to be a conversation.

The pressure to be the perfect woman is a very real thing. And the sooner we, as women can learn to stop beating ourselves up for not being paragons of perfection, the better. And yes that is a lesson I also have to learn and accept. (Some days are just better than others and self-perception is a tricky and cheeky devil.)

I wish life and fixing life issues was as simple as Cher’s infamous line in “Moonstruck” – you know – “Snap out of it!” – but it’s not.  It takes work. Relationships take work, families take work.  Yes there is love and all the good stuff, but you get the good stuff by working together, don’t you?

So mom bloggers out there, I hope you will take the time to talk about this issue.  Not to be a salacious gossip, but to discuss how we can, as women, address this. And offer support but not enabling to those we might know who are in need.

This is just sad, and like I was sad for Meredith Williams-Earle, I am sad for Grace Tuten. So young to have screwed up so much. And the last thing to consider are the people who never think this will happen to them.  The “I’ll just have one drink” theory.

deadly decision (updated 6/4/15)

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 UPDATE 6/4/2015

No winners here. This young woman, now pregnant with another child has been sentenced to prison for the death she caused with the accident.  This is in published media reports, so it is public knowledge.  I hope this woman can get through this.  I still feel the same about her prior behavior, but there are no winners in this case. At least this time family members could be seen with her.

Here is the coverage:

Philadelphia Inquirer: Mother gets jail after deadly, drunken crash.
Laura McCrystal, Inquirer Staff Writer

Last updated: Wednesday, June 3, 2015, 1:08 AM
Posted: Tuesday, June 2, 2015, 4:18 PM

image: http://media.philly.com/images/Court2.JPG

Meredith Williams-Earle (in black and pink dress) leaving courtroom with her husband, Timothy Earle (left), and her attorney Christian Hoey. (Laura McCrystal/Staff)

 On the morning of Aug. 6, 2013, the Lower Merion mother took a prescription sedative, swigged champagne, and filled a plastic cup with whiskey as she headed out the door.

Then she strapped her 2-year-old son into his loosely fastened car seat in the back of her Toyota Prius and set out to drive him to day care. At Spring Mill Road and Morris Avenue in Bryn Mawr, Williams-Earle sped through a stop sign and slammed into a flower delivery van.

Its 72-year-old driver died at the scene.

FROM BEFORE:

meredith 3When Meredith Williams-Earle, a high school Latin teacher who lives in Bryn Mawr near Historic Harriton House, got into her car on August 6th, she was above the legal limit for alcohol and had Ativan (Lorazepam) in her system.  Not only that, but she had one of her children in the car.

What happened next, no one except her would know for sure, but media reports (based upon police reports) indicate mweshe blew threw a stop sign at Spring Mill Road and Morris Avenue and struck and killed an older man in a delivery van.   Main Line Media News reported she was going 42 miles per hour.

I know where those roads meet quite well.  I worked in one of the Tower Bridge Buildings in Conshohocken for a decade and that is how I traveled back and forth. I remember hearing about the accident on KYW News Radio in my car when I was buzzing around on August 6th and thinking “wow that sounds like it could be bad.” You see, initial radio reports were in the form of a traffic advisory, no mention of anything other than something like it being called a serious accident.

mwe4

I was also saddened to learn that not only was this 30 year old mother a meredith 2teacher, but a graduate of my alma mater The Shipley School as well (and no I have no clue who she is, and I do not believe she was even born when I graduated high school). So bright, a mom, lived in a nice area, so what went wrong? Because something did.

meredithI am asking because the media has been floating photos of her out on the Internet and well, there seems to have been a metamorphosis.  She went from being a pretty co-ed at UPenn and pretty young teacher to the mug shot above.  You don’t travel from point A to point C without a point B. (And I am sure some reader somewhere will roll up and give me grief about writing about this, unfortunately.)

Bryn Mawr woman charged with DUI in fatal crash that killed Conshohocken man

Published: Friday, August 30, 2013 By Linda Stein
lstein@mainlinemedianews.com

Meredith Williams-Earle, a high school Latin teacher who grew up in Bryn Mawr, was trembling as she sat next to her lawyers at a preliminary hearing Thursday related to an accident that took the life of a 72-year-old flower shop delivery driver.

Williams-Earle, 30, who teaches at Interboro High School, was driving a Toyota Prius with her 2-year-old son in a car seat when she allegedly ran a stop sign and struck a van at 10:28 a.m. on Aug. 6 at the corner of Spring Mill Road and Morris Avenue in the Bryn Mawr section of Lower Merion, according to the Montgomery County District Attorney’s Office……..Officers spoke to Williams-Earle at the scene and smelled alcohol. Her eyes were glassy and her speech slightly slurred, police said…..Later…Williams-Earle allegedly admitted to Officer John Kuvik that she had taken Ativan the night before and felt dizzy that morning, according to the criminal complaint. …..a friend told her that alcohol reverses the effect of that sedative so she had drunk some leftover Champagne, the complaint said….defense lawyer Joseph Hylan argued that his client had lived in Lower Merion her entire life, was a graduate of The Shipley School….She lives with her husband, mother and two young children, on the 700 block of Harriton Rd.

DSC00662Ativan and champagne are a heck of a combination.  And the drug is prescribed for anxiety, correct? So I have to ask in the pill happy nation in which we live, who was monitoring this young mom and for what? What she one of the millions of women detrimentally affected by depression after having children? Was something going on regarding the home front? This is a woman who doesn’t appear to have had many brushes with the law so to speak (although I did find record of a speeding ticket in Radnor Township in 2011.)

Also something that bothers me is she did the “perp walk” caught on camera alone.

Where is her familial support?  Wouldn’t you think a young mom like this would have had either her husband or mother there?   A friend? A grandparent, aunt, uncle, someone?  The media reports that she grew up in Bryn Mawr and lives in that house currently with her husband, mother, and little kids.

NBC10 Philadelphia: Teacher Charged in Deadly Drunk Driving Crash         

By     Lauren DiSanto    |  Friday, Aug 30, 2013  |  Updated 6:16 AM EDT

A Delaware County teacher is charged in a drunk driving crash that killed a 72-year-old Vietnam War veteran.

Meredith Williams-Earle, who teaches at the Interboro School District, was charged today with homicide by vehicle while driving under the influence, homicide by vehicle, driving under the influence and recklessly endangering another person.

My initial reaction was to write a much more harsh post.  I have a huge problem with drinking and driving.   There are just too many tragedies.

But as I have read and seen the media coverage and read the comments left by people on websites with articles on this, the conclusion I come to in my opinion, is this is a woman in crisis. And these charges she is facing unless a county judge grants leniency is up to 3 years in jail.

My instincts (and I do not know her or even of her), is this is a person who would not survive jail.  And what good is justice if it creates more motherless children?

I have to think that this is a woman who needed help but no one was listening, or listening closely enough.  How do you live in a house with someone (again media reports other adults in her household, a husband and mother) and not know someone is in trouble or self-medicating?

Ativan is a high potency drug often used as a sedative. It is also  is used in the short-term treatment of anxiety and insomnia.  There could be any number of reasons she took it.  She could have been prescribed it or someone stupidly could have just given her some to take the edge off. We live in a nation of extreme pharmacology and well, pills are the new jellybean at times I think.

Sedatives are things I find both serious and scary.  If she was taking this drug for whatever reason she should not have been in a car, let alone left alone with the potential for pulling a Karen Ann Quinlan by mixing hard core prescription drugs with alcohol. And whomever this “friend” was who suggested she mix Ativan with champagne is a huge loser.   A friend is the person who says if you are dizzy let’s get you to a doctor, not have a drink and you can get in the car.

This young woman faces a boatload of charges (see docket sheet) –  two counts of homicide by vehicle, three DUI counts, recklessly endangering another person, reckless driving, careless driving, failure to stop at a stop sign, speeding and improperly restraining a child.

This is what you call a real tragedy, boys and girls. A 72 year old man not wearing a seatbelt and everything that was going on with Meredith Williams-Earle.

Meredith Williams-Earle is a woman in crisis.  I don’t know why no one has addressed whatever is obviously going on with her, but I wish they would.  I do not think she is just some run of the mill gal who likes to play with drugs and alcohol.  I believe, right or wrong, that she needs serious help. And support from her family.  Because if she had help and more familial support or even familial awareness I am not sure she would have been behind the wheel the fateful day of August 6th, are you? But I wasn’t there, I don’t know, and can only guess and opine…as can all of us except immediate family.

There are no winners here, only quite a few take away lessons of life. This story makes me sad.

smooth and silky

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r1I went to Shipley.  My class had some amazingly talented people.  One of those is my friend Rhonda Dorsey who now lives in Switzerland.

Rhonda is a fabulous songstress and her voice is as beautiful as she is.  She is a contemporary R & B singer, and she released a CD a few months ago and I am ashamed to admit it took me until now to hear it all the way through.

As I sat here today editing photos for a new photo book, I popped Rhonda’s “Chocolate Sound” in and listened.

Wow.  The melodiously beautiful voice I remember as a teen is all grown up and full of promise.

With a velvety R & B meets modern jazzy sound with the occasional dose of funk, Rhonda starts off her CD with “Sums of One”  and rolls through “It’s All  Good Day”, sliding into songs like “Giving” (which is probably my favorite), or the sultry “I’ll Be” which is just simply lovely.  A funky beat draws you into “Let it Be Me”, a cautionary tale comprises the lyrics of “Mr. Le Le” , smooth and sexy is “Sense Me”, finishing up with the beautiful “Far from You”.

Rhonda’s voice is rich and playful, and literally as smooth as chocolate.

For those who don’t know me, you wouldn’t know that R&B is not something I listen to every day, and it’s not.  But Rhonda takes it places with her own spin, where I could.

Rhonda has a website and a Facebook page and a sampling of her style on you tube. Check her out and you can buy her sound on iTunes and Amazon as well as her website.

Brava Rhonda, Brava

maybe loch aerie is indeed chester county’s la ronda.

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This is in “City and Suburban Architecture” by Samuel Sloan, published in 1859 by Lippincott in Philadelphia. Sloan was partnered with Hutton when the house was built, but Hutton seems to get all the credit! The book is at the Athenaeum of Philadelphia

I am a lover of old houses and I love the quirky and fanciful.  But I had no idea that so many of you out there shared my fascination with Loch Aerie or the Lockwood Mansion in Frazer, PA.  When I said yesterday that Loch Aerie was like Bryn Mawr’s La Ronda was, well, hmmm maybe I am not so far off base?

It’s a shame that Loch Aerie isn’t loved and cared for like Granogue, Irenee Du Pont’s Estate in Delaware. Granogue is privately held and once upon a time Mr. Du Pont was kind enough to give me a tour, let me check out the green houses and the amazing view of the Brandywine Valley from a top the water tower.

Thanks to all of you yesterday, I learned who owns Loch Aerie — the Tabas family, and I discovered a tear sheet from what appears to be the realtor on the property on the Internet.  Unfortunately, it seems for these people, this magnificent home is just another steak on the grill.

The house was originally named Glen Loch, but when the Pennsylvania Railroad named its last Main Line station “Glen Loch” without asking permission first, William Lockwood the mansion’s owner changed the name of the estate to Loch Aerie.

I found this information in a book by Brian Butko called Lincoln Highway. Because of Mr. Butko’s book, I also learned that William Lockwood made the mistake of granting access to his springs to the railroad.  After all, the Pennsylvania Railroad needed water to power their steam locomotives.   Apparently Lockwood had to really go after the railroad and the legal battles depleted his fortunes, even as he prevailed in court against the railroad.  I find this part of the history fascinating because I think our railroads of today are lousy neighbors, and this shows that lack of consideration along this rail line in particular is historical.

William Lockwood had daughters who lived in Loch Aerie until 1967.  At that time Daniel Tabas, patriarch of the Tabas clan along the Main Line purchased the estate.

Now here is where I get confused.

Gretchen Metz of the Daily Local wrote in June 2010:

The Lockwood Mansion is going back on the market.

The seller, the Estate of Lockwood Mansion, a Tabas family trust, turned down the winning bid of $720,000 by a New York businessman.

Yet Brian Butko in his book Lincoln Highway says in 2002 (and I quote):

So that is most curious? Did the estate  ever leave the Tabas family after Daniel Tabas purchased the house?  I am sooo curious.  Thanks to The Library of Congress, we all have access to a Historic American Buildings Survey (mind you there are lots of other Chester County-centric stuff too.)  I found several copies on the Internet of the one in  particular about Loch Aerie to and will embed a copy below, but it appears to have been done in the 1950’s.  So maybe this Tony Alden did not actually own the house as was implied in Butko’s book?

Now take a minute and check out this article from 1992 from The Philadelphia Inquirer:

It’s Not The End Of The Line For This Landmark It Fell Into Disrepair. But Now Loch Aerie Has Been Lovingly Restored. 

 June 07, 1992|By Sharon O’Neal, INQUIRER CORRESPONDENT

Here again is where I find more curiosity: was this definitively designed by Addison Hutton as an original idea?  I ask because a friend from the Radnor Historical Society Greg Pritchard (he is one of my favorite people and helped me so much as I was going through the approval process to gain a PA historical marker for what once was The Wayne Natatorium)  sent me a message last night with a photo he took from a plate in a book that was published nine years before Loch Aerie was built.  The photo is above and the first one in this post.  It is a photo of a plate in a book titled “Rural Villa” and I can’t quite make out the name on the bottom right hand corner of the plate.  But that is Loch Aerie, is it not?  So was this drawing done for/by Addison Hutton before Lockwood commissioned his mansion, or was this drawing the inspiration for Hutton’s design? If it was inspiration, is there a Loch Aerie look-alike somewhere?

Around 1974, Elizabeth Biddle Yarnall wrote a biography on Addison Hutton (Addison Hutton, Quaker Architect 1834-1916).  On page 41, she writes of what appears to have been a visit to the home with her husband.  William Lockwood’s daughters were still living there.

Apparently, as per this book, Loch Aerie/Glen Loch/Lockwood Mansion was one of Hutton’s favorite commissions because it was an independent one.  I also learned thanks to Elizabeth Biddle Yarnall how William Lockwood made at least some of his money:  paper collars.  Mrs. Yarnall remarked upon her 1958 visit how intact the house still was at that time that it seemed that they “…had stepped into the Victorian world of Addison Hutton“.

Flash forward to 1995, and another Philadelphia Inquirer article about Loch Aerie.  The Philadelphia Inquirer used to do all sorts of cool pieces like this, but their issues and various changes of ownership means that not only don’t you see articles of interest like this very often, they also don’t seem to give the reporters the time or encouragement to write articles like this.  I find that a shame.  Anyway back to 1995:

Collections•Love Affair

A Battle Between House And Store Retailer’s Plan Is Too Close For Comfort.

December 10, 1995|By Susan Weidener, INQUIRER CORRESPONDENT

Ahhh what a tangled tale.  So with all due respect to the late Dan Tabas, if he had such a “love affair” with the house, why did it rot for many and have motorcycle gangs hanging out?  Why does it in essence sit and rot today?  Let’s get real, this was always a juicy plot of land.  Someone who has a love affair with a home like this, restores it, doesn’t sell off all the land around it to a big box store, effectively marooning it like a small desert island.  Someone with a love affair, restores it and moves his family in to enjoy the splendor and privilege of living in such a home. Or they find a suitable adaptive reuse. Yes, think Addison Hutton’s Beechwood on Shipley’s campus which the Committee to Save Beechwood saved – yes volunteers did that, not the school although the school reaps the ultimate benefit now.  Or up closer to Bryn Mawr Train Station (around 802 W. Montgomery).  That is also an Addison Hutton designed home, and if memory serves it could have been the house Hutton built for his family.  In any event, this property was recently converted to condos.  Mind you, I will never be a condo girl, but in this case, it provided a viable adaptive reuse that saved the structure.

I also love how Home Depot described their store design as “more characteristic of the Main Line.”   And then they woke up.  I have been to that Home Depot several times, and Ardrossan it ain’t.  Not even close.  It is what it is: a big box with concrete floors.

Of course I wonder given another article unearthed from the Philadelphia Inquirer if East Whiteland could have said no?  According to this article, not only was the sale of the property on which Home Depot now sits contingent on this approval, Home Depot went to this  “township to amend its zoning ordinance and create a special classification for retail and home and garden center use.”  This article also says how the reason Home Depot wanted to big box in was traffic from the Exton Bypass on Route 202.

That just kills me.  Big boxes might have their uses but not only do they slowly starve out independent businesses, the big boxification and strip mallification of Chester County is something which astounds me.   So many Chester County municipalities seem to an outsider completely thoughtless when it comes to preservation and the future.   All these plastic mushroom house developments, and countless big boxes and sub par strip malls, not all of which have full occupancy.  Look at what has been built over the past 25 years or so.  Is any of it spectacular? No.

I don’t get why Chester County doesn’t have a more cohesive plan for commercial development county-wide, and it is obvious in some of these municipalities that they see the short-term salivation over ratables, and not much else.  Of course if you ever watch any public meetings, eleted and planning officials love to fall on the sword of Pennsylvania Municipalities Planning Code which in my humble opinion needs an updating.  Suburbs and exurbs are vastly different and Pennsylvania needs better comprehensive planning, so that  many local municipalities run out of excuses on why they don’t need better planning.  Not all local municipalities are horible at historic preservation, but a lot of them could do much better, or simply pay less lip service to the idea of preservation and employ more doing.

I also think that Pennsylvania as a state needs to have more that means more in the area of historic preservation.  People need incentive to preserve, and I wish that Pennsylvania would follow the lead of other states in this country who offer more enticing incentives to preserve historic structures.

Now the Pennsylvania Historical and Museum Commission administers the federal rehabilitation investment tax credits , but it just seems a lot of other states simply do more.  At a minimum the Municipalities Planning Code needs to be more in sync with historic preservation in a top down approach in Pennsylvania.  Of course that opens other cans of worms as Pennsylvania is most definitely a private property rights state.  We all learned that lesson again when it can to La Ronda.  La Ronda was demolished I think as much as anything else because the owner could demolish it.

It is a crying shame that Loch Aerie has never made it to The National Trust for Historic Preservation.  I wish in addition that preservationists in Pennsylvania and Chester County would take an interest in preserving this La Ronda of Chester County.  No, we can’t save every old house, but once in a while it would be nice if some of the more important homes, of which this mansion is definitely one, were not left to rot.  We are in a crappy economy no doubt, but still so much our past in our communities is left to rot.  There seems to be plenty of money to build new, but not much money or incentive to preserve.  Private property rights state or not, once the architectural history is gone, it’s gone and not coming back.

What kind of adaptive reuse do you think could fit Loch Aerie?  I would like to see something that preserved the exterior and enough of the interior.  It would make a cool B&B or boutique hotel.  Even a restaurant.  Or a quirky office space.  Antique store or art center.  The landscaping would be key as it’s views are now either highway or big box.  Given how it was cut off, it wouldn’t make an ideal single family home.  If I were an official in East Whiteland, I would be looking for a way to make preservation of Loch Aerie happen.  But we all know the reality of that as it is far simpler to approve a demolition plan and look the other way.  Or to let many old structures rot and look the other way until no one wants the properties except for another doofy strip mall, drive thru pharmacy, bank branch, or fast food restaurant.

One last question.  Has this home ever been on a Chester County Day Tour?   There certainly are enough cool Victorians in Chester County that they could do an entire Victorian Day, or given all the historic homes at risk ALL over, they could do an “at risk” themed tour.  I love my barns, don’t misunderstand me, but there are a lot of cool houses in Chester County that are in desperate need of rescuing from various points of time in history.

Here are the documents I loaded on SCRIBD and also check out The Tredyffrin Easttown Historical Society’s Historical Quarterly Digital Archives “A Brief Glimpse of East Whiteland“:

Just a little end note added courtesy of a reader.  They suggest all get familiar with Landscapes2: bringing growth and preservation together for Chester County.   In their call to action this website says (and I quote):

Chester County is at a critical point in its history. We must make a choice for our future.  We can let the unsustainable development pattern of the past continue, or we can  choose to work together toward a new pattern of development that preserves the  unique character of Chester County.

Chapter 1 of the comprehensive policy plan, Landscapes2, outlines how the Board of County Commissioners and the Chester County Planning Commission plan to address growth management and preservation strategies in collaboration with public, private and corporate citizens.

There is also a section on historic resources.

Thank you one and all for your continued interest in this blog.