the mini-tree of it all!

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I make no secret of my love of Christmas and vintage ornaments. Today I completed my six mini-trees and have them scattered about the house. I thought I would share two of the trees with you.

Why have a plebeian elf on a shelf when you can decorate mini-trees?

Please note the largest mini-tree is like 2 feet tall. They all feature ornaments I had either previously collected, found at the Smithfield Barn and other places this year, and a few from my father.

Surprisingly it took hours to get these little trees decked out appropriately…but I had so much fun!

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so I made a wreath…

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It’s December! Christmas decorations can make their 2013 Christmas season debut!

I made a wreath yesterday.

Including the wreath form it cost me $6.51.

How?

Gently used and vintage Christmas decorations is how.

Yesterday I made a stop at Resellers Consignment Gallery on Route 30 in Frazer. In the front of the store as you walk in there is a jumble of gently and not so gently used Christmas decorations . These decorations include ornaments, ribbon, pinecones, wreath fixings, you name it. You have to dig through, and I hope you’ll dig gently if you go, so you don’t break things for the next person.

Hanging up throughout the store you will notice, much as is the case at places like the Smithfield Barn in Downingtown, there are also artificial Christmas wreaths galore. The wreath I found (plain and unadorned) was 25% off, and if you’re in the market for an artificial tree, they are loaded with them at Resellers – big trees, not the table-top variety.

Everything that went on my wreath except for the florist wire, came from Resellers yesterday. And yes, everything cost me $6.51. I also believe that I could make a wreath for just about the same amount if not less from fixings at the Smithfield Barn.

My point is simple: you can decorate for Christmas on a budget. There are enough people in this world that jettison Christmas decorations on a regular basis, that if you look at places like Resellers, Smithfield barn, thrift shops, church sales, and so on you can find pretty much everything you need.

The only thing I do not buy it any of these places are used or vintage lights. I am not an electrician, so I have no clue what is in good condition or not.

Decorating for Christmas just puts you in the mood to get a little holiday spirit. And yes, I have inside wreaths and outside wreaths and I don’t do it all every year, I tend to rotate my ornaments and decorations.

If you put your Christmas decorations away carefully, they can and do last. I put artificial and pinecone wreaths on hangers in my attic covered with big clear trash bags. If it is a year where I am making a natural wreath out of fresh greenery, I removed the ribbons and decorations that can be salvaged at the end of Christmas and put them away as well.

I am a fumble fingers with a hot glue gun, so the only thing that go on my wreaths are things that I can wire on with florist wire.

I don’t want to put specialty stores or craft stores out of business, but there are a lot of Christmas decorations that you can source quite reasonably and a gently used or vintage condition.

I like to do what I consider tasteful decorating for Christmas. I don’t do a million lights and inflatable things on the front lawn. I mean no disrespect to those who chose to do this Griswold Family Christmas style of decorating, but truly I do not need my decorations to be able to be seen from space!

Fun fact: I had an uncle that when I was a child that used to go to little overboard with Christmas decorations, including music being piped from the roof. Loudly. And this was before National Lampoon and Chevy Chase made overboard Christmas decorating so infamous.

You won’t find anything adorned in my home before December. Some years I get things up early in December, other years it’s a couple weeks into the month before I begin.

I also really try hard not to overwhelm my rooms. I look at it the way Coco Chanel looked at jewelry: she had a famous quote about taking one piece of jewelry off after you are dressed and about to walk out the door.

Have any of you begun decorating? What is your favorite thing to do?

Also if any of you know of any church sales or fleamarkets or Christmas festivals coming up with a gently used Christmas ornaments and other holiday things for sale, feel free to leave a comment.

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mmmm mexican food at home!

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My Chicken Enchiladas:

Two full boneless skinless chicken breasts cut into small chunks.

(Two full boneless breasts weigh about a pound – I buy the family packs at the grocery store and plunk them two at a time in quart freezer bags)

Goya Tomato Sofrito

El Pato Mexican hot style tomato sauce (7 3/4 oz can)

La Morena sliced red jalapeños in Morena sauce (7 oz can)

Can of refried beans- either red pinto or black beans

Soft fajita sized white flour tortillas

Crema Mexicano ( Mexican sour cream)

One bunch fresh cilantro

One lime

Goya adobo spice mix

New Mexico Style Chili Powder

Smoked Spanish paprika

Salt, pepper, garlic powder, oregano

Shredded Quesos La Ricura

La Costena Taquiera Salsa Hot

La Costena Green Mexican Salsa Verde

One Vidalia or sweet onion cut into thin slices, then cut slices in half

Olive oil

Cut the raw chicken into small chunks. Place in a large sauté pan that has had some olive oil in the bottom warming. Just a few tablespoons of olive oil. Dust the chicken with Goya Adobo seasoning to taste, a few dashes of garlic powder, a few dashes of oregano, and about a teaspoon and a half of smoked paprika.

Add in your onion slices and about a third of a cup of Goya Tomato Softito. Add a couple of dashes of New Mexico style chili powder. (you can order that from Whole Spice in California on Amazon).

Cook the onion and chicken down on a medium to low heat until you can basically shred the chicken and the onion is starting to almost dissolve it’s so soft. Turn off the heat and to that at the zest of one lime and the juice of one lime and as much fresh chopped cilantro as you want. Adjust with salt and pepper if needed.

Set aside and let the flavors meld together for about 45 minutes on the stove with no heat under it.

Heat up your can of refried beans over low heat in a small sauce pan with a little of olive oil in the bottom to keep the beans from sticking. To the beans add a little dash of the Goya Adobo Seasoning (I buy the real Mexican refried beans from my local Latino market), and add about 1/3 of a can of the pickled red jalapeños mentioned in the ingredients minced up and the Morena sauce it came in. Stir it up well, add a little fresh cilantro, and once the beans are heated through turn the stove off under this pot as well.

Go do something else for 45 minutes total for both. Set the table, clean up your prep with the chicken, empty the dishwasher, whatever.

After you have let the sauté pan and the sauce pan and the various contents set, come back to your kitchen and preheat your oven to 345°.

Line a baking pan that you would use for a sheet cake or brownies with aluminum foil. The pan I use is actually a vintage aluminum rectangular pan came from the kitchen supply house.

Take out six flour tortillas and one at a time first on the bottom of the tortilla layer refried bean mixture, and then put the chicken and onion mixture on top of that. Add a little shredded queso and roll your tortilla into a tube.

Repeat this six times. I made six enchiladas from this recipe.

When you have the tortillas now enchiladas with all their stuffing rolled up like little tubes and lined up next to each other in the foil lined pan like neat little soldiers you’re almost ready to put in the oven.

Take your can of spicy Mexican tomato sauce and pour evenly over your enchiladas. Generously layer shredded Queso to taste over the sauce and enchiladas. Cover your pan tightly with aluminum foil and put in your preheated oven for 25 to 30 minutes. Everything is already cooked, so it truly just needs to heat through and melt. But you must do this with a pan that is covered with aluminum foil or the enchiladas will dry out.

When you bring them out of the oven let them sit for a couple of minutes before you take the foil top off.

Serve the enchiladas with Mexican sour cream,chopped fresh cilantro, a salsa Verde, and a spicy red salsa. I suggest the brand I list above specifically in the ingredients.

There are no leftovers when I make this. Ever.

And FYI if you are in Chester County and reading this recipe, I use the little Mexican market at the bottom of where Route 352 meets Route 30 in Frazer. They have a small Taquiera attached called El Jalapeño .

This little market has several kinds of Latin American sour cream, Quesos and so on. They basically so all the supplies the grocery store should if you want to do a Latin inspired meal but don’t.

I was told I had to write down this recipe, so I have. It is something that started in my head as I scanned the shelves of this little market. I also do this with leftover pork roast instead of chicken.

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ho, ho, ho! vintage holiday barn sale and a blog holiday rule!

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Ho, ho, ho! I spent part of the afternoon previewing the Vintage Holiday Barn Sale at Smithfield Barn in Downingtown! I had to drop off some bits of my former vintage Christmases past to make room for the new vintage fun I have found. And yes, I had to pick up a small (emphasis on small) box of Christmas treasures.

Kristin has decked the barn and it is loaded to the gills, including yes, more vintage ornaments, some interesting furniture and stuff needing a little elbow grease and imagination, a couple of sets of really neat china PLUS all the normal cool vintage country finds like a retro 50s or 50s dinette set with chairs in pretty fabulous condition.

The Smithfield Barn asked me to pass along the following message about the weekend:

Hello! Just a quick note that the barn will be open this Friday Saturday and Sunday from 10-4. The barn is full of all kinds of treasures with a whole lot of vintage holiday items mixed in! Hope to see you!

Smithfield Barn 425 Little Conestoga Rd.

I am going to share a little more from me to all of you : Drive and park considerately when you go, there are neighbors. Also cash and carry unless you arrange something else. A lot of people have been a little inconsiderate of late and it’s not fair to prey on the good nature of small business owners and not follow through with intended purchases, or leaving items sitting for weeks. I have a lot of friends were small-business owners, so I’m very sensitive to how much work they put into their businesses and what they need to do to keep it going.

The barn is full of fabulous ideas. So if you like Clover Market or Brooklyn Flea or Brimfield Antiques Show, this is why you go to the barn. And truthfully, in case you haven’t figured out what I’ve been trying to tell you for a while, this is where dealers shop: the Smithfield Barn. Truthfully, some weeks this place deserves to go on American Pickers!

Now for the blog rule.

The holiday season is nigh, and we all have no problem calling Thanksgiving Thanksgiving and wishing people Happy Thanksgiving. But after that Thursday tales of the politically correct take over.

The things I wonder about include “Black Friday”. Think about it for a minute. We are so dependent upon the political correctness police in this country, that I am surprised that someone hasn’t said it’s politically incorrect to still call it “Black Friday”.

I guess and what comes after Black Friday? What do you wish people as it gets closer to December 25, right?

In my neighborhood we call it Christmas. I celebrate Christmas, my family celebrates Christmas.

Meaning no disrespect anybody that celebrates something else, but I do not believe in the whitewashing of the holiday spirit known as Christmas wishes.

So I won’t be happy holidaying anyone. I’m sorry but I wish people Merry Christmas. And I will do so even on this blog.

So as Christmas gets into the air and into your hearts, I hope you’ll pay the Christmas spirit forward and wish people “Merry Christmas”.

In the meantime, avoid all bah humbug moments and get a start on your shopping and decorating season and check out Smithfield Barn and their vintage holiday sale this weekend. After this weekend, the barn might not be open for a while. This is not an all weather, year round proposition, after all. I am going to make a suggestion for you nouveau pickers: bring a small pocket flashlight with you. It makes it easier to peer into dark corners. You would be surprised how much you miss if you don’t do this.

See you out at the barn!

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caffeinated heaven: hiline coffee nyc rolls out MORE fun!

photo1I believe in living life caffeinated.  I love coffee and have a definite attachment to my French Press and Nespresso machine.

Although I love my Nespresso machine I am less than enchanted with Nespresso capsule prices.  Which is why a few months ago I ordered from HiLine Coffee for the first time. And I just keep going back for more.

Why?  Good, small batch coffee.  And the guys that started this company went to Penn.  So there is that Philadelphia-area connection too!

Like myself, these fine gents (Ted and Gene) eventually discovered Nespresso machines.  Like me they found the capsule price points a source of irritation.  So these enterprising guys decided to build a better bread box….err coffee capsule.

Voila!  HiLine Coffee was born!

coffeeThe prices on the capsules are so reasonable and the coffee is amazing.  I just received my box of new flavors and I am like a kid in the proverbial candy store.

Their new collection is named after different parts of New York City, so how fun is that?  I had Wall Street Dark Roast today and it is strong and bold, but has no burnt taste like many dark roast coffees can have.  Next up to try is the Chelsea Light Brown Roast.

Seriously, give this company a try. If you love coffee, and own a Nespresso machine, this company gives you more choices.  I will *note* that there are other companies introducing Nespresso compatible capsules but HiLine  does the best job price-wise and with being truly Nespresso machine compatible.

I have tested other capsules and they are too small, and the capsules just don’t dispense coffee correctly.  HiLine has spent the time to really do a good job. So if you want coffee that is so good you wonder if you are sitting at Bubby’s in Tribeca for brunch or want espresso good enough to make you wish you were sitting in Café Reggio in Greenwich Village, then this is your company. And they have excellent customer service, so no Soup Nazis there!

HiLine can be found on the web on Facebook, their own website, and on Twitter at @HiLineCoffee .

Tell them you heard about their product on Chester County Ramblings.  Follow them on Facebook and Twitter for the occasional money-saving secret code!

Please note in spite of what the Diva of Domesticity known as Martha Stewart says, I am as a blogger qualified to review coffee capsules.  No, my palette wasn’t trained in Paris but I know what I like!

 

old linens and dishes… oh my!

DSC_0404Well now that I spent a full weekend running around junking, barn picking, and antiquing with friends I actually have to clean the stuff up!

The old large depression glass era bowls that I snapped up at the Smithfield Barn for $6 and $8 cleaned up in a jiffy and will get put away until I need them at Christmas.  DSC_0411

I have a thing about people who talk about setting a beautiful holiday table and then use plastic bowls, mismatched and plastic cutlery, and either paper or plastic plates. And yes, I get the lament that you have kids, it takes more time and so on and so forth.

Guess what? My mother and most of my friends’ mothers used real silverware, linens, and dishes and so on for the holidays and we did not destroy the stuff. Yes it requires more effort, but it looks so much better. And why go to the trouble of cooking up a storm of fabulous in your holiday kitchen to have it look like a Wawa?

paper platesI have probably just insulted a whole slew of people, but I can’t help it.  To me it is like an insult to what comes out of the kitchen.  A woman I used to know used to do that.  She would half-set her table with aluminum foil pans just plunked on the table at Thanksgiving and never met a paper plate  she did not love.  But her “good” dishes were brown crockery and they looked like mud so there is no accounting for taste.  Seriously though? Paper tablecloths are for picnics and kid birthday parties, and even then I prefer real table linens.

So now all my vintage Christmas linens are soaking in Woolite. I generally use that or liquid Ivory Snow now.  I used to have these soap flakes that came in a blue and white box but I can’t remember what they were called, nor do I see them in the grocery stores now.  I will carefully rinse them and hang them up to dry and then iron them.  I know a lot of people send their linens out to be laundered by the dry cleaner but with vintage linens that often leads to yellowing.

And let us get into the cost of things.  I am a bargain hunter.  I might love good old linens and dishes and so on but if I am at a Flea Market or garage sale or something similar I will walk away from things I know are overpriced for what they are and more importantly WHERE they are.  Whether it is an old tablecloth, a platter, or even vintage Christmas décor do not be afraid to ask for a best price or bundled price if you are buying a few things.

I have found everything I need for this Christmas as far as how I want my table to look, and the things I wish to decorate with.  It will be slightly retro Christmas, but there is something to be said about that simple and pretty look.

Of course now I will spend the next few weeks agonizing over menus.  Am thinking of doing a country pâté since I scored that cool commercial loaf pan.  And of course lots of cookies!

Taking the time to set your holiday tables with real dishes and linens pays off. Another thing – if you are having a crowd a buffet is fine if you don’t really have the space for sit down. I would rather my guests be comfortable than knocking elbows at the table because they are crammed in like

What are you all planning for the holidays? Do we want to do a cookie recipe exchange on this blog? As in send your favorite cookie recipe in via a comment and so on? Let me know!

love vintage ornaments ?

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….. Then you will want to hit the Smithfield barn this weekend while they still have them. This is part of what I acquired today.

I also scored two vintage artificial tabletop trees, also known as feather trees. The “feathers” are artificial which puts them on the newer side of vintage, but I do not care as they are the exact dimensions I need for a Christmas Day tablescape!

I love decorating for Christmas, although you will not find me decorating now as that’s a little too American big box retailer for me.

I have been collecting vintage ornaments since before Martha Stewart made it cool. And why I like finding the ornaments at places like the Smithfield Barn is the prices are modest, and that way I can afford to have a beautiful looking house for the holidays. And I think vintage Christmas ornaments make everything more beautiful!

Anyway if you like vintage ornaments, and fun holiday decorating, you’re going to want to see what Kristin has out at the barn, the Smithfield barn in Downingtown. PA. Check out their Facebook page for hours of operation this weekend and their address.

Also tomorrow is the second day of AngelFest at St. Paul’s Episcopal Church on Route 30 in Exton!

new twist on seasonal classic

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Enough politics! Life is more fun when you bake, so let’s talk pie. Pumpkin pie to be precise. ‘Tis the official season after all. This is my twist on the classic pumpkin pie and I have baked it- yesterday morning as a matter of fact.

I had a memorial service for one of my best an oldest friends mothers and as some of our high school friends were coming in from out of town, my sweet man and I opened our home to a casual cooperative dinner.

The table was all fall with a cheese plate of robust cheeses; a salad of arugula, spinach, radicchio and romaine; a cornbread that was like a soufflé; salsas and chips from East Goshen Farmers’ Market. And pumpkin pie and pumpkin bars with chocolate chips. Repair this with a beautiful rose wine from Wolffer Estate – a vineyard on Long Island in Sagaponack, NY. There was also a lively California Red, but and allergic to red wine so I can’t recall what it was. My friend Laura made the chili and it was awesome. It was a turkey chili and you would never have known.

This cooperative supper in a way was the perfect meal following memorial service tribute to a woman who began life on the Plains of Clovis, New Mexico. She was a remarkable woman who was all about friends and family, so I think she would’ve approved of last night’s casual supper.

It was a rare treat to be with some of my friends from high school, as we don’t see each other often enough anymore given distance and kid and other schedules.

They all enjoyed the pie for dessert, I hope you do too.

Incidentally I sent my fall table as a buffet last night with various dishes I have collected over the years, using mostly depression glass last night that was clear.

The napkins were a deep purple linen my mother had given me, the tablecloth a cranberry red vintage Irish linen picked up at a tag sale, and I used actual silverware.

A lot of people seem to take shortcuts with plastic utensils , paper plates and plastic cups, and I think were all grownups and we can set the table once in a while. I don’t think everything has to necessarily match hundred percent, and I love it when I’m able to put a table together with things I have picked up here and there. I would rather wash dishes and enjoy how I set my table.

Now the recipe:

Get out a small sauté pan- I have an 8 inch copper pan I scored on eBay – add 1/4 cup organic unsweetened coconut flakes, 1/4 cup pecan pieces, 1/4 cup walnut pieces, 2 tablespoons butter, 6 tablespoons sugar. Over moderate heat, cook everything up until nuts are all mixed up and toasty- butter and sugar coating it all. Set aside to cool.

Time to make a pie crust.

Crust:
1 1/4 c flour
3 tablespoons buttermilk powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/3 cup unsalted butter
2 tablespoons grated fresh ginger
1/3 cup sugar (white)
4-6 tablespoons ice water

Mix flour, sugar, salt, ginger, buttermilk powder. Cut in butter in bits with pastry cutter. Add water one tablespoon at a time and bring your dough together. I have the range of tablespoons because sometime the dough comes together with less, sometimes more. Roll your dough in a ball and wrap tight in plastic wrap and refrigerate about 25 minutes.

Next pre heat oven to 425 degrees

Get out a big mixing bowl.

Mix :

3/4 cup white sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
1 teaspoon ground cardamom
2 teaspoons grated fresh ginger
1 teaspoon ground mace

To that add:

2 eggs and beat

To that add:

1 15 ounce can of pumpkin- not purée in a can, but plain pumpkin

1 12 ounce can of evaporated milk

Beat it up until frothy

Set aside

Get out your dough and roll out until you can fit in a pie pan – I like 9 inch deep dish glass pie plates – I use vintage ones – some of which are pie plates. The dough goes into an UNgreased pie plate by the way.

Take a tablespoon or so if soft butter and coat the crust in the plan – I learned this trick watching Chef Robert Irvine one time – keeps crust from getting mushy .

Pour pumpkin into pie shell. Take nut mixture and sprinkle in a ring at edges of pumpkin. Cover your outer crust edge with either foil or one of those pie rungs to keep edges from burning . Put pie into 425 oven for 18 minutes, then reduce heat to 350 and bake 50 to 59 minutes or until knife comes out of center of pie clean.

It is a pie you need to babysit in the oven but try to NOT open oven door a lot

Cool pie for a couple of hours. Serve with real whipped cream LIGHTLY sweetened and dusted with cinnamon. Refrigerate leftovers.

a quick bread martha stewart would hate

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So here I am humble blogger and home chef experimenting with a quick bread recipe. Face it, quick bread batter is like basic cookie dough and it depends on what you add to it.

I have been playing with a new recipe. And no, Martha Stewart was not harmed in its creation.

Fall sweet bread – a quick bread in progress

Good for breakfast with apple butter or almond butter.

Makes 1 loaf.

Batter:

1/2 cup butter, softened

1 1/4 cups sugar – I prefer light brown

1 egg

1 cup buttermilk or 1 cup of milk with 4 tablespoons buttermilk powder

2 cups flour – either half whole wheat and half white flour or all whole wheat flour

2 teaspoons baking soda

small dash salt

Teaspoon each of cinnamon, ground mace, cardamom for **sugar mixture

2 teaspoons cinnamon, 1 teaspoon ground mace, cardamom, ginger for batter

**Cinnamon sugar mixture:
2/3 cup sugar
2 teaspoons cinnamon
1 teaspoon cardamom

Plain oatmeal for final top sprinkling

Pre-heat oven

Grease and flour one 9×5 loaf pan.

Cream together butter, 1 cup sugar, and egg. Add milk, flour, spices , and baking soda.

Mix well.

Put 1/3 of batter in greased loaf pan.

Mix in separate bowl the 2/3 cup sugar and cinnamon.

Sprinkle 1/3 of the sugar spice mixture on top of the batter in pan.

Add 1/2 of remaining batter to pan and sprinkle 1/2 the remaining sugar spice mixture. Repeat one last time and give a swirl with a knife. Sprinkle top with a little plain oatmeal.

Bake at 350 degrees in your preheated oven for 45-60 minutes or until toothpick comes clean.

Cool in pan for at least 20 minutes before removing from pan.

The problem I have with this recipe is working out the kinks in baking time. Adding whole wheat flour or baking completely with whole wheat flour changes how it bakes.

The last time I baked this I used ALL whole wheat flour and it took just shy of 60 minutes to bake. And I let it cool in the warm oven with the oven door open for a few minutes. When you use brown sugar and all whole wheat flour this is a pretty heavy and dense, yet moist brown bread.

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put a monogrammed grosgrain ribboned sock in it, martha.

martha

The faux W.A.S.P. from Nutley, NJ has gone too far this time.

Martha Stewart in an interview this week with Bloomberg news says (and I quote):

“Who are these bloggers? They are not trained editors at Vogue Magazine. I mean there are bloggers writing recipes that aren’t tested, that aren’t necessarily very good, or are copies of everything really good editors have created and done.

Sooo, bloggers, create kind of…ummmm popularity but they are not experts and we have to understand that.”

Martha, you lost me a long time ago and it did not even have to do with your jail stint.  Many moons ago when Martha Stewart Living first came out I was a devotee.  But then I discovered that everything you liked as a collectible so went up in price mere mortals couldn’t collect those items any longer.  An example? Antique oil lamps. When you plunked them in a magazine, and possibly on the cover many years ago the prices went up exponentially.  I stopped collecting them.  Same with every time you mentioned anything from transferware to pressed glass. Even vintage linens and quilts were untouchable for a while.

So you created an empire. As a woman I am cool with that. But you certainly are not without fault, and as a matter of fact I remember writing an email to your company years ago, because I, a mere mortal noted a glaring mistake in some recipe of yours I tried.  It was for the garden and roses, not the kitchen.  A spray with baking soda and what not in it.  Your proportions were incorrect. Naturally I never received a reply, because after all, you also invented the word “perfect”.

But Martha Stewart, you did not invent blogging.  And I am not even sure you really write your own blog all of the time because if you read it the writing voices often sound different and if you are a blogger like myself, you know that bloggers have individual voices and writing styles.

And you certainly did not invent the “whole category of lifestyle”.  There is no doubt you contributed to it, but lady, you did not invent it.  It existed before you, it will exist after you.

So why take pot shots at bloggers?  Afraid of a little competition? Afraid we are coming up with ideas and recipes that are better than what you have to offer and we can do it without attitude?

I take an exception to what you said to Bloomberg and am amused at the same time.  The Vogue reference, for example.  When were you an editor at Vogue?  Martha Helen Kostyra Stewart you have done well for yourself, but wow, Queen Elizabeth the first you are not.

I get that you are a long way now from your humble roots in Jersey City, NJ and Nutley, NJ and one of the things I used to like about you was your mother.  Now she was cool and fun to learn from when you had her on your TV show and weren’t afraid of an old Polish woman stealing your spotlight. You married well and became an instant W.A.S.P. just add water.  In my neck of the woods women like you used to be referred to as social-climbing gold diggers, but I won’t be rude and I digress.

But when it comes to bloggers aren’t experts, who said we all were?  I am only an expert in my own world. I am not Martha Stewart or the Pope, after all.  But I will put my gardening prowess and kitchen skills up against you any day.

To say home cooks who blog do not test their recipes and they are copies of I assume YOUR recipes and aren’t very good, well who died and made you Julia Child, my dear?  I can’t speak for all bloggers, but I can tell you MY recipes are tested in MY kitchen before I share any of them and they are MY own recipes.  Most of the time I don’t even write them down. And I know my recipes work because too many people have tried them and oh yeah, I am even in the Epicurious Cookbook.

I sat and listened to you pimp for several retailers in your Bloomberg interview and as I listened to you trash talk everyone who did not kiss the hem of your royal garment I realized what a lot of this is about: you are getting OLD Martha.  “Work”, dermatological fillers, and a clever but classic wardrobe can’t cover the fact that you are a long time from your salad days, aren’t you?

Poor, poor Martha.  Like an aging cat with clumps of fur coming out here and there, you claw at the world desperately trying to keep the throne you seem to have become accustomed to.  The only thing is, you are a legend mostly in your own mind at this point.  I mean I knew you were desperate when you did Match.com on the Today Show. 

Here is a hint Martha: apologize and don’t wear so many Hillary Clinton-esque pant suits. Or put a grosgrain monogrammed sock in that big mouth of yours.

And you can kiss my blogging behind.  As opposed to you I am not running for some popularity contest, I write about what I want, when I want….for me.  I love a lot of the old-fashioned house wifely things you used to extol. I love hunting for cool things like vintage linens and I like to cook, garden, and keep house.  And I am very good at it.  But why I do it is a little different from you.  I do these things because they bring me and those I love pleasure.

You see Martha, it is the simple pleasures in life that you cannot take for granted.  We will all age, you apparently are having issues doing it gracefully.

So Martha, just shut up.

For more on Martha Invents the blogosphere read:

Babble: Oh, Martha Stewart. Why Did You Go and Get the Bloggers Mad?

By SunnyChanel |  October 16th, 2013 at 2:00 pm

 

Mail Online: ‘I started this whole category of lifestyle’: Martha Stewart dismisses  homemaking rival Gwyneth Paltrow’s GOOP

By  Daily Mail Reporter PUBLISHED: 15:06 EST, 15  October 2013 |  UPDATED: 15:34 EST, 15 October 2013

Bloomberg TV:   Martha Stewart Speaks Out: Bloggers Are Not Experts

Martha Stewart declares that she ‘started this whole category of lifestyle’

Babble: Here’s Why Martha Stewart Is Trash Talking Bloggers    By cecilyk |  October 16th, 2013 at 4:47 pm