Some may consider this post a giant word salad. To me it’s just a collection of things, I have been observing and thinking about for almost a couple of weeks now.
Social media is literally the most fascinating, sociological character study of human nature and behavior that exists.
People want you to only believe their opinion matters. Even if you disagree with someone, the art of conversation is quickly disappearing. Especially online because you’re looking at words on a screen. Sometimes you can get with the emotion behind the words are but a lot of times you can’t, and it can always be a different interpretation because it’s words on a page and people see things differently.
But it’s all how they translate those words, right? Because no human voice means lots of room for interpretation, right?
One example is billboards as an issue are heating up again in Chester County. And I had this crazy interaction with this woman recently who couldn’t just disagree with other people’s positions, she was pretty ignorant about the thoughts of others. And this is someone who is asking for people to help her out with a project of hers on social media that is a business of sorts and she’s very public about it. But she’s one of these people that has to have the last word even when she’s a guest somewhere. And hey, if that’s her jam, that’s fine. But it doesn’t mean that I have to listen.
And that’s one of those things that is so frustrating about social media. Sometimes you just have those who drown out all of the other voices in an online conversation. Or anytime anyone disagrees with you or you them, they tell you that you are a bad person. When did not being a mirror image of everyone else become bad? Different = bad? We are all sheeple on the social media bus?
Speaking of sheeple let’s address the oh they are tops in their field because a magazine says so. Does anyone remember the who’s who books and directories of years gone by? You may have been chosen, but you pay for the privilege / listing. Same thing today with magazines.
Justin Volz, special to ProPublica
Companies cash in by calling physicians “Super Doctor,” “Best Doctor” or “Top Doctor” and then selling them opportunities to boast about the honor. Experts call the accolades a “scam.” Giving me one highlights the absurdity.
by Marshall Allen Feb. 28, 2019, 5 a.m. EST
My eyes narrowed when the woman on the voice message told me to call about my “Top Doctor” award.
~ Read more here: https://www.propublica.org/article/top-doctors-award-journalist
Sorry not sorry, had to get that out there because these top categories like the who’s who listings. People are asked but they pay for the privilege so isn’t it really just like an ad or marketing buy? ( See this link HERE for example.)
Yep this post is indeed jumping around.
I’m also always amused with who decides to hate me as a blogger. I make no secret of this.
This week I had this woman do the proverbial slide into my DM‘s. It was to tell me that I was a terrible horrible person and I was also not the right kind of breast cancer survivor. She did this shaming thing one time before, and I had forgotten about her because the insipid always fade away. Then this chick surfaced again, and was obsessive this time to the point where she contacted a friend of mine at 1:20 AM. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised because she contacted me that same overnight timeframe at 2:20 AM, where unless you are bat or on an overnight shift you should be asleep, or at least not sending people messages.
And that seems to be a growing trend, which is equal parts pathetic and disturbing. If you don’t like something that someone says on social media, you can’t just let it go or comment back, that’s too normal. In fact, these people are seeking out friends of whomever they don’t like saying something or that person themselves and private messaging. This woman this week in particular is perpetually the flying monkey of others. But she also seems to have a lack of self-awareness that what they’re doing is pretty freaking strange.
Speaking of strange recently, I heard from someone I literally have not heard from in a year. And it really was a not to say “hi” it was because they needed something from me. That’s actually hurtful. It make one feel like they are no longer an actual friend. Normally I’m happy to do things for people but when an entire year has gone by, it makes it a little difficult, or at least for me. And I realize life gets busy and time passes before you even know it, but still.…it hurts because it makes you feel like a use not a person. And I don’t even know if I’m articulating that properly.
I think it’s kind of a simple thing: when you make yourself available to people, who are your friends whenever they need somebody to talk to. You do it with a glad and open heart. After all, it’s a friend it’s someone you care about. And you don’t help your friends or listen to your friends because you’re keeping book. It’s not a tit for tat of I did this now you should do X. But it is a question of mutual consideration sometimes, I guess is the best way of putting it. It’s just one of those things in life that sometimes feels a little unfair. It’s not terminal to a friendship per se, but it makes you hit the reset button for a little while. And I think that’s OK.
But I think in general, the world’s gotten kind of scrambled in the past few years. I wish I could just say it was Covid, but I think it’s a lot of things rolled into a big ball of messy. I don’t think social media necessarily makes it better to you? I can’t really decide. I mean, it’s great that you can stay connected to people you wouldn’t normally be able to stay connected to easily, but then it’s the consideration of are we too connected? Are some of the mysteries of life just gone forever?
And the people still obsessed with the Main Line. They still don’t get that even though it’s the nouveau Main Line and not the old Main Line, they still kind of have to be invited into certain circles. And it’s painful to watch.
In other hands-down welcome to the occasional bizarro world this week was a conversation with a local police department, that was not my own. This very nice detective called to tell me that they were closing the investigation on me and I hadn’t done anything wrong. Of course, I didn’t actually know someone was investigating me.
Why you ask, would somebody be investigating me? Has to do with a public figure which is what is even crazier.
Why?
Because it seems a little crazy that you have someone who says they are a public figure, and behaves in the matter of a public figure, wanting to be an influencer or something, who called this police department when essentially they want people to look at them all of the time? They called this police department essentially because they didn’t like something I said, as a blogger about something things posted publicly. Again this is a person who operates as a self proclaimed, public figure. And then, of course, there is that pesky little thing called the First Amendment, right?
Part of this scenario involved pointing out what looked like another Facebook account with their posts on it. So I literally said either they got hacked/cloned or they created another profile with their stuff on it and why? Will I admit, I was slightly sarcastic about it? Yes, but that’s not a problem or illegal. It’s opinion/amusement. And if someone was truly impersonating them, say thank you for pointing it out. But no, I was accused of creating that odd public profile.
Obviously, I didn’t.
And think about it logically: if you were going to go out of your way to create a fake public profile on a public figure would you tell everyone? I hate to break it to this guy, but I create fan pages on saving farms and historic houses and historic sites. Not people.
So this person, a public figure, who self brands as a public figure, who posts pretty much public everything except perhaps changing the toilet paper roll, has come a wee bit unglued in my opinion. Also perfectly legal. They went on to tell this nice detective that I had been essentially bothering his family too? I don’t know his family, and people who know me, and who have known me as a blogger know that one of the things I don’t is talk about someone’s partners, spouses, or children. And again, this is a person who lives life out loud publicly on social media as a public figure, including photos of their minor aged children. Even a lot of the people in Bravo’s reality franchises don’t post things about their kids all of the time.
So now, as I end the week, people are discovering if they choose to like my blog’s social media on Facebook, this public figure blocks them? Has Facebook definitely become the battles of middle school lunch tables? You can know them on social media, but you can’t like my posts? Is this for real or is this a coincidence or just pretzel logic? And even if it is for real it’s not the real world we should be living in is it? People you do what you want. I don’t see social media as a popularity contest.
And these weird things don’t just happen to me although this week it feels like it. These things happen to lots of people out there. it’s the world we’re living in. So sometimes you just have to like ask yourself if we are better since the onset of social media or worse?
I don’t quite know where to go sometimes with what people post on social media. I am sure people feel the same about me at times. But I like to live in the real world, so when people question something I post, it’s often because it’s not their limited comfort level and/or it’s not happy enough and farting rainbows and unicorns and butterflies.
Another somewhat related segue…. like little things I miss. For example, don’t you miss the art of real letter writing, and even thank you notes? Do you remember growing up and being excited to get a letter? Or feeling touched that someone cared enough about something you did to send you a note or perhaps a thank you note? It’s like with the onset of social media, those things don’t happen anymore. And I’m sad because I still like stationary. I still use stationary.
Other things I miss is being able to have conversations with people and even if you are on the opposite sides of an issue, it’s still a great conversation and you walk away friends. Now it’s whoever gets all the toys wins, and you even see that reflected in our politics from the most local of races and issues through to Washington DC. It’s not and never will be a recipe for success IMHO.
It used to be that people did things they felt were meaningful because it was the right thing to do. Not because they wanted people to adore them on social media, and the reality is the quiet doers of this world are still out there, but they don’t post about it on social media.
I’m thinking all of us should do a social media detox once in a while. Just take a time out not because anything is wrong and we know we really won’t suffer from FOMO fear of missing out. Use that time to check in with your friends in real time. Take a walk work in the garden look up at the sky and admire life. Get fresh perspective. Cook something. Go shopping just because.
Just get off of the hamster wheel.
TTFN
