Life in the land of women is one of my recurring writing themes. It’s not something that some of the chest puffing neanderthals and their flying monkeys who would love to tear me down for having an opinion or twenty would ever understand.
I think partially that is because they don’t have honest relationships with anyone. Generosity of spirit is not something that can be taught. It is inherent; you have it or you don’t.
Real friendships aren’t bought or bartered for. It’s not based on using people.
I have always said I don’t use the term blessed very often, but I am blessed in my friendships. I have my circle of female friends, but I don’t trust a lot of women. I can be somewhat jaded at times, and even somewhat cynical other times, even though they are not the same thing.
I think what I have seen in life might in some cases makes me believe in a better humanity, but on the other hand, it makes me less trusting. I hate to say that sometimes I am that person that wonders why do they want to get to know me? And I know on one hand that’s kind of horrible, but on the other hand, it’s self preservation.
When I first moved to Chester County to be with my now husband, there were a couple of women I met that I thought would be great friends until they weren’t. One I just didn’t have that much in common at the end of the day, although she is super nice. It’s still nice to occasionally bump into her.
Now the other one? She got to know me in order to get information about me to use to curry favor with others. That other woman was like the dog that who carried the proverbial bone 24/7. But she was one of those people that was also too friendly too fast, so I never truly let her in. This woman is and always will be a user. I wasn’t the first person she’s ever used and I certainly won’t be the last.
The second woman with whom I had the unpleasant experience is seemingly somewhat clueless about her behavior. I remember a year after I realized she wasn’t someone truly to be friends with, she called me out of the blue to see if I was driving a certain kind of car down the road because she passed me on the road. I mean, who does that? do you judge your friendships by the kind of car they drive? I mean don’t speak with her for ages and that is the superficial reason for contact?
And then there were those who were done with me when I moved from the Main Line. I left the mothership of pretense that the area had evolved into, which while it freed me to become a better, more comfortable version of myself, simultaneously made me less useful or even uncomfortable to my others. I can’t control their feelings, yet I still marvel at them.
So this week, I had the opportunity to catch up with two very long term friends. One recently became a widow and one lost her dad.
We’ve known each other since we were kids. Our parents were friends. I am now the only one with a surviving parent and that is such an odd feeling. However, every time I connect with either of these women, I realize how lucky I am. A lot of people don’t have these friendships.
And then today, I finally had time to catch up with another old friend who lives close by. We’ve literally known each other since like I was in eighth grade and she was in seventh grade. Or maybe it was she was in eighth grade and I was in ninth grade. I forget.
The thing about all three of these women I am thinking about is that we know each other so well that it is not only comfortable and trusting we can be completely ourselves. And that’s the thing today that is so different. You can’t just be completely yourself with anyone.
And I’m also really lucky with the friends that I have made since coming to Chester County who count as new friends. I do have to make that distinction because there are a lot of us who have been friends seemingly forever are former Main Liners who migrated west because it was just better as the faces of the Main Line changed and became Nouveaux Main Line.
People often don’t understand why you’re friends with someone because they’re pre-judging you before you even walk in the door. And people always prejudge me because they read what I write and either don’t understand it or sometimes don’t like it, so then it is like why would you want to know her? I do have to laugh at those people because the question they should be asking is why would I want to know them? And a lot of the time I don’t want to know them, and I think that bothers them more than if I wanted to know which is just the perversity of human nature.
Yesterday I spent time with two more of my female friends. One used to ride the bus with me is how far back we go. The other? It must be gosh 20 years since I first met her. These are the people who matter in our lives. Not the people who are fly by nights or even a season.
The people who matter are the ones who see us at our best and we are comfortable enough for them to see us not at our best. The people who matter are the ones whom accept us for who we are.
Hello Chester County! Welcome to the nastiest race in Chester County! The Honey Brook Thug Politics Cabal is in a FULL ON swivet because people like Valerie Shultz and they want better in local government than those people.
Sadly, every day these pathetic humans are harassing people including the executive branch of the Chesco GOP in West Chester, aren’t they?
I mean, I guess this is a step up and intimidation and harassment tactics from some rando truck following people around in Honey Brook Township on occasion, including somebody’s kids right? But how you know it’s Honeybrook there’s nothing to see here, right?
What’s next? Mythical complaints to voter services about campaign signs without a disclaimer or whatever? Note to cabal: buy better readers at The WalMart because they are there, however where bubba was a hoodie is concerned what is it with him referencing a benefactor on his signs yet say something like paid for by the candidate?
And is he taking down his own signs to say they are being stolen? Or is he placing them on private property where he doesn’t have explicit permission to post his lame signs?
Honey Brook, stop the badness and the madness with these people and #vote4val
My disclaimer: I’m exercising my first amendment rights. I am not part of any campaign. I do not donate financially to political campaigns and never have. I believe in paying it forward and that is what I am doing here.
Honey Brook deserves better than the thug politics cabal which also extends to the Twin Valley School Board. Vote for change; break the cabal with a #vote4val
I make no secret of the fact that FarmBoy BBQ is one of my favorite local businesses or that I know the owner. I think they have the best barbecue around and their brisket is like a religious experience.
However, I wrote a post here in August about how difficult it is getting in there because of PennDot and their endless sink hole remediation project. The project has been forever and seems to be way behind schedule.
Farm Boy is located at 625 N. Morehall Road (AKA Route 29) in Malvern.
But guess what I discovered completely by accident today? Farm Boy is on Instacart under the restaurant tab for our area!
So if you would like to help out this restaurant so that they survive PennDot hell part two (they already had to live through this sink hole remediation once with PennDot ), place an order on Instacart and Uber Eats if you don’t want to deal with the aggravation and delays created by PennDot!
Trust me, you’ll be glad you did. And if you’ve never tried Farm Boy, this is as good an excuse as any.
And if you have an extra few minutes, please contact our state Senator Katie Muth, and tell her that PennDot is strangling small businesses with their delays on Route 29.
My parents always had interesting people whom they knew. They were raising us during a time where it was all corporate America all the time in the Main Line/Philadelphia area, and I appreciated all those f the different kinds of interesting people they knew as opposed to just the stiff corporate types. And one of those people was Dr. Donald Rosato.
Well known in equine circles, he also was very much of a quiet philanthropist that you could always count on attending a nonprofit fundraiser and so on. He was a familiar face at Devon, Radner Hunt, Ludwig‘s Corner Horse Show and much more. I also always used to see him in more recent years at benefits for Natural Lands, for example. In more recent years, my mother and stepfather would run into he and Judy at benefits for the English Speaking Union. I think the last time I saw him anywhere was a couple of years ago.
Dr. Rosato was a very congenial man. I was to his home a few times over the course of my life, and one time in particular it was after we went carriaging with him when my sister and her husband were newlyweds. He had given my sister a carriaging day as a wedding present.
I will always remember that afternoon, Chester County was a lot less developed then. Halfway through that afternoon, we stopped down a dirt road or path to have a little picnic at this 18th century stone cottage that he owned that had been restored somewhat, but it did not have modern conveniences. It was frozen in time and it was simply beautiful. That was in the 1990s.
And a thing about Dr. Rosato were his wonderful dogs, as well as his amazingly beautiful horses. I also loved his beautiful restored farm house and his collection of carriages. The only other collection I ever remember that would have even rival his was the one from even further back in my childhood owned by Mr. Gwinn in Gladwyne. But Dr. Rosato’s horses were always better.
Dr. Rosato is someone I never saw without a smile on his face, and he had this remarkable ability to remember people, even if he hadn’t seen them in years. He was also very quietly kind to people who needed kindness.
I learned this morning from a friend the Dr. Rosato passed away a few days ago. He was 90 years old. He has survived by his lovely wife, Judy and his children from his first marriage. He’s also survived by all of the people in the equine circles in Chester County that he was very much a part of.
He was a familiar face on many of the back roads in Chester Springs and West Vincent in his carriages. He didn’t just drag them out for Devon or special occasions, he was a regular fixture on local roads.
The last time I was invited to go carriaging was in 2017. It was at that point in time that I realized how much the entire area had changed and how people did not know how to safely go around carriages on the road.
As a matter of fact, one of the things I remember from that day other than the sheer awesomeness of being in one of his carriages driving around Chester Springs, were a couple of extremely rude drivers in cars.
Of course what used to amuse me were all the people that thought they could just call him up and say take me for a carriage ride. You had to be invited, and it was special. And when you went for a ride with him, you also got a little history of the area. He would tell you about the farms, the area, and the houses.
Main Line Today wrote an article about him a few years ago:
So I got to do something totally FUN the other day and exciting for me. I got to preview Frazer Antiques new store in their new location further east from where they were on Route 30/Lancaster Avenue in Malvern/Frazer.
It’s a lot of familiar faces that we all love from the original store plus some new faces, some which are already familiar to me. It was just the most positive wonderful thing to see. For example, Daisy Cottage Antiques from Morgantown is coming!
I was very sad, as were so many, when we heard after decades in one location, they literally lost their lease and were getting the heave ho. Well everything happens for a reason and this is a much better space with wonderful flow.
They are loaded with all sorts of interesting things and I think the store is going to be fabulous and it’s a good location because the parking is much easier, among other things.
(If you need an artisanal chocolate gift that will knock your socks off, they will be carrying some of the Ben Wollenberg Chocolates from Canton, OH.)
The soft opening is Monday, September 8 as far as I know.
179 Lancaster Avenue is the address and down the same driveway as Tague Lumber and Malvern Collision.
I hope you love it as much as I do. #shoplocal #vintage #antiques #lovelocal
And let’s get real, how long does it take to place pumpkins yourself? The answer is it doesn’t. You can do it yourself, promise!!
But remember: to be trendy you are supposed to hire people to pumpkin. Personally, I will never be trendy and I am proud of it. I also skipped the beige beige world of interior decorating like I live in a Pottery Barn/ West Elm catalog too. (And I am damn proud if it too!)
And these people who have to be “professionally” pumpkined? Ha! How does your HOA feel at the end of pumpkin time when they need to be disposed of if you are a development dweller? And not all of these pumpkin vomiting on porch businesses offer removal, and if they do, yeah, that costs extra, doesn’t it?
Pumpkin placement services are joy suckers. And expensive. And everything these people do no matter where you live, all looks the same.
Do you really want to be Stepford about pumpkins too?
And the headlines are pouring in. It’s official: Villanova University was “swatted.”
What does that mean? That means false reports were called in causing all of this activity. As per NBC 10 and 6 ABC the two channels I was watching, the call came into the 911 Call Center in Delaware County.
But what I am learning from people who live in close enough proximity to Villanova that they should’ve been the alerted the same time as the on campus population , yet they say that was not necessarily so?
I have spoken to some neighbors down there and I was told basically they found out after everyone else and they’re not happy. It’s not easy being a neighbor of that school. I don’t know how much of a delay there was, or if it’s more a misperception than fact, but it needs to be addressed publicly and rather soon.
Villanova has a security model where they have their own police force and there was quite the contretemps over that. I think it was about 2016. Police Superintendent at that point was Bill Colarulo and he didn’t think it was a good idea. And residents definitely weren’t happy.
Neighbors are not happy. Did not receive alerts. I heard the news from another friend.
Wonder if Stoneleigh was alerted and the houses on and off County Line Road?
So apparently, when I asked kind of how long it was, I was told:
After the fact and an hour late.
Ouch. Residents and taxpayers of Radnor also asking how much this cost Radnor Township today. I don’t know that they’ll ever get the true numbers but is it safe to say at least $50,000 if not more? I mean it was a massive response from multiple municipalities not just in Delaware County, but all over.
This is not Radnor’s fault this happened. But if it ends up, there was a delay between Villanova University, and any kind of notifications to the public, who obviously are close by, that’s a problem. People have already been concerned over the years of how Villanova has handled sexual assaults and other things, haven’t they? Please, by all means correct me if I’m wrong.
Right now all I have are questions, and so do neighbors closest to the school. Far too many people are being left with an uneasy feeling after this exercise today that wasn’t an exercise, or reality, it was in fact a hoax.
I’m hoping that Radnor, Villanova University, and the district attorney of Delaware County and other agencies will address this so if this is a misperception, it is cleared up immediately.
Now let’s talk about who did this. I think they will find whoever it is. It might take time because the call came into a call center. And once you sift through that information, law-enforcement will next have to go to phone providers and that requires paperwork and fees and like a subpoena or something. You see telecommunications companies tell you they cooperate with law-enforcement, but basically they cooperate for a price. I actually know this personally.
People think those calls are anonymous, but actually they aren’t. And people do get caught and charged. And when they get caught here, it won’t be some minor in fraction, I think something like this probably rises to the category of terroristic threats, or something.
I don’t know what the motivation would be for someone to do this other than to freak out and immediate community, a university campus, and tons of parents dropping their kids off for their first year of college. It’s not funny.
I think the police did an amazing job. I think Villanova got to stress test their plans, and that’s a hard situation. You have people getting these alerts on campus they’re outside for a mass for the beginning of school and then all of a sudden people are running and chairs are getting knocked over. People could’ve gotten hurt any single way you slice this.
And when I think of the people, I know personally, who did not find out at first who had kids stuck in businesses up close to campus on Route 30, and people who are just trying to come home and people who were home, wondering if they were safe is simply not acceptable.
Governor Josh Shapiro stated that this act of swatting Villanova University on move in day was a cruel hoax, and he reminded everyone that this is actually an illegal act. He has instructed the Pennsylvania State Police to help in whatever way they can to find whoever it is who did this. he and other today also reported that what happened today regardless of whether it was real or a hoax was every parent’s nightmare.
If there’s anyone out there who knows who might have done this, they really need to go to law-enforcement. And I can’t help but wonder if every parent who dropped a kid off at that school today is not having a second thought or two, along with every parent everywhere that’s doing the same thing right now.
Oh hello dear readers! How are you today on this now cloudy slightly dampish Saturday?
Did you know that I live life in the fast lane?
It’s kind of a no, not really response, but I am once again, fascinated by people whom I choose to have nothing to do with being so fascinated with me.
First up this week was an important local meeting where I shared meeting information for residents who wanted to know the details of the meeting. So I provided the location, and the fact that they could access it on Zoom.
After I posted the comments started. Today when you give people the information they’re seeking and they say they couldn’t possibly make time for what they say is important to them. It’s their community, they expect change, yet they don’t want to participate where they live.
I literally said to one person that they could Zoom it, and I continued that you don’t have to have your camera on or your audio on. You can simply have the meeting on and the volume turned up so when it gets to the part that is of interest, you can come watch it. I literally do that a lot because no, we always don’t have time to go to meetings in person or sit and listen to an entire Zoom meeting. This person subsequently replied along the lines of wow what a privileged statement and how is that a privileged statement?
How is giving someone the meeting information they wanted and giving them their options a privileged statement? Or was it the fact that I said OK I was just providing the information, and said people make time for what’s important to them?
People in communities everywhere often demand to know what’s going on in their communities because heaven forbid they look at their municipal website. But when you give them the information they seek, they couldn’t possibly, they’re too busy, they have kids.
Again, my response is pretty simple. That’s their choice but people make time for what’s important to them.
Is this something I’m supposed to do for them? Or the ones who hold up the yellow flag for kids. Do they think they are the only people who have ever had children or worked while having children or had children and did other things?
Again, people make time for what’s important to them. And the ones who want everyone else to do everything for them, don’t like it when you point that out.
Next up was an unsolicited private message from a local politician, who also happens to be a lawyer.
Let’s begin it doesn’t take a genius to read an agenda. It’s pretty straightforward. These municipal agendas tell you what’s going on in a meeting and when they include a packet with documents that further explain what’s going on in a meeting it’s not so hard to interpret is it? I love it when you get the feels like but of course it’s not an intimidation message when you point out what’s happening at an upcoming meeting…. especially when said municipality has documents to back up exactly what is happening and they are all over their website if you know where to look so how does that work, please?
Then you have the social media circus that you have to wonder is this just being propped up by a particular gaslighting guru?
There’s also one person whom I don’t really talk about except once in a while to ask with genuine curiosity about the obsession with me and other local individuals.
When you encounter someone online, who seems dangerously obsessive, are you supposed to never ask questions about that?
I also can’t figure people out who who participate in the barrage of verbal diarrhea on social media who are mostly people that have been taken off of my blog’s Facebook page or something like that … all people I just simply choose not to be around even virtually on social media.
I really don’t get it.
And then there’s this whole thing about the fact that I am showing up on political platforms like I’m a candidate to defeat except I’m not running for office.
These extraordinarily damaged people literally sit on social media platforms and bash me and others like we are a Bravolebrity. Andy Cohen, where’s our bonus?
I did learn a new term today. Someone said I had TDS. I had no idea what that was so I looked it. it’s called Trump Derangement Syndrome. He’s kind of not my guy and I don’t actually talk about him a lot so doesn’t that actually apply to them because they love him so much?
And then there are the psycho assholes with casseroles types who say I’m an operative for the Democratic Party. What’s even funnier are the Democrats who say I am an operative for the Republicans.
These people? This is what they do all day, every day. And then they also send me private messages if I don’t respond to them on a particular social media platform.
These people have zero boundaries. I am not at their beck and call.
And at the end of the day I am still bemused by the fact that I’m still just one person so why are they so obsessed? And then you have these other people who totally rile these others up because they like to see me gaslit and disparaged. And they also actually like to see me threatened. And yes, law enforcement does keep an eye on this stuff in general, as in not for me, but because that is what they do.
I don’t actually know these people who have decided I am evil. I simply don’t want to interact with them. I’m just out here living my life yet they want to tell me and everyone else how we are supposed to live our lives. They want to tell us how we’re supposed to think and what we’re supposed to do. And if we don’t wish to interact with them? That’s simply not acceptable.
And then when they’re not getting enough attention, they will throw something out there like I’m talking about their families. If I am speaking about their families, it’s only in the context of a question as to who are they anyway?
People don’t have to like me and I don’t have to like them. But that doesn’t mean that they get to just sit and try to destroy everyone’s lives, including mine by claiming that’s what I’m doing. I believe the appropriate term is projection?
Well, here we all are. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. What does it mean to you?
We’ve had a year, haven’t we? Thanksgiving means it’s winding down so maybe now we can all take time to enjoy a holiday or two with friends and family?
It’s funny. I don’t know that I have anything particularly profound to say, but when I woke up this morning, I was thinking about Thanksgivings past.
I remember Thanksgiving when I was really little. We went to my mother’s brother’s house. They were the ones that adopted our German Shepherd, Lily Marlene, when my parents decided she wasn’t right for them. Lilly had been given to them by friends of theirs who at the time basically lied about everything about the dog. They just wanted to get rid of her. Lily didn’t like being a city dog. I think it was as simple as that and before us she had been a boy dog and I think she missed that. Lily loved my uncle so one day she went home with him, and she had an amazing life with my cousins and my Aunt and Uncle. And among other things, she became a boy dog once again.
I remember Thanksgiving at this their house. The table was packed and it was a small enough house that it got very warm with the oven and all the people. But it was nice and my Aunt was a good cook. She was also a very warm and welcoming woman and loved kids.
Also when I was little, I remember one particular Thanksgiving when my father’s sister and her family were living in a house they rented in Paoli. I think my paternal grandfather was even still alive at this point.
The house in Paoli doesn’t exist anymore. Shortly after my uncle got relocated by his company to either Florida or Cincinnati (I forget which), that house was eventually sold again and torn down. Because my uncle was living a corporate life with an insurance company he and his family moved fairly frequently when I was little.
The house in Paoli was off of Route 30. I remember it either was off of a private road or like a farm road and it was on the right when you were headed west on Route 30/Lancsster Avenue.
Paoli was still a lot of open space farmland then. Even along Route 30. This was maybe 1968 or so and I remember that because my sister was so little. I remember the house though, and it was a beautiful old farmhouse and it was big  and had great woodwork. I believe it was maybe a Victorian era farmhouse if not earlier, but I was too little to know the difference or precise age. I do remember it was white. It had a big porch and black shutters. There was a barn off to the side that obviously my aunt and uncle didn’t use except to pull a car in, and across from them there were still fields. And pretty big trees. 
My uncle is Cuban, and when I was little, his mother was still alive and there. She was very tiny, dressed in widow’s black clothes, and pretty much spoke Spanish to her son. That was the Thanksgiving where I first had black eyed peas. They were one of the side dishes. I was seated at the children’s table, which was set up in the hall at the base of the front stairs. The house had a beautiful staircase, and I still remember looking into the dining room, which was lovely with a beautiful table and candlelight.
Then at some point as we were growing up, we moved to the suburbs from the city and my parents good friends moved as well to Bethesda, Maryland. We started the tradition of state swapping Thanksgiving. Some years we went there, and some years they came here. I liked it better when we went there because the kids could go into Georgetown that weekend after Thanksgiving Day. Also because the mother in this equation, we’ll call her Mrs. C, was an amazing cook. She also never treated the kids like kids. I don’t know if you remember growing up, but you just had some of the adults that basically talked down to you, and like my parents, she spoke to us normally.
I remember being in the kitchen with Mrs. C as she was preparing Thanksgiving. We were all put to work, but you didn’t mind and it was a pretty big open kitchen and it extended into a family room. She used to make giant turkeys and they were just like perfectly basted things of beauty and oh they smelled so good!
One of the Thanksgivings when it was my parents turn to host, we decided to try eating out, because when this family came, it was a lot more people than could necessarily fit comfortably in our dining room, although we did do it a lot of the time. (Besides, if my mother could get out of cooking, she would.)
So this one Thanksgiving, we went to a restaurant in Radnor called The Greenhouse. People today would know this location as 333 Bellrose, which was owned by a friend of mine until a couple of years ago when he sold it. My high school friend opened it originally in 1999.
The Greenhouse Restaurant was owned by a Mary Bentley. Before she opened a restaurant there, according to Main Line Media News :
….Between 1953 and 1975 it was a gift shop and garden center called Radnor House. Part of it is literally a converted stable built in 1769 and although it sounds like a joke, local historians say that George Washington’s horse actually slept there – not George himself, but his horse.
In 1975 Mary Mitchell Bentley, of Bryn Mawr, had survived a traumatic divorce and opened the first restaurant there, the Greenhouse. She had no previous experience in the restaurant business.
“I did it because there was nothing else I could do but cook,” Mary told us 25 years ago. “I could not even type and I had never held a job outside the home in my life. I had to go to work to pay the bills though and I was terrified to go on a job interview, which I had never done, so I figured I’d open a restaurant.”
Despite this less than auspicious track record, Bentley managed to develop the Greenhouse into one of the Main Line’s most elegant and successful restaurants for two decades….After Mary’s departure, the property was converted into another restaurant (Carolina’s) and then another one (Oyster Bar) which both lasted a little longer than a Caesar salad…..
Why so much on The Greenhouse and its history? Because it was an amazing restaurant. Today, if a restaurant like that actually existed, it would be amazing and what Mrs. Bentley did for Thanksgiving precisely was create your Thanksgiving dinner at her restaurant.
You would order an entire Thanksgiving dinner, including your own small turkey. When you had Thanksgiving there, you didn’t feel as much that you were in a restaurant, but it was like you were in somebody’s home. It was really terrific. I am not sure if any other restaurant in the area does it the way they used to. Being able to get in there for one of the Thanksgiving dinners was a big deal. And you got leftovers. 
I remember other Thanksgivings that we spent with my father’s sister and her family once they were permanently back in Philadelphia. Those were more formal Thanksgivings and not particularly warm and fuzzy because my father and his sister did not really get along. It was just a beautiful but cold house and having dinner with a bunch of equally cold people.
My aunt’s children, my cousins, were not friendly really towards us, they were polite… and you always got the feeling that they felt oddly superior to any of the rest of us. And it was a shame because my aunt had a beautiful house in Chestnut Hill and I loved her living room and dining room. Those Thanksgivings while they lasted also included my father’s mother, my grandmother as she moved in with them when Pop Pop died. These are the Thanksgiving memories that are like the echoes and empty rooms.
There was also one Thanksgiving or Christmas that we spent in Ellicott City Maryland, where one of my father’s cousins lived. They most had this amazing Victorian house that they restored and it was great. The holiday was also great because they were always warm and loving
Other Thanksgivings over the years were spent with friends and other family like my cousin Suzy. She and her family settled in Newtown, Bucks County, which was not too far from where some of my mother’s cousins and other aunts and uncles had lived .
Suzy was my mother’s brother’s oldest daughter. She was like a big sister to me and my sister. She had spent a lot of time with us growing up and when she got married, she actually got married out of my parents house in Society Hill and our parish, Old Saint Joseph’s.
I loved doing holidays with Suzy and her kids. She would also do things like have a Christmas caroling party in December and we would all go around her neighborhood in Newtown and we collectively had the worst voices, but we had so much fun. I used to go to the New Hope area flea markets with Suzy as I got older.
Sadly, Suzy is no longer with us, she died two years to the day after my father passed away.
Then eventually we were all doing other Thanksgivings. Sometimes in Philadelphia, or the Philadelphia area, and then after my sister and her family moved to New York, also up there.
I also have other memories of random Thanksgivings where I couldn’t get time off from work and had to work Black Friday. So I remember one year my parents went to Nee York to my sister’s and I went to Merion Cricket Club with my friend and her family because after everyone in that family stopped wanting to cook Thanksgiving, they started (like a lot of people) eating a club Thanksgiving dinner. Only the Thanksgiving meals at Merion never held a candle to the Old Greenhouse restaurant in Radnor. And you definitely didn’t have your own turkey.
I remember some Thanksgiving meals I didn’t like particularly which were in a prior life and a prior relationship where I would have to go to my ex’s sister’s in the Allentown area. And one reason why it was unpleasant is that is when my ex would have me as a captive audience in the car and would yell at me the entire way up. It was enough to give you holiday PTSD, and when you would get to his sister’s they would spend the entire Thanksgiving talking meanly about whoever wasn’t there, or about whomever was in the next room of her dark depressing town house.
And the ex’s sister had speckled brownish kind of Pfaltzgraff crockery plates that I thought were truly ugly, and they served the turkey to the table in giant tinfoil pans. I mean, it’s Thanksgiving. I get it people like to cook turkeys in disposable tinfoil pans, but you don’t bring those to the table. it’s a holiday. Bring out the dishes and platters. Maybe it’s just personal preference to me, but I always thought it was a waste. The best time I ever had there was the year his sister’s beagle got part of the turkey.
And it’s funny when we would go to his brother‘s house for a holiday, I would still get yelled at on the car ride up, but his sister-in-law and her mom really made an effort and said a beautiful table, and the house was just lovely and warm.
Those felt like the purgatory years. Thankfully, they came to an end. I don’t miss those years. They were neither super terrible or good. They were just a loop I was stuck in for a period of time.
Thanksgiving Day dinner is a meal I actually like cooking. It makes you crazy and it can be stressful, but I think it’s fun. I especially like it since I moved to Chester County because you can always get a fresh turkey easily.
I have enjoyed over the years, creating my own traditions. I like making cranberry sauce I like making chutney right before Thanksgiving when I have leftover green tomatoes and some apples and I love to bake. And one of the things I love best of all is ironing a vintage linen tablecloth, and setting a pretty table. We can’t take it with us so we might as well use our dishes etc. I really don’t like when people who have nice dishes and glasses and who don’t have the excuse of having small children, bring out the paper plates and plastic glasses. I think it’s kind of tacky.
Like any other holiday, it won’t necessarily be perfect. We don’t live a Hallmark Movie existence, after all.
We’ve had a year and now it’s time for the holidays. There’s always time for reflection and introspection as well. We should be grateful for the people we still have in our lives, and the ones who no longer are.
I go into the holidays missing a very important friend who died unexpectedly this summer. She would’ve been texting up a storm by now to find out what we were doing for Thanksgiving and what she was going to do, thousands of miles away. It makes me feel a little disconnected and right now kind of sad that the only conversations I will have with her about holidays going forward are just speaking into the air and wishing she was still here. I think going forward, I will probably always feel a little bittersweet, but I won’t have that sadness.
2024 has been a year of change for most of us, and I think it’s safe to say the future is uncertain in some regards. However, life goes on and a lot of what makes our lives our everyday lives doesn’t change. And we have to remember that.
I know there are some people who won’t be spending holidays this year with friends or family in some cases because of the election. There will always be more that unites us than divides us and we shouldn’t let political extremism on either side take over any further than it already has. And I’m not saying that because I’m good with the outcome of the election.
We don’t live in a Norman Rockwell illustration and we’re not the Waltons and John Boy won’t be necessarily home for Christmas, either. But the business of living has to be gotten on with. Life is never going to be completely static, nor should it be.
Some people tomorrow aren’t big fans of Thanksgiving for whatever reason, and I know some people who will be volunteering somewhere. It’s their way to give back. 
So whatever your jam is, I hope all of you out there have a happy Thanksgiving.
When your friends are on a committee, you buy tickets.
When your friends are on a committee for a holiday house tour and Christmas is a favorite season, you buy tickets.
When your friends are on a committee for a holiday house tour and it benefits one of your favorite local nonprofits and helps seniors, you also become a sponsor.
So yes, I am personally on the sponsor list for the 2024 Surrey Holiday House Tour & Shop. Now I can’t be a big platinum sponsor, but I joined in where I could.
Surrey Services is a very special nonprofit to us in our house, so this is a pleasure all the way around.
Jim Devine Photography Photo
I am so excited for this year‘s tour and it’s Friday, December 6 and those tickets sell out fast that is not just hype. They literally fly out the door.
Tickets go on sale tomorrow morning October 2nd.
Again, tickets are live TOMORROW !
Start your countdown…⏰
Visit SurreyServices.org to purchase your tickets for our Holiday House Tour. Tickets are $95 per person and include a box lunch.
And the shops which are open to all? They are amazing! They have tons of vendors and my friend, Eddie Ross, who is also Volunteer Chair of this event, will be a vendor this year as well. If you have ever gone to his sales at his studio, I need to say no more, he has fabulous taste. And he loves Christmas as well! We share a love of old German kugel ornaments and glass icicle ornaments – as a matter of fact, he gave me these wonderful vintage glass icicle ornaments last year for Christmas that I can’t wait to put on the tree this year!
You KNOW you want to go!!! Come on now, let’s sell this event out and raise lots of money for Surrey. There are very few events I support at this point and this is one of them so I hope you will join all of us. It’s a wonderful day!
