Category Archives: Life

influencers or just social media narcissists?

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I will preface this entire flowing stream of perhaps random thoughts and consciousness with yes, more people post on social media than not. This is not about the average everyday folk who post and use social media to stay connected to those perhaps living far away, or locally connected for whatever reason. I am talking about the incessant public look at me and my fabulous self posters….it’s not about doing good or even sharing is caring. I am talking about social media narcissism.

Yes, 2024 means we still have too many “influencers“.

I’m going to be honest maybe it’s me and I’m just getting too damn old but I don’t understand influencers any more than I understand overly trendy, which is something I have never gotten. What do they actually do except post pictures of themselves? Do you buy something because they talk about it on social media? Do you go to a restaurant because they went to it and took a picture and you’re not sure if they actually ate anything?

And we’re talking about random areas, not merely Los Angeles or New York City. So when you see these people sometimes you really want to reach into your phone or computer screen and virtually shake them because they don’t get that fashion is not merely putting on a designer label or something expensive. Part of what makes fashion fashion is style and most of them do not have either that or a good full length mirror. But then you realize narcissists aren’t probably going to listen to anything you say anyway so you have a good giggle and make a mental note for that old Glamour Magazine “don’t” column where they put a black box across faces for the magazine column.

Some of my favorites are the Instagram shots of those “influencers” who have these almost glassy eyed professionally bored shots playing with their food somewhat unnaturally. Do they actually like the food or is it just a shot for followers? Do they also not get that you can’t just squeeze a hat on one’s head like the lid to your Dutch oven?

Or the megawatt bad descriptive adjective laden shots of self proclaimed “public figures.” Everything is amazing and they have goals of removing toxic people from their lives but what will happen if they look in the mirror? Will said mirror crack and does it have a warranty?

And then there are all the lifestyle “influencers.” I’m wondering whose lifestyle they are influencing because I’m thinking their taste is all in their mouth most of the time. Even I know that looks I rocked at 25 don’t belong on my middle-aged self. I also know if I couldn’t wear something in my 20s I definitely couldn’t wear it in my 50s.

I don’t pretend to be an interior designer or an actual lifestyle or fashion expert, but I know gaudy and ostentatious when I see it, or just cheap. I do actually know some of those who are the real deal and I appreciate them. Of course they feel no need to bombard you with anything. They quietly show you what they’re doing and put it out there. And usually it’s a lesson in less is more.

If you are somewhat of a fireplug shape, you also shouldn’t wear what they keep calling ball skirts on Instagram. And for the record they’re not ball skirts. They look like the tulle undergarments that used to go under the skirt of a ballgown to give it extra fluff and body, but what would some of those people know from actual ballgowns? It’s like I thought wearing your underwear on the outside went out with Madonna’s early videos, but what do I know? You can find these skirts on Anthropologie‘s website and really cheaply from places like Amazon and Temu. When I kept seeing them, I actually looked them up because I was tired of seeing social media “influencers” wearing them. I mean, barf, it takes the fun out of how those skirts were intended except to me they still look like slips, etc.

And then there are the socially aspirational, who consider themselves influencers, and I still wouldn’t pay any amount of money to have a meal with them. What makes them an expert? What do they actually know about wine or cooking or entertaining? Again, just because you paid a couple bucks for something doesn’t mean it’s fabulous. It’s like the people who take a gardening course, proclaim themselves “master gardeners” but don’t actually plant anything so why bother?

And these “influencers“ are all over the area. Even if you don’t follow them, they buy ads and they pop up in your feeds. All they do in my humble opinion is contribute to the extraordinary lack of reality on social media in general. And none of these people get that just because they take thousands of selfies and are constantly posting on social media, it doesn’t make them society. More like gauche and obnoxious and obvious.

Among my favorites are the occasional giggles watching a fish lips bunch pose for photos. The Botox collaborative who can’t quite smile naturally because they have frozen face syndrome.

I’ve basically said before that the concept of actual society in Philadelphia is basically dead. It truly is. It kind of is in other areas too. Probably because society wasn’t just posing for photos. Today the concept of it is closer to look at us, and Andy Cohen we are ready for our Bravolebrity Real Housewives close up.

Seriously, these perennial selfie posers just don’t understand is what they are doing is not actually society, it’s merely what they think it should be. These influencer types simply don’t get that was not what society used to be about. Yes, it was about pretty dresses and gracious living but those photos and those events? Good was accomplished and the actual event itself was always centerstage, and the nonprofit having funds raised for it.

And the thing about these old events is the actual media would be invited to events and they would be on a press list just like the guests were on a guest list. But it wasn’t garish and it wasn’t grotesque. And the gowns/dresses were awesome and they fit because after we bought them they were tailored as necessary.

When I started to see the influence of the new people in, shall we say…polite society…. it was at the Academy of Music, and it was Opening Night for The Philadelphia Orchestra, which used to be a big deal. There were young friends parties, (I was actually chair of Young Friends for The Philadelphia Orchestra for a few years) and there were varying levels of adult parties and people got dressed up. Beautiful black tie, and white tie that came out for the now defunct Academy Ball. Guests went to dinner, they came to the concert, and they knew how to behave.

“Back in the day” I was among other things Co-chair of the Young Friends of the Philadelphia Orchestra, Opening Night 1996. This was one of the Philadelphia Orchestra strike years. The concert was canceled, but the party went on. Ours that year was at the Rittenhouse Hotel. That was also the year the more mature ladies on the Opening Night Gala Committee tried to make us fold our party into the other two parties. We declined. Ours was the better party that night as was evidenced by the crashers from the other parties 🤣 including then Inquirer music critic Daniel Webster and then Society Editor David Iams. It was a fun night and I loved that dress. Of course it was when black tie was still truly elegant.

How I knew it was changing was when it started to get more corporate for a lack of a better description. People started bring alcohol in plastic cups into the interior of the Academy of Music, which is one of the oldest theaters in constant use in the country (doubled as a NYC theatre the series The Gilded Age in the recent season) and you’re not supposed to do that. These people were also talking during the performance and didn’t even turn off their phones.

That’s when I stopped going to a lot of those events. There were smaller events I would still go to after that, but today? I don’t find any joy in them so much anymore. I used to love them. It was so much fun getting dressed up, putting on a beautiful black tie dress or gown. It was kind of like living Cinderella moments . It was so much fun. Great people to talk to. But when it stopped being fun and people stopped volunteering for the right reasons, I decided I would find other things to do. You see, it got to the point where people wanted to have their name on an invitation, but not actually put in the volunteer hours.

And it’s gotten worse because last year I went to an event at the Kimmel Center, where someone took off their shoes and put their bare feet up on the backs of the seats in front of them. That was enough to make you vomit for sure.

The other thing is people stopped being able to have conversations at these events. It’s like with the onset of social media. People are no longer able to have actual conversations. It’s becoming a lost art form.

A friend of mine, who is a writer, said to me recently that she doesn’t go to a lot of these events that they are also inviting all the “influencers” to for just that reason. Basically, she said, you go to those events, and these people are only interested in two things: photos for their socials and talking about themselves. Other than that, for the most part, they’re kind of rude and dismissive. And manners are one of those things that transcend social classes and groups, you either have them or you don’t and today it’s more don’t than have. It’s kind of sad.

I could go on but I won’t. I realize life doesn’t exist in a bubble and things change and evolve, but sometimes things don’t change for the better. And for all the good that social media can accomplish, it seems to be that that the can do good aspect of it is more and more forgotten and I think it’s sad.

Enjoy the snow.

happy winter solstice 2023

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Happy Winter Solstice! It arrives at 10:27 PM EST , today December 21, 2023. This is the moment the exact moment the earth reaches its maximum tilt away from the sun.

Winter Solstice officially marks the shortest day and longest night of the year. From now on, the days become longer and nights become shorter.

The annual event is marked by winter traditions around the world, including parades, festivals, spiritual gatherings and other observances, and thousands of people flock to Stonehenge in England and other neolithic monuments.

So that’s it for me today enjoy the photos at the bottom that I have found along the way.

Grianstad Sona Daoibh or Happy Winter Solstice.

for christmas can pennsylvania please address “suicide bridge” aka the trestle bridge in downingtown, pa?

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I have written about this bridge before over the past few years. At the bottom of the post are the three posts I have written.

We all talk about this bridge, it’s incredibly historic and incredibly dangerous. See this video that is about a year old I just found:

I just can’t even with this. And I will tell you why. I know if people are set on ending their lives, they will find a way. But it seems to me there should be some way to secure this a little better?

I also found a video of kids climbing it:

Here’s a drone video:

There are actually a lot of videos about this bridge. It has undisputable history, and it is also a jumper location. Not being crass, but there is good reason why it is called suicide bridge.

I was told a couple of days ago that there have been TWO suicides, as in two new suicides here in the past couple of weeks or so. Please NOTE these aren’t all teenagers. That is incredibly sad.

This backs up what I was told in part:

Someone I was speaking with the other day said there have been at least 10 suicides in the last 7 years. I do know that only 2, yes 2 have been reported. No one wants to talk about suicide or mental health resources being in short supply, but how many suicides off of just this bridge alone before we have this conversation. I understand that Senator Carolyn Commita is rumored to be meeting with people about this from somewhere local supposedly this week, but is this something she will stick her neck out for?

And Governor Josh Shapiro seems to like grabbing headlines, so Governor Shapiro, how about grabbing a headline for good? After all I have also been told this abandoned/orphaned bridge is no longer under the not so watchful eyes of Norfolk Southern, but instead PennDOT so that brings responsibility all IN state, so hey how about it Governor Shapiro? Because I know how SLOW PennDOT is on orphaned bridges because I used to write about one that it took PennDOT over a decade to take care of. That is the Pennswood Bridge in Bryn Mawr. And this Trestle Bridge would be an actual emergency situation so if Governor Shapiro can waive a magic wand for I-95 bridges, why not here as a mitzvah for the holidays?

Below along with links of former posts on this bridge are screenshots I have taken of videos of this bridge. This bridge is dangerously decrepit up top, and it really doesn’t seem like there is anything much preventing people from getting up there.

Surely something can be done to remove the horrible reputation of this historic bridge?

What can YOU do? Contact politicians, Chester County officials, random PennDOT people and sign the petition isn’t a bad idea is it? Note that there are all sorts of PennDOT bridge etc. projects in the area and they all have project managers. Throw enough spaghetti against a wall and things stick right? We can hope it is the same with PennDOT… all we can do is try….public officials won’t care unless we show them WE care.

https://www.change.org/p/do-something-about-downingtown-s-trestle-bridge

Contact Governor Josh Shapiro https://www.governor.pa.gov/contact/

PennDOT Chester County Maintenance is right in Coatesville: Phone: 484-340-3200

PennDOT Engineering District 6 is in King of Prussia Phone: 610-205-6700

PennDOT Municipal Services Supervisor: Louis Calvanese, louicalvan@pa.gov, 610-205-6541

PennDOT Press Release Person/Media: Robyn Briggs, robbriggs@pa.gov (Her husband is State Rep Tim Briggs FWIW)

PennDOT Boot Rd Bridge Project Manager, Justin Gattorno Phone: 610-205-6693Email: jgattorno@pa.gov

PennDOT Doe Run Bridge Project Manager, Nathan Parris Email: c-nparrish@pa.gov

PennDOT Ship Road over Valley Creek Bridge Project Manager, Nicholas Macelko Email: nimacelko@pa.go Phone: 610-205-6529

​U.S. 322 (West Chester Bypass) Ida Slope Restoration Project Manager, Kalpesh Parikh Email: c-kparikh@pa.gov Phone: 610-205-6621

Call PA Senator Carolyn Comitta’s District Office 610692211                                  https://www.facebook.com/SenatorComitta  https://www.instagram.com/senatorcomitta/  https://twitter.com/SenatorComitta            
   Email her Chief of Staff Michael Hartman  michael.hartman@pasenate.com                                                              

Call Chester County Planning Commission 6103446285                   https://www.instagram.com/chescoplanning/?hl=en                    https://www.facebook.com/ccplanning/                                   

Email: ccplanning@chesco.org                                 

PennDOT (NEW owners of bridge) https://customercare.penndot.gov/eCCC/eCCC.nsf/m_Start.xsp

here we are again, what can we do?
norfolk southern needs to realize there are things we can change to make things better. (petition link attached)
norfolk southern please do something

are you there god? it’s not margaret, it’s the rest of us.

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I recently watched the movie version of the Judy Blume book, Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret. When the book came out, I was about the age of the main character, Margaret. I had just moved from the city to Gladwyne. I remember quite vividly it was like moving to a foreign country.

I remember everybody in seventh grade talking about the book. My mother wouldn’t let me read it, so of course I snuck / bought a copy. what I remember about the book most of the time is it kind of spoke to me because of the age. And also my being a new kid in a new community.

Moving to the Main Line wasn’t the easiest. Like Margaret, I had lived in the city so suburbia was truly alien to me at first. It was not that it was bad, it was beautiful but so different. You could open windows at night for one, and there were horses across the street, and down the road.

Making friends at almost 12 wasn’t as easy when you were a new kid trying to fit in with girls who were your grade but a year older and who have known each other since kindergarten.

Something that initially made it a little easier was that we lived close to a friend of my father’s from high school and he had a daughter my age. Because of her I did start to make friends but just like Judy Blume’s Margaret, I still struggled with my place in my new world. (And oh the parallels of my moving to Chester County in my late 40s and becoming a stepparent!)

Parts of the movie that were in the book so resonated once again included secret clubs of girls. I remember slumber parties where they tried to call up the spirit of Jim Croce on a ouija board.

And the whole bra thing. My sister who is 3 years younger than I is the one who decided we needed bras. I still remember my mother’s face when my then almost 9 year old sister announced we needed bras. Of course, neither of us actually did but much like the book/movie everyone around us had them.

And deodorant/antiperspirant. My friends used name brands back then like Secret. My mother came home with Tussy roll on. I hated that.

Sneaking to shave my legs the first time….and slicing the crap out of them. That was followed by a lecture from my father with how his mother never shave her legs. Of course that made me think of all those old Italian ladies his mother and my great aunts knew who tucked mint leaves under their arms in the summer and my 12 year old self wanted to die on the spot.

Ear piercing. I lost that battle. I actually got my ears pierced in the health center my freshman year of college. When I was 17.

When school started in 7th grade, I went from a room of not quite a dozen kids, to a huge public school junior high with a completely overwhelming amount of students. I went from a small school in the city to a huge school that was like a city in itself.

Settling in, the mean girls were the worst. Some I still see as pretty much the way they were then even if they are now 60. No, they aren’t still wearing their Candies with tight French jeans and crimping their hair, or at least I hope not. And I still remember exactly how miserable they were to me and others back then. Sometimes I have thought I should thank them because they helped make me able to stand up for myself.

I have seen some of the former mean girls over the years as they have passed. One thing that has always stuck with me is I thought they were ridiculous then, and to an extent, now. Some are actually almost mummified caricatures of their former 12 and 13 year old selves. File under karma baby, karma.

However do you know where the worst mean girls existed? St. John Vianney Sunday School in Gladwyne. There was a girl who was a year behind me that live the next street over who used to harass the crap out of me in Sunday school. And what was it over? Clothes my mother bought me that were similar to hers. Things like a jumper. A corduroy jumper.

One of my friends and I have spoken about these “Margaret years”. And while we all moved past those years, but some of the memories linger and pop up unexpectedly. And watching the movie did bring some of the memories back. Same era, age, situation…which is why I liked the book my mother didn’t want me to read back then.

Life for me changed for the better when I was able to get out of the Lower Merion School District Schools. When I went to Shipley, another world and path opened. And I was finally in a place where I felt I better belonged. Part of it was fairly simple in that I never thrived in large schools and that was OK.

I’m glad that book existed for us back then. It spoke to so many of us. Parents didn’t want us reading it because it was controversial to them and contemporary to us. That book was hard for our mothers who were literally born in a different world than the one they were raising us in.

So isn’t ironic today when we hear about people today trying to keep books contemporary to kids today from them? Only these people today scream and scream and scream. I’m glad our parents didn’t act like that. It was simpler: they said no, we snuck the Judy Blume books into our houses, and everyone survived. I don’t recall them being dissected and screamed about in PTA or school board meetings.

Maybe more should watch the movie adaptation of Are You There God? It’s Me Margaret. It still offers perspective. The years pass, the situations change, yet there is always commonality.

You see, much like with politics, with life in general past is prologue isn’t it? And that goes hand in hand with we can’t bury our history by pretending things didn’t happen because our history will repeat itself.

Thanks for stopping by.

dear qvc…

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Dear QVC,

I will admit I don’t understand the religion of the Q. I have ordered a few things over the years like a garden hat or a plant I wanted to try. I have darkened the doors of your outlet store in Frazer once in a while, mostly out of curiosity. So I am not a devotee, merely familiar.

But let’s dish a minute, shall we?

That billboard is atrocious and you are still in West Chester and a lot of your on air folks live local so we know unless they live under a rock, people HATE this billboard yet here you are contributing to distracted driving and presenting a danger to nature and migrating birds? This billboard can be seen from space, not just at the intersection of Route 29 and route 30 in East Whiteland Township, Chester County

Then there is your outlet store. First of all, you make enough money that it should look nicer inside for both the customers and more importantly, your employees. The Goodwill store that used to be in the shopping center was better put together and looked nicer than your store..

But there is another problem with your outlet store. And the problem is you don’t do anything about the customers going shopping in your store that park on the sidewalk and in the fire lane. Your customers are not the only guilty ones, the others are the ones going to pick up their bottles at the liquor store.

So since you got your start, and Chester county, one, would hope you would have a little more respect for the residents where you have your outlet store. Some retailers around here have discovered that advertising on giant billboards are bad for business. You have a cult like following, so most likely you won’t have that problem, but there are the optics to be considered.

Stop being a bad neighbor, QVC.

love is a flower and you have sown the seed

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This is art history for me. The art history of my kid years. My friend Carolyn is selling her parents’ house in Philadelphia as her life is elsewhere. Both her late parents were heavily involved in the arts in Philadelphia. Her mother was “the quilt lady” of my childhood and I loved to watch her at the Head House Craft Fair. Recently, the lovely lady who was handling the disposition of things arrived with a box of treasures.

The first photo in this post is a wood block carving by Margery Niblock. I am thrilled this now lives with me. I think it’s so cool. Next is a poster from the Head House Crafts Fair.

The Head House Crafts Fair. It was such a wonderful event. Even though I was just a kid, i’ve never forgotten it. It’s kind of the thing I used to gauge I think subconsciously craft and community fairs. The artisans were amazing at this fair. And a lot of them were friends of my parents, and my mother is one of the key people who put it together after Margery Niblock said it would be a great idea. And my friend Carolyn’s mom was “the quilt lady.”

So these are amazing gifts and mean a lot. It’s funny how decades have gone by, and I can still see, feel, and hear the sounds of this craft fair in the Head House Shambles in my head. I remember that Margery Niblock, and some of the other artists had their work hung on clotheslines quite literally. And you were just see them a little bit in the breeze. It was very cool. And there weren’t just crafts people and artists there. There were antique dealers with treasures for all pocketbooks, and there were workshops for kids that were really cool and not dumb downed stuff with Play-Doh. And there was all sorts of food, representing many different cultures.

People undoubtedly think that all of us Society Hill kids of this mid-60s to mid-70s era are a little nutty because it was kind of cool to be a kid there then. It was a more innocent an era for kids, for sure. It’s not like life was perfect and that there weren’t kids dealing with crazy family stuff because that’s any era at any time, but there were truly good and fun things like this crafts fair. Or going to Old Swedes (Gloria Dei) for Santa Lucia…and back then they used real candles.

Also in the gift box of memories were a whole slew of unframed Margery Niblock prints, and a couple of the prints were framed. And there was a poster of the craft fair and the marvelous poster of a slightly later vintage designed for the Pennsylvania Horticultural Society in 1989. This was the year Margery also won a garden contest of theirs. A couple of years ago, the Pennsylvania Horticultural Society discontinued their home gardeners gardening contests, which I think it’s a pretty poor decision, and it kind of has made me lose interest in them along with some other factors.

https://margeniblog.typepad.com/margery_niblock_/2006/08/frogs_in_my_gar.html

Related: https://societyhillcivic.org/foundation/wp-content/themes/BoilerSplatV2/newsletter/1976/1976-12.pdf

https://margeniblog.typepad.com/margery_niblock_/2007/02/city_hallphilad.html

https://octobergallery.com/2017/10/27/112929/

This was a beloved time capsule entrusted to me as the next steward of it. I accept that responsibility with a glad heart. It’s art and memories I love and the work of an artist that means something to me.

Another amazing thing included with what was gifted to me was a small quilt made by Carolyn‘s mother. It’s a pattern similar to what I was photographed watching her make that day all those decades ago.

Also included? An amazing piece of an old quilt framed. I am sure this was a quilt that Carolyn‘s mother discovered somewhere that was too old to repair so she took the corner of the quilt that had the signature on it and framed it….from 1843.

In a time when people just throw good art away, I am both lucky and grateful that one of the former league of original Society Hill- St. Peter’s kids. And the thing about art is it doesn’t have to be priceless, it just has to resonate with you. If you go to charity sales, or flea markets, there is a lot of art that needs adopting. Adopt a piece today!

Thanks for stopping by.

life….people…etcetera

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Some may consider this post a giant word salad. To me it’s just a collection of things, I have been observing and thinking about for almost a couple of weeks now.

Social media is literally the most fascinating, sociological character study of human nature and behavior that exists.

People want you to only believe their opinion matters. Even if you disagree with someone, the art of conversation is quickly disappearing. Especially online because you’re looking at words on a screen. Sometimes you can get with the emotion behind the words are but a lot of times you can’t, and it can always be a different interpretation because it’s words on a page and people see things differently.

But it’s all how they translate those words, right? Because no human voice means lots of room for interpretation, right?

One example is billboards as an issue are heating up again in Chester County. And I had this crazy interaction with this woman recently who couldn’t just disagree with other people’s positions, she was pretty ignorant about the thoughts of others. And this is someone who is asking for people to help her out with a project of hers on social media that is a business of sorts and she’s very public about it. But she’s one of these people that has to have the last word even when she’s a guest somewhere. And hey, if that’s her jam, that’s fine. But it doesn’t mean that I have to listen.

And that’s one of those things that is so frustrating about social media. Sometimes you just have those who drown out all of the other voices in an online conversation. Or anytime anyone disagrees with you or you them, they tell you that you are a bad person. When did not being a mirror image of everyone else become bad? Different = bad? We are all sheeple on the social media bus?

Speaking of sheeple let’s address the oh they are tops in their field because a magazine says so. Does anyone remember the who’s who books and directories of years gone by? You may have been chosen, but you pay for the privilege / listing. Same thing today with magazines.

Justin Volz, special to ProPublica

I’m a Journalist. Apparently, I’m Also One of America’s “Top Doctors.”

Companies cash in by calling physicians “Super Doctor,” “Best Doctor” or “Top Doctor” and then selling them opportunities to boast about the honor. Experts call the accolades a “scam.” Giving me one highlights the absurdity.

by Marshall Allen Feb. 28, 2019, 5 a.m. EST

My eyes narrowed when the woman on the voice message told me to call about my “Top Doctor” award.

~ Read more here: https://www.propublica.org/article/top-doctors-award-journalist

Sorry not sorry, had to get that out there because these top categories like the who’s who listings. People are asked but they pay for the privilege so isn’t it really just like an ad or marketing buy? ( See this link HERE for example.)

Yep this post is indeed jumping around.

I’m also always amused with who decides to hate me as a blogger. I make no secret of this.

This week I had this woman do the proverbial slide into my DM‘s. It was to tell me that I was a terrible horrible person and I was also not the right kind of breast cancer survivor. She did this shaming thing one time before, and I had forgotten about her because the insipid always fade away. Then this chick surfaced again, and was obsessive this time to the point where she contacted a friend of mine at 1:20 AM. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised because she contacted me that same overnight timeframe at 2:20 AM, where unless you are bat or on an overnight shift you should be asleep, or at least not sending people messages.

And that seems to be a growing trend, which is equal parts pathetic and disturbing. If you don’t like something that someone says on social media, you can’t just let it go or comment back, that’s too normal. In fact, these people are seeking out friends of whomever they don’t like saying something or that person themselves and private messaging. This woman this week in particular is perpetually the flying monkey of others. But she also seems to have a lack of self-awareness that what they’re doing is pretty freaking strange.

Speaking of strange recently, I heard from someone I literally have not heard from in a year. And it really was a not to say “hi” it was because they needed something from me. That’s actually hurtful. It make one feel like they are no longer an actual friend. Normally I’m happy to do things for people but when an entire year has gone by, it makes it a little difficult, or at least for me. And I realize life gets busy and time passes before you even know it, but still.…it hurts because it makes you feel like a use not a person. And I don’t even know if I’m articulating that properly.

I think it’s kind of a simple thing: when you make yourself available to people, who are your friends whenever they need somebody to talk to. You do it with a glad and open heart. After all, it’s a friend it’s someone you care about. And you don’t help your friends or listen to your friends because you’re keeping book. It’s not a tit for tat of I did this now you should do X. But it is a question of mutual consideration sometimes, I guess is the best way of putting it. It’s just one of those things in life that sometimes feels a little unfair. It’s not terminal to a friendship per se, but it makes you hit the reset button for a little while. And I think that’s OK.

But I think in general, the world’s gotten kind of scrambled in the past few years. I wish I could just say it was Covid, but I think it’s a lot of things rolled into a big ball of messy. I don’t think social media necessarily makes it better to you? I can’t really decide. I mean, it’s great that you can stay connected to people you wouldn’t normally be able to stay connected to easily, but then it’s the consideration of are we too connected? Are some of the mysteries of life just gone forever?

And the people still obsessed with the Main Line. They still don’t get that even though it’s the nouveau Main Line and not the old Main Line, they still kind of have to be invited into certain circles. And it’s painful to watch.

In other hands-down welcome to the occasional bizarro world this week was a conversation with a local police department, that was not my own. This very nice detective called to tell me that they were closing the investigation on me and I hadn’t done anything wrong. Of course, I didn’t actually know someone was investigating me.

Why you ask, would somebody be investigating me? Has to do with a public figure which is what is even crazier.

Why?

Because it seems a little crazy that you have someone who says they are a public figure, and behaves in the matter of a public figure, wanting to be an influencer or something, who called this police department when essentially they want people to look at them all of the time? They called this police department essentially because they didn’t like something I said, as a blogger about something things posted publicly. Again this is a person who operates as a self proclaimed, public figure. And then, of course, there is that pesky little thing called the First Amendment, right?

Part of this scenario involved pointing out what looked like another Facebook account with their posts on it. So I literally said either they got hacked/cloned or they created another profile with their stuff on it and why? Will I admit, I was slightly sarcastic about it? Yes, but that’s not a problem or illegal. It’s opinion/amusement. And if someone was truly impersonating them, say thank you for pointing it out. But no, I was accused of creating that odd public profile.

Obviously, I didn’t.

And think about it logically: if you were going to go out of your way to create a fake public profile on a public figure would you tell everyone? I hate to break it to this guy, but I create fan pages on saving farms and historic houses and historic sites. Not people.

So this person, a public figure, who self brands as a public figure, who posts pretty much public everything except perhaps changing the toilet paper roll, has come a wee bit unglued in my opinion. Also perfectly legal. They went on to tell this nice detective that I had been essentially bothering his family too? I don’t know his family, and people who know me, and who have known me as a blogger know that one of the things I don’t is talk about someone’s partners, spouses, or children. And again, this is a person who lives life out loud publicly on social media as a public figure, including photos of their minor aged children. Even a lot of the people in Bravo’s reality franchises don’t post things about their kids all of the time.

So now, as I end the week, people are discovering if they choose to like my blog’s social media on Facebook, this public figure blocks them? Has Facebook definitely become the battles of middle school lunch tables? You can know them on social media, but you can’t like my posts? Is this for real or is this a coincidence or just pretzel logic? And even if it is for real it’s not the real world we should be living in is it? People you do what you want. I don’t see social media as a popularity contest.

And these weird things don’t just happen to me although this week it feels like it. These things happen to lots of people out there. it’s the world we’re living in. So sometimes you just have to like ask yourself if we are better since the onset of social media or worse?

I don’t quite know where to go sometimes with what people post on social media. I am sure people feel the same about me at times. But I like to live in the real world, so when people question something I post, it’s often because it’s not their limited comfort level and/or it’s not happy enough and farting rainbows and unicorns and butterflies.

Another somewhat related segue…. like little things I miss. For example, don’t you miss the art of real letter writing, and even thank you notes? Do you remember growing up and being excited to get a letter? Or feeling touched that someone cared enough about something you did to send you a note or perhaps a thank you note? It’s like with the onset of social media, those things don’t happen anymore. And I’m sad because I still like stationary. I still use stationary.

Other things I miss is being able to have conversations with people and even if you are on the opposite sides of an issue, it’s still a great conversation and you walk away friends. Now it’s whoever gets all the toys wins, and you even see that reflected in our politics from the most local of races and issues through to Washington DC. It’s not and never will be a recipe for success IMHO.

It used to be that people did things they felt were meaningful because it was the right thing to do. Not because they wanted people to adore them on social media, and the reality is the quiet doers of this world are still out there, but they don’t post about it on social media.

I’m thinking all of us should do a social media detox once in a while. Just take a time out not because anything is wrong and we know we really won’t suffer from FOMO fear of missing out. Use that time to check in with your friends in real time. Take a walk work in the garden look up at the sky and admire life. Get fresh perspective. Cook something. Go shopping just because.

Just get off of the hamster wheel.

TTFN

oh goody another billboard application for east whiteland said NO resident ever….

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Too much? I don’t think so. How many of these GIANT ELECTRONIC OUTDOOR TV’s are supposed to light up our nights? We aren’t I-95. But now Outfront Advertising wants us to think so.

Yes, that is right, ANOTHER billboard application has been filed in East Whiteland Township. Another kill the trees for the Route 202 billboard. The application says 103 Feet East of Mill Lane.

To be clear, because I may not be being clear, this M-700 Application by Outfront Advertising AKA BILLBOARD COMPANY is to REMOVE and potentially unnaturally trim 150 year old sycamore trees not a brand new billboard per se. It FEELS like a new billboard because they are the successor owners to Catalyst. Catalyst had previously filed an M-700 with PennDOT after killing a slew of trees and then there was serious community uproar, and then before a decision was ultimately made if I recall correctly, the application was withdrawn and then the site flipped from Catalyst to Outfront.

This is next to a PARK and residents, as in real affected people. Like last time, it would be a heinous act with environmental, highway, and residential impacts. We are an area that floods now and badly with every heavy storm. Tree removal = more erosion and other impacts with stormwater impact. Overall environmentally this is bad and these are OUR heritage trees. Why do we have to lose more heritage trees in our communities for billboards? Scenic highways, would that be so bad? Less distractions, being more environmentally friendly?

East Whiteland Township is OPPOSED to this new application.

But East Whiteland needs your help, especially but not limited to residents. If you travel this stretch of Route 202 regularly, PLEASE take the time to contact PennDOT and CC: Scott Lambert, Chair of the East Whiteland Township Supervisors. I will provide some lovely email address I have looked up in a moment, but you can also report your concern via their Customer Care Center: https://customercare.penndot.gov/eCCC/eCCC.nsf

YOU MUST BE POLITE AND PROFESSIONAL, NO PROFANITY PLEASE.

Email addresses:

Scott Lambert, Chair East Whiteland Supervisors: slambert@eastwhiteland.org

Slifer, Joanne: joslifer@pa.gov

Altemose, Darren: daaltemose@pa.gov

Wilcox, Owen: owilcox@pa.gov

At the end I will embed the actual documents I received on a Right to Know. But now a word about billboards as an issue. EVERY SINGLE TIME the issue comes up, the knee jerk response is “get rid of all of the elected officials.”

It’s not that simple, people, and neither should any of you be when it comes to this.

And you know, as well as I do that things with development are not always so simplistic because of the municipalities planning code. Billboards also come in to play with that, because if Pennsylvania had a more strict or defined policy about billboards as a state, it would have a trickle down effect to local zoning, and Pennsylvania kind of looks the other way which is why I am FOR different State Representative representation here for example. State Representative Kristine Howard does not do much of anything and does not have a voice for her constituents. We now have Katie Muth as our State Senator and I don’t know enough about her to have an informed opinion. At this point other than from what I have seen, she does stand up for her constituency, depending upon the issue. Maybe she will show an interest in helping save communities against billboards, or one can only hope.


You all know how I feel about billboards. I’ve never made a secret of it and I’ve been parts of groups fighting billboards since billboards were first proposed around 2010 in Bryn Mawr on Lancaster Avenue.

When billboards first became an issue in East Whiteland, some of the community were all gung ho, and formed a no billboards group. But those people soon fizzled out and didn’t go to meetings they weren’t speaking up and it was just left to a few people. People are not consistent with participating where they live. And everybody has a different reason, but the thing is people have to pay attention to the meetings and the schedules and what’s being submitted and it’s all there as public information. With regard to township meetings you can also attend them on zoom from the comfort of your home. You don’t have to be in person anymore and if you can’t attend them on zoom, you can watch them after on YouTube but people have to participate. Consistently.

Part of the problem is that more residents need to get involved where they live — as in East Whiteland and elsewhere. We can’t blame government for our lack of participation where we live.


When these billboards first came up the threat of the expense of prolonged litigation was real (look at Haverford Township and Lower Merion for real world examples.) This was like the one billboard that the billboard guy really wanted, but he had proposed three, so it was either they were going to accept this one billboard and the other billboards would go away or there would’ve been three like this within a mile and a half to 2 miles. People will have to go back and look at the original submissions. (http://www.eastwhiteland.org/418/E-Whiteland-Outdoor-LLC-Off-Premises-Sig )

Now I will admit that I think they could have said no, but the township felt compromise was in everyone’s best interest. Of course we now know how obnoxious that sign is, so perhaps that sign can be revisited by PennDOT and East Whiteland?

Once again, I ask people to start bombarding state elected officials, including the freaking governor to update the Municipalities Planning Code to protect where we live. It requires them to enact an act of the state constitution to do this, and they’re all too damn lazy to do it and this has to be done in Harrisburg. We need a top down STATE law solution to SAVING our communities from billboard blight.

I just don’t want people throwing the baby out with the bathwater because not all elected officials are bad. And we need to come together on this issue for real. Again.

From 2020: Billboard Battle Rages in Bryn Mawr

https://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news/local/billboard-battle-rages-in-bryn-mawr/2272642/

Here are the documents I have to share below. I am also sharing something from Scenic America. I don’t pretend to have the answers but please contact PennDOT. Time is of the essence. If you have media contacts, please impress upon them to cover this.

Saying NO to billboards IS possible. It doesn’t happen often enough, but it does happen. Phoenixville did it in 2012, remember? And a Chester County Judge upheld that decision in 2014. And special counsel to Phoenixville then is now a judge…Anthony Verwey. And Tredyffrin won their case this year saying NO to a billboard on Lancaster Avenue in Paoli.

https://law.justia.com/cases/pennsylvania/commonwealth-court/2023/1305-c-d-2021.html

Stronger together, people. Fighting billboards is not the purview of any political party. This is a non-partisan we live here but the billboard companies don’t live here kind of an issue. This is purely a We The People thing. Please stand up and be heard.

Together we can save 150 year old trees. Hopefully we can someday save our communities completely from billboard blight. But we can only do that as unified communities across Pennsylvania.

#billboards=blight

#nomorebillboards

#savethetrees

Phoenixville Says NO To Billboards
Judge-rules-for-Phoenixville-in-billboard-case-2014-–-Daily-LocalDownload
Letter-RE.-OAD-Permit-06-4133-03652775x9DAE0Download

9-13-23-email-from-Outfront-with-attached-M700-Application-03652749x9DAE0-1Download
scenic20america20billboard20fact20sheet1Download

random thoughts before an ophelia weekend

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Well I did unleash the flying monkeys according to some yesterday. So sad, too bad.

Today I have been fielding an absurd amount of comments about that. And in one case yes, I was rude about it because this whole issue within a real issue pisses me off. People have become so self absorbed in this world that they often don’t get that sometimes you just need to let people simmer down when they are pissy. I would say today some learned that about me.

Let me break it down for y’all:

Those public meetings post-Cavalcante were designed so people could express HOW they felt. I expressed how I felt politely, and what I said was said calmly without rancor. I felt some of our public servants and prison board members could have been more visible. I said that because we elected them, and seeing them there even if they weren’t speaking during that time would have bought residents comfort. Even if it was law enforcement out there protecting us, many of those folks were not locals, so to see the ones we elected and recognized just from a visibility standpoint is calming. It makes people feel better in the midst of chaos. It’s common freaking sense, and IMHO part of the job they signed up for.

For expressing my opinion, as well as others expressing theirs, a couple of commenters decided to chide in the form of “education”. Those people have since contacted me. One I am fine with, the other not so much. Perhaps my feelings will change, perhaps not. Sadly, the still don’t get it wasn’t their job to womansplain or defend the honor of the CCDC to anyone there speaking. That is the job of elected officials and the prison board. Further and to the point, as Americans we do have those in alienable rights which allow us to address government and politicians to express ourselves. And these folks did this at a public meeting which means I am well within my rights to express my feelings on the topic. Truthfully, this all would have been over yesterday had they just let me be after venting my spleen on the topic.

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

~ First amendment/ Constitution of the United States

I do not pretend to be right all of the time, and even if it kills me I will own when I am not. But I was not wrong yesterday and we had the right to express ourselves freely in that forum if we were comfortable. I felt expressing what I said was important, and truthfully, I do not speak often at public meetings anymore. Which truthfully, many should be grateful for.

The overly politically correct world we live in mixed with all of the babble of misinformation we stumble across on a daily basis is almost depressing. I remember the good old days when we had magical things called conversations even at large in the community and even when we were on opposing sides of the conversation whatever it was. Now life has turned into this inexplicable race to be whomever gets all of the toys wins, and well people that is NOT working is it?

Sometimes I think people just like to suck all of the oxygen in the room in general. This has nothing to do with politics in particular. It’s just life. We can’t control those people, only ourselves, and well, I am a verbal person and sometimes I will indeed tell someone off. And that’s OK.

Life is hard enough without all of those who would tell us how to breathe every minute of the day.

I would like to share something else briefly. It’s a follow-up on the Hood Mansion in Montgomery County (Limerick Township.) I wrote about her the other day here:

warehouses proposed at a historic site…in limerick, montgomery county…crucial public meeting tuesday, september 19.

Now I would like to share an update from my friend Tyler Schumacher who has an update after the meeting this week – there are 120 days left to save the Hood Mansion and that area from mega warehouses –

I’d like to thank everyone who has supported me in this trying time with the Hood Mansion.

Many of you who know me well, understand the importance this building has to me.

I feel as though the Hood Mansion story is so heartwarming, yet so plagued with tragedy throughout its lifetime. I will admit this is long, but worth a read if you have the time.

John McClellan immigrated to this country at just 21 years old, raised 13 children, and made a name for himself selling wholesale grocery.

Fearing for his children’s health during the summer in Philadelphia when yellow fever was an issue, he bought this property and erected a mansion he designed himself, based off a home he admired as a young boy in Ireland. His family enjoyed many lovely summers there, and they were especially proud of their son, Washington Hood. A captain in the US army corps of engineers, and well accomplished.

Tragedy struck when Washington contracted a disease during his journeys, ultimately passing away from it at a young age. Heartbroken, John and his Wife interred him at the family crypt, located just near the mansion they loved and called home and erected a monument in his honor. John passed away less than a decade later, being interred with his son in the family crypt.

When all was set and done, 15 of the Hoods resided together in the family crypt within viewing distance of the home they all loved and cherished. The home passed through generations of Hoods until it ultimately had to be sold during the 30s when the Great Depression hit the nation. Luckily, one of the Hood daughters married into a wealthy family who purchased it.

Meanwhile, the Hoods still slept peacefully in their family crypt surrounded by those they loved and the place they cherished.

Tragedy strikes yet again, when a group of teenagers break into the crypt in the mid 30s, and take their beloved son Washington’s skull and use it as a prank on a local resident. Mysteriously, those teenagers passed in a freak car accident not long after.

Fast forward to the 1960s, and the entire crypt is desecrated. Grave robbers break in and steal anything of value left on the Hoods, topple the monument to Washington Hood, and scatter the bones around the crypt. Luckily, the caretakers of the mansion at that time moved what they could behind the home they cherished and reinterred them for safety.

Fast forward to modern day, and the Hoods are yet again to be destroyed in grand fashion as a developer has come in to destroy what is left of their legacy, and their love of family, and replace it with warehouses and a retaining pond.

Someone has to stand up for them, for their home, and for their legacy. They certainly can’t do it – and I’ll be dammed if I let it happen without giving it my every last bit of effort.

If you read this far – thank you. And thank you for supporting my work, and me for many years.

Godspeed, and let’s #SaveHood

The Hood Mansion is located at: 3223 Sanatoga Rd Pottstown, PA 19464

https://patch.com/pennsylvania/limerick/historians-citizens-want-historic-limerick-mansion-preserved

https://www.easternpapreservation.org/hood-mansion

Things like the Hood Mansion matter. Don’t let her get lost to bad development like Happy Days Farm in Exton will be. Hood Mansion is suffering the way Lionville Station Farm is, and Downingtown Area School District has the ability to change the fate of Lionville Station Farm and haven’t. I hope the negative election issue the DASD has created for themselves will be worth it.

This weekend we are being visited by a storm called Ophelia. She might be a real charmer. At a minimum she is messing with our weekend. The weather is already starting to change. I will close with Ophelia by the Lumineers.

Until we meet again.

just another raggedy post?

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I will freely admit I am a bit salty about Farmer in the Westtown Dell’s latest post. The message is clear even if that is not actually her intent: if you aren’t with her, you’re against her. So is it you can only worship, you CANNOT raise or voice concerns about how things look (you know like the mowing issues), and you can’t say anything else? If you do, is there a shade of shade of inference none too subtly that anyone who has anything other than glowing praise and accolades is a racist?

Come on, really?

See this Instagram post from 2 days ago:

From Farmer Jawn Instagram (Public Post) 3 Days ago

So yes I wrote a post about the way the place formerly known as Pete’s Produce looked. And this was after an email blast to her followers came out. And by her I am referring to Westtown’s New Farmer in the Dell, Ms. Barfield.

That email hit a bad chord in me. I felt as if those of us expressing concern were being chided for expressing valid concerns about how everything looked. Lady, it’s called communication and that is not necessarily one and the same as an Instagram post is it?

So I wrote about it and how I felt. It’s my right is it not? I was not being racist. But I had people saying I was and messages that were vile.

well…ummm….when you want to believe in someone and something but still you just…wonder.

So let’s back up (again.) When they first announced Ms. Barfield was the new farmer, I was welcoming with a couple of basic questions – essentially concerning the Pete’s workers who had worked that farm for in some cases, years, and would she be hiring any of them. Here verbatim is what I said at the time (December 9, 2022) :

I welcome a new farmer to continue the tradition of Pete on this land. BUT with Pete, retiring, a lot of his workers are now unemployed, so I hope since so many of them worked so hard for him for so many years that this new farmer will adopt some of his workers as hers. What I am hearing Westtown School is that might not be so?

FarmerJawn is expanding their agriculture access vision into Chester County

Truthfully, I thought it was kind of cool initially when she was chosen because she was a female farmer. I did not object to the switch to organic farming, but I will still repeat what I initially said because I know organic farmers: it is a BIG process. Going organic and getting organic certification is a lot of hoops, and expensive. I also noted it doesn’t happen overnight.

These are a sampling of the 250 comments on the Instagram post that I found distasteful:

BUT I have a huge problem with the way I feel those of us out here who are essentially being told we are racists because we asked what was going on over there and can anyone understand this? That is wrong. I am not a racist and I have read through all of the 277 comments (or that was how many at last count.) Just because someone is not your race and says “hey I don’t like something happening” that is not racist. People aren’t saying because she is a black farmer or even a female farmer that she is bad or can’t do the job. They are also NOT saying she shouldn’t own farm land. Out here specifically people were referring to how run down parts of the property looked because the freaking weeds weren’t cut along the sides of the road leading into the market area. Sometimes things are just about what people say. Sometime it’s not more or bad or wrong.

People did try to have a conversation about this on this Instagram post. Like one lady said and I quote:

I find what bothers me the most is that conventional farmers such as Pete and others are made to sound as if they are horrible stewards of the earth. I wish you the best but please respect all farming practices. There’s nothing unhealthy about the soil on that farm.

One of the replies this person received was horrible. She was told she had white logic essentially and what the offensive same hell does she mean? Just like the subsequent comment to someone else asking about “your species”? I am sorry was this person an alien?

And then there are the locals who feel they have to literally suck up and say that they are so sorry everyone is so negative and change doesn’t come easily and please forgive everyone for the negativity. The negativity is primarily coming from the supporters of Farmer Jawn. And yes, I agree change doesn’t come easily. But it’s all about how the change is presented.

Let’s review: when Westtown first announced the new farmer of that land people were excited. The land would stay farmed and not become a crop of cheap plastic mushroom houses. Then it was nothing really, including the weeds which didn’t get cut for months. That made people wonder and worry, myself included. I was not racist on my comments and am not a racist but yeah I am damn straight going to react to words like raggedy. And when I have never made the race or sex of this farmer (or any other farmer) an issue, why is she saying that is why people are asking questions?

Newsflash, Ms. Barfield, people asked questions and had understandable concerns considering how well tended the land had been by the last steward of the land even if he wasn’t organic. I will note he wasn’t exactly a straight Round Up farmer, either. He was just a conventional farmer, not organic. But for what it is worth conventional farmers I know do employ a lot of organic practices even if they do not have the organic official status because of the expense of becoming certified organic. This farmer could have played this straight and allayed fears people had. But she really has not in my opinion. And that is why I am finding this Instagram you did offensive to those of us who live here.

And that is the thing of it: you are the new steward of the land but you are unknown except for your social media out here in the community you are entering into. And you have kind of been putting this combative vibe out there. It’s not warranted. Life is difficult enough at times without that. Just because I am white doesn’t make me a bad person does it? So why would you assume I judged you by the color of your skin? I didn’t. And I won’t.

Ms. Barfield. I do not have a problem with either your mission or your vision. I do still wonder if the Westtown land will be too much and too expensive for you long term, but that isn’t wishing you ill or implying you can’t do it. I am not slamming you as a female farmer of any creed or color. What I have a problem with is anyone implying folks have a racial angle if they ask questions about your Westtown farming. That will not engender good will in the community you wish to be a part of.

Farming like gardening is kind of like life, especially when you are cultivating. Because lady, people require cultivation too. I was planning to show up and support you when you announced your August 18th opening. I was happy to hear this. But then came your Raggedyness post on Instagram and those comments. Now, I will get there when I get there.

My business in particular doesn’t matter a hill of beans, and I know that, but what I am saying that may resonate, is that if we had questions or reservations at all, are we really actually welcome as potential customers?

A customer wants to feel welcomed. That’s a pretty simple tenet of customer service.

Ms. Barfield, FarmerJawn, I wish you the best, but I am never one who will mince words when something strikes me as wrong or unfair.

Wishing you all peace.

NBC News 5/14/23