Category Archives: family and friends

scrooge, still a timely character. file under: life lessons for christmas.

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Ebenezer Scrooge. One of the most remembered characters in literature. Created by Charles Dickens in the 19th century for A Christmas Carol.

A Christmas Carol was published December 19, 1843. 179 years ago this year. And the characters are still relevant today…179 years later.

The most recognizable and remembered of the characters is Scrooge. Also his clerk, Bob Cratchit. In his time Bob was the symbol in Victorian England of the overworked, essentially abused working class person. Long hours, low pay. The irony of course? This also sounds like today, doesn’t it?

In a Christmas Carol the Ghost of Christmas Present debunks Ebenezer Scrooge’s “un Christian” beliefs on religion and the “sabbath” in the context of business. This ghost also talks about how many people who claim a religious justification for their actions, yet in reality live literally not getting or caring about the true meaning of Christianity. Sort of a do as I say, not as I do thing and utter hypocrisy. Now today, we experience that hypocrisy of true Christians every day. You know like Stepford Wives for Totalitarianism and their ilk?

In any event this ghost thinks man should judge morality by the deed, not by how a man doing describes/labels his actions. Under the robe of the Ghost of Christmas Present are two ragged spirit figures. They are supposed to be like starving children.

The identities of the sprit figures are “Ignorance and Want.” I have never been sure that was other than the proverbial metaphorically speaking of it all: this ghost cares for these children because society, or man, should care for ignorance and want always, and not just talk about it. For the good of mankind.

There are some on this earth of yours… who lay claim to know us, and who do their deeds of passion, pride, ill-will, hatred, envy, bigotry, and selfishness in our name, who are as strange to us and all our kith and kin, as if they had never lived. Remember that, and charge their doings on themselves, not us….they cling to me, appealing from their fathers. The boy is Ignorance. The girl is Want. Beware of them both, and all of their degree, but most of all beware this boy, for on his brow I see that written which is Doom, unless the writing be erased.

~ghost of christmas present in a christmas carol

I started thinking about the metaphors in Dickens’ A Christmas Carol again a few years ago, when I read this article in The Guardian, a U.K. paper. I was able to find it again:

The Guardian: Ignorance and Want: why Charles Dickens’s A Christmas Carol is as relevant today as ever

By Chris Priestley
Wed 23 Dec 2015

A Christmas Carol is actually life lessons wrapped in a Victorian Christmas story. Allow me to liberally quote an article by a professor at Indiana University named Richard Gunderman in a publication called The Conversation:

…The story begins on Christmas Eve. The “grasping, scraping, clutching, covetous old sinner” Ebenezer Scrooge is toiling in his office, where he turns away two fundraisers seeking to provide for the poor, rudely rebuffs his nephew Fred’s invitation to Christmas dinner and berates his underpaid clerk, Bob Cratchit, for expecting to get Christmas Day off with pay.

At home that night, Scrooge is visited by the ghost of his partner Jacob Marley, who “died seven years ago, this very night.” Now wandering the earth dragging heavy chains forged by his own avarice, Marley warns Scrooge that he will meet the same fate if he does not listen to the three spirits who will visit him during the night.

The first of the spirits, the Ghost of Christmas Past, takes Scrooge to scenes from his earlier life, where he is reminded that he was once a kinder and gentler person….

he reexperiences what it is like to be lonely at the holidays until he is rescued by his sister. He then visits the holiday party of his employer, Mr Fezziwig, who despite modest means embodies the spirit of celebration.

He then sees his younger self with his fiancée Belle, to whom he intended to devote the rest of his life, until he was gradually overmastered by the love of money. Belle eventually breaks their engagement and marries another man, whose large and happy family Christmas the ghost takes Scrooge to witness.

The Ghost of Christmas Present whisks Scrooge to celebrations of Christmas in different settings throughout the land. They then travel to the home of Fred, who valiantly defends his uncle against criticism, choosing to pity rather than condemn him. Then Scrooge finds himself at the modest holiday feast of the Cratchit family, where he meets Tiny Tim, their ailing youngest child, and learns that unless the course of events changes, this will be the boy’s last Christmas. Finally, the ghost shows Scrooge two starving children, Ignorance and Want…The ghost of Christmas Yet to Come transports Scrooge to the holiday one year later, where he witnesses the reactions of various people to the recent death of a “wretched man.” A businessman states that he will attend the funeral only if a lunch is provided, and various people sell stolen items from the dead man’s estate to a fence. The only people who feel any emotion at his passing are debtors who now have more time to repay their loans. After returning to the Cratchit home, where Scrooge sees the family mourning the passing of Tiny Tim, he is taken to a neglected grave, where to his horror, he sees the name Ebenezer Scrooge.

Dickens was always about teaching us lessons. Read any article about A Christmas Carol especially, and you will see that it is a cautionary tale wrapped in a tale of redemption. Dickens refers to the lessons of the present to see the effects on the present and into the future. He also makes us think about how the past influences it all.

That should give you chills, because this is so very true today. And it’s that old thing about ignoring the past means we are doomed to repeat terrible things. That is why some history, although unpleasant, should not be made to disappear. Look what the dumbing down of America has currently given us. If we don’t persist in being and doing better, where will we all end up?

I have felt this way since before the onset of our COVID-19 world view existence. But COVID and the Trump years and Trump mentality have definitely thrown us into a post Victorian world that once again shows the vast chasms of life between the haves and the have nots.

We live in a world full of exceedingly selfish and mean people a lot of the time. That is not being a Debbie Downer, as anyone in corporate America and they will tell you it’s a harsh and true reality.

Take this time of the year, for example. It’s the time of year when employees receive year end bonuses. Only that is at the discretion, more like whim, of corporate overlords. I have remarked before about the year of the canned Polish Ham or a box of chocolates that then Prudential Securities offered hard working sales assistants, other support staff, and operations personnel in the early to mid 80s while the stock brokers all got fat, monetary bonuses. I know it happened, because I was literally there. Essentially all of the people who slaved to make brokers look good, got the short end of the stick. If you were lucky a broker gave you a monetary bonus, but it was not a requirement.

Total Scrooge moments, indeed back then.

Then there was always working in an office where the proverbial office pets got bonuses, and the rest? Nothing. It didn’t matter how hard you worked, you were just forgotten. You got to watch as others received bonuses, as you were deliberately overlooked. Yet another Scrooge moment, but then you figure Karma is a bitch and everything that goes around will come around eventually. The universe is funny and true that way. Oh wait, another Dickens lesson, correct?

And then there were the generous and kind bosses. I had a few of those over the years. They remembered Christmas and the actual spirit of the season. If not with a monetary bonus, then a nice gift. I wonder, do those bosses still really and truly exist?

But there will always be the bosses who will Bob Cratchit as many as possible, whenever possible. For them, it is always how much money they can make, and everyone else is well, kind of expendable. I do believe those people will indeed have a reckoning. We may never see it, but it will happen. These are a lot of the people who end up terribly alone…wait for it….like Ebenezer Scrooge.

The holidays are supposed to be pleasant, and while business might always be business, it seems like today more than ever you hear these tales of being Scrooged. And here we are supposed to be living in a world and a time where worker bees are supposed to be respected and have rights, but do they?

We will always live in a world where the next guy might have a lot more, or a lot less. But it’s all about how do we deal with this in our world, isn’t it? It’s also about being kind once in a while.

My critics like to tell me I am not kind. That I am mean. But am I really, or is it just about speaking my truth? That’s for them to figure out, incidentally. I know who I am, and my self-worth.

Now I know speaking my truth comes with a cost. My cost is corporate America. I am like a whistleblower after a fashion, so they will shun me until I am of retirement age. So it is a good thing I am content as being self-employed, a variation on a gig worker. I use my talents for various gigs of varying durations. I am not and will never be wealthy, but it has become enough. That probably makes some uncomfortable because I should want more. But what will more get me precisely?

When more becomes too much, and more of too much becomes the focus you get the Scrooges. Self focused, bullying, miserly, cold. No spirit of generosity. Lacking in actual joy about anything.

So sure, would it be nice to have more? Yes, because having a little more makes paying the bills easier. But our society has become one where we live seemingly only to work, and there is no balance. And those who crave balance, are often punished for that. If you think about it, we seemingly live in a world at times which punishes us for being happy or even wanting to be happy.

We all deserve to be happy, don’t we? So maybe we have to hit the pause button and reflect? We all struggle at times, right? So why can’t we reflect and be human and move forward?

Life is short. Re-read A Christmas Carol and learn from it. Hopefully it is not on a banned or book burning list somewhere. Life and Dickens, still true today.

Thanks for stopping by.

the musing season…

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You know how when you are watching a Christmas movies on TV they have the most picture perfect small (and snowy) towns with all sorts of decorations. And of course the Christmas parties are picture perfect and decorated to the nines with magazine photo worthy canapés.

Real life is a little bit different. We’ll start with how often do we get picturesque snowy Christmases do we have? And the holidays can be messy and not picture perfect although we love our Christmases. Or I do, you might not.

Recently friends of mine from high school pointed out the social media of someone we all once knew. The person is somewhat crackers now, and that’s being kind and perhaps it is a little sad, except I have run out of Christian charity with this one. She is currently posting photos from who knows where of houses she doesn’t live in, people she doesn’t know. But that is not so unusual for social media is it? Fantasy and smoke and mirrors.

My husband always says of me at Christmas that I stress myself out. Maybe I do sometimes, but it is only because I want to spread the magic of the season. I love Christmas and Christmas decorations and the memories they evoke.

This year I decided not to send as many Christmas cards. Why? Because of USPS. Recently I had a gathering for some of my female friends. Mostly high school. I mailed the invitations the first or second weekend in November. We realized that easily HALF of the invitations never reached people! A friend in Bryn Mawr literally did not get an invitation when another friend on the SAME street did! So I will send cards to those I received them from plus a few far away and hold my breath and hope for the best.

We always want that perfect Christmas. Even as a kid I remember that. But some years, that doesn’t happen.

One year, my father picked a tree with what only could be described as crooked. As in the trunk was totally crooked that my father had to lean it against the wall to get it to stand. Our house in Philadelphia had 14 foot ceilings on the first floor.

Then there was the year that kitty our cat got into her catnip stocking early, as in the WHOLE catnip stocking. There weren’t just zoomies, she drunkenly rocked the top of the Christmas tree baaaack and forth while we all prayed she didn’t bring the whole tree tumbling down.

Then there were the Christmases that kids probably loved more than adults. Like one Christmas when I was really little, and it snowed and snowed and snowed, and that is when we were still living in Society Hill, and the streets were quiet because they were so filled with snow, and there were no snow plows. I remember they stopped running at the trolley used to run down the middle of our street and I remember my mother pulling me in a sled along the track with me all bundled up in my little snowsuit, and then I tumbled into the snow and she didn’t realize it first. I was none the worse for the wear, but I think my mother startled the bejesus out of herself.

One of my favorite Christmas memories I have probably mentioned before. When I was really little, my father had a red VW bug with white interior. We would drive down to some railyard in Philadelphia to get a Christmas tree as they came off of the freight trains. It isn’t just the fact that my husband loves VW bugs that as an adult I have VW bug ornaments with Christmas trees strapped to the top. We did that, and then drove through snowy streets to bring the tree home.

Other Christmas memories include going to 9th Street, a.k.a. the Italian market. We would go to DiBruno‘s for cheeses and olives and pepperoncini and more. Then across the street and over to Cappuccio’s for a Christmas roast. Sometimes we stopped at Termini’s bakery, and the spice ladies. Now, with the spice ladies, you had to know how much you spent before you got to them because there wasn’t a cash register they just wrote everything up and if you weren’t paying attention, they would pad your order total by a dollar or two.

When we were little, we went to Saint Peter’s school at 4th and Pine. St. Peter’s always had this wonderful Christmas book fair. At the book fair every year I would get a Marguerite De Angeli, and she would autograph it. She was a famous children’s author and she did the most exquisite illustrations. She was actually quite famous back then, but she was a friend of the mother of the headmistress so she would always come to our book fair. She lived in Philadelphia and died in 1987 at 98 years old. I still have her books. Seeing her for many Christmases and getting a book signed by her is still one of my most favorite and precious Christmas memories. I still encourage people to pick up her books used for their children today. They are the most wonderful stories

St. Peter’s also did this whole Christmas procession thing where we all had these white gowns and we went with candles from the school into the church and they were Christmas carols and what not.

Other things I remember from childhood in Society Hill was going a lot of Christmas seasons to Gloria Dei, Old Swedes’ Church. There we would watch Lucia Fest. Sankta Lucia. At Gloria Dei Church the celebration is held within the walls constructed by Swedish settlers in 1699-1700, in the beauty of candlelight, with a large entourage of young girls joining her in song and procession. For many people, participation in the Lucia Fest is a unique way of marking the beginning of the holiday season.

When I got older and we moved to the Main Line, I have all sorts of memories and some of my favorites are the sound of sleigh bells. When we first moved to the Main Line, we lived across the street from Mr. Gwinn. He not only had magnificent carriages, but spectacular old fashioned sleighs as well. I remember one time when he took my mother and another neighborhood lady on a sleigh ride. Now you have to understand my mother doesn’t like horses and is not comfortable around them. He would leave them with the carriage and the horses while he would dash into someone’s house along the way for a nip of something festive and then come back out.

I seem to remember more snow at Christmas time when we were growing up then we have today. And at that point in time when I was younger and in high school the Main Line was so different. Larger properties, sweeping gardens, and people went all out for Christmas. They also did their own decorating.

I remember being a young teenager on the Main Line before we all drove walking everywhere. Or taking the train. my friend Anna and I would walk into the center of Bryn Mawr and go Christmas shopping at Katydid in Bryn Mawr. Next door to Katydid was an awesome book shop, and down a little flight of steps at a basement level was Mr. Fish’s jewelry shop. And of course, Parvin’s Pharmacy. Going further up Lancaster Ave., Susan Vitale had a wonderful antique store, there was a toy store, and I also remember fondly Eskil’s Clog Shop and The Country Cousin.

And you can’t forget when talking about Bryn Mawr all the hours spent in the Owl Bookshop in Bryn Mawr. I still think it’s a mistake that Bryn Mawr College took that away years ago. It was the most wonderful old bookshop they had new that were gently used newer books, vintage books, antique books, collectors’ books. It was musty and smells like an old library and it was wonderful. I still have almost every book I found there from the time I was a teenager. They would also have a box of orphaned books that they would put out for riders of the train inside the Bryn Mawr train station.It was musty and smells like an old library and it was wonderful. I still have almost every book I found there from the time I was a teenager. They would also have a box of orphaned books that they would put out for riders of the train inside the Bryn Mawr train station.

In Haverford, tucked into one of the train station buildings was Arnold Brown’s Cheese Wheel. Down in Ardmore you had Suburban Square before it was “improved“ and the original Strawbridge & Clothier. And there was still a movie theatre. Main Street AKA Lancaster Avenue in Ardmore also had lots of wonderful shops and there was a FW Woolworths with a lunch counter. They sold great Christmas ornaments there when we were kids, the old school Shiny Brite and other kinds of ornaments. And there was also the Army Navy store and Harrison‘s department store across the street, which also had a branch in Wayne. Harrison’s is where we would often buy our Levi’s, or Levi’s corduroys and the wide wale super preppy corduroys in annoying bright colors.

I remember the shops and everything at Christmas as a kid we’re very festive. This is why I so appreciate places like Smithfield barn, Brandywine View Antiques, Life’s Patina, Burkholder‘s in Malvern, Frazer Antiques, and even Surrey Consignment Shop in Berwyn. All of these places decorate for Christmas as well as having a great selection of things that you can buy as Christmas gifts. It reminds me of how the shops I remember as a kid would get decked out for the holidays.

When we were in high school, our mothers all worked on what were then called the Shipley Christmas Shops. Back then we had multiple religions and ethnicities volunteering, and everyone was OK with calling them the Christmas Shops.

My mother and plenty of my friends’ mothers volunteered for this event. As a matter of fact, I remember the year it was held in an old mansion off of Bryn Mawr Avenue. That was the year they had these fabulous woolens and they were these Christmas plaid tartans and stuff that were magical. I still remember it and this was circa 1979 or 1980.

People don’t remember that this event used to be held offsite. When it was able to come onsite at Shipley and into the Yarnall gym it wasn’t bad for years. What changed were the parents volunteering because they just weren’t as friendly as they used to be. That’s why I stopped going. I used to love to go to this every year, and then there was just this one year that the parental volunteers even at the sign in table were cold. Unfriendly. They weren’t even particularly warm to the older alumnae who came. Oh and they had a Lu La Roe booth. I mean come on. And then, of course, there was the year not so long ago were the woman helping a local business on their booth actually stole from other vendors. (Yes, really.)

And that’s what really changed. It was the attitude of the volunteers and what they were willing to do and really they just wanted the credit to say they did it, and they didn’t put as much effort into it. And they certainly weren’t hunting down great businesses, or even using alumni/alumnae businesses.

Yes, there are a lot of online retailers but guess what? People love these shopping events and I actually think what changed were those volunteering and the attitudes of the purported volunteers who were supposed to be running the event. They didn’t want to do the work. It’s sad, but not just here.

This is something you see across the board with volunteer committees in the region. People don’t want to put the effort into these things anymore. The parties, fundraisers, and these shopping events don’t plan themselves. This is why you are seeing the literal demise of non-profit events, but the demise of volunteerism and committees. Women used to join these committees because it was the right thing to do and it was good to give back. What that evolved into in my humble opinion is how much they could get out of it personally and that was never the point.

So this year, after doing the event since 1960, Shipley cancelled the event. They can’t get enough volunteers apparently which is really sad. Someone said to me about how all these women work and I just kind of looked at them because women have always worked, and volunteered.

Something else volunteer related I always loved was the Christmas Bazaar at The Church of the Redeemer in Bryn Mawr. I am guessing they still do it in some form, but I have to tell you it was amazing!

Upstairs in the church hall and where the offices and kitchen were was the silent auction. You could also buy lunch and sit at a table in the church hall which was all decked out in Christmas decorations and greenery it was fabulous!

Downstairs was the white elephant room where you could find all sorts of things including then fabulous vintage Christmas ornaments. Down the hall from the white elephant was the churches thrift shop which was a treasure trove of items. It was one of my favorite places to find vintage pocketbooks. Then there was a room for toys and then there were a couple of big rooms for books. I always bought way too many books, and still have a lot of them decades later.

A lot of these Christmas bazaars and shops and shopping events my friends and I went to for years and years. They kind of set the tone for Christmas. We also would start hunting Christmas in the fall at the St. David’s Fair. We all still attend the St. David’s Fair and one of my dearest friends pours her heart and soul into this event every year. As a matter of fact, the St. David’s Fair is an event that has aged well which is entirely due to the volunteers.

But Christmas is not just about the decorations and preparations, it’s about a state of mind that is sometimes difficult to achieve some days. There is an emotional component that can be hard.

Christmas is a joyous season, but it is also a bittersweet season. People who have experienced great loss can find Christmas a heavy load. They have their memories with departed loved ones. Others have memories with them and those who are no longer with us. How does one balance it? Do you keep some of the old while incorporating new? Or do you do everything everyone else expects at the expense of yourself?

I find myself thinking of my father and brother in law who passed away this time of year. Both loved Christmas. This was the first time since 2005 which is when my father died, that I didn’t cry when I got to the ornament boxes that still have his handwriting on it. I smiled. It made me happy, like I was saying hello again to ornaments I grew up with. Like the little rabbit ornament that was on my parents’ first tree. I smiled again as I was planning Christmas cookies yet to be baked. I thought of my late brother in law. I can still hear him coming into his house arms full of Christmas packages and referring to my niece as “cake.” We all miss him. He was a tremendous human being, and had the uncanny gift of being able to see people. He was very kind, and he also loved Christmas.

Life is messy, but I suppose it’s what you make out of the mess when all is said and done. We all want these picture perfect holidays, much like all of the Christmas and holiday movies on Lifetime, CBS, Hallmark, Netflix, etc. O.K. if you find those families, please let me know. Life can be significantly less fun at times, and issues (especially around the holidays) take longer to work out.

This has been a hard year for so many people. Economy, life in general, family…or just emotional. The people posting perfect everything without a hint of reality? I am guessing that is what gets them through the day. I have never been a good fake it until you make it, or don’t kind of person. I am just me.

This is not necessarily my easiest Christmas. I have found myself wavering between “Yay, it’s Christmas!” and “Yeah, whatever.”

It has been a long year. For everyone. But there have been plenty of spots of joy and laughter. And there are so many out there who are in truly bad situations. We all need to be grateful for what we do have, not concentrate on envy of what we don’t have.

Face it they all have been long years since the end of 2019 when everything in our worlds’ changed thanks to COVID19. And then of course, it has all gotten longer thanks to insane politics and extremist groups who wish to limit our basic rights and freedoms in this country.

So I am going to take a breath and try to soak up the season, and remember why we celebrate it. Have faith. Things will get better.

Thanks for stopping by.

ghosts of christmas past

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I have been going to write this post for a few days. Every time I sat down to begin it, life got in the way, so I decided I just need to start it today.

Why the title of the post? I was going through old photos and it just sort of hit me is that was the title. The photos I was going through were of parties and black-tie fundraisers from many, many years ago.

One of the things I loved best about a lot of those parties were the dresses we had back then. So we’re talking the 80s through mid 90s. And especially in the late 80s, the dresses were pretty. That was one of my favorite era for black tie dresses and gowns. I am not talking the Dynasty-esque dresses, there were just a lot of pretty, well made dresses.

How fancy you dressed back then, was dictated by the event itself. And the events themselves were kind of special. You couldn’t just buy a ticket and subscribe necessarily, you need to receive an invitation to do that. ticket prices for the event but they weren’t exorbitant. Of course back then sometimes they felt exorbitant because a lot of us were just starting out working full-time after college, etc.

Back, then black tie was predominantly floor length as far as the dresses went. Sometimes tea length, it just depended on the dress. White tie was something else again. Perhaps one of my favorite gowns was this crazy beautiful iridescent silk taffeta Victor Costa gown. My mother bought it for me at Nan Duskin in Philadelphia.

There were a lot of stores as in department stores and boutiques to choose from. And they always had a selection of ladies black tie attire. And the dresses were pretty, the fabrics had body to them.

And most importantly, at least for me as compared to the majority of the dresses you see today in photos, Hoochie Mama wasn’t hollering for her dress back. Sure there was tons of strapless, but the dresses left a little to the imagination and they weren’t sliced all the way down the chest bone or all the way up to the pelvic bone, it seemed.

Also back then? Plastic surgery was reserved for something your mother’s friends did, sometimes badly. Today it feels like no one can age gracefully (or otherwise) and plastic surgery and procedures seem to be starting rather young.

The parties, especially at Christmas, were so much fun. The Charity Ball is in the Philadelphia Charity Ball, at that point was December 23. but before that starting in November, there were all sorts of events and Christmas parties. Around Thanksgiving was Pilgrimage on the Parkway.

I remember a few parties that were even held at 30th St., Station. One Christmas party I remember in particular because I had this dress back then that I loved and this party was not formal, it was semi formal. Semi-formal meant short dresses and men wore coat and tie. I had found this dress at John Wanamaker’s when it was still, John Wanamaker’s. The dress was a wonderful red with blue undertones as opposed to orange. It had a halter neck and a regular zip up back but it was the 80s, so the halter collar part was pearls. Not big, huge, Barbara Bush sized pearls, they were regular sized, but that was the entire color. The dress was to the knee.

Back then half of what we wore as far as evening shoes were simple, black peau de soie pumps. The heels were an average height, they weren’t sky high, and the heels weren’t chunky. And if you didn’t have those you had velvet pumps of a similar style. Essentially classic and elegant.

Sometimes we had our hair done in an updo, but not all the time. I have pretty thick hair and I remember one party that I went to in Alexandria Old Town, Virginia. I ended up taking out the up do before the party because the woman had teased my hair into a southern up do and it looked like I was related to Imelda Marcos. I still remember that moment because it was really funny.

And at that time, I had a lot of friends in the Washington DC area. People who had migrated there for work after college and more. And back then when you went to Washington for one of those black ties or Christmas parties, you had to bring your A game. those women in DC knew how to dress. And the dresses were gorgeous down there. So were the parties.

This one group of girls I remember used to do this great holiday fundraiser and it was black-tie edit benefited Toys for Tots. I want to say for a while it was held I think back then at the Ritz Carlton in Washington DC. I remember it was always held on a lower level of the hotel and wherever it was held there were these antique dioramas built into the wall on that level they were kind of fascinating to look at.

And at one of those Washington DC Christmas parties one year, we all met Walter Cronkite. He was in town for something , but retired at that point. I remember how tall he seemed. He had come into DC from Annapolis. He was so nice. He actually did stop to speak to all of us. And his voice in person was just as great as it was on TV. He had been at something at the hotel and literally just stuck his head into the party we were at to check it out. I remember he had such a nice face in person and his eyes sparkled.

This was of course before the age of social media. So there weren’t many photos. Just memories. Like memories of the parental units going to black tie Christmas parties. Or the Christmas parties we went to as a family. All dressed up, white tights, mary janes, and matching dresses until we revolted finally. Oh and don’t forget the matching Christmas nightgowns!

And all of these parties had great food and beverages served using actual china and glassware, and no plastic utensils.

I remember neighborhood parties. I remember one where every year one neighborhood man would wear his Christmas plaid pants. And sometimes a Christmas vest. The pants were what my one grandmother would have called “high water” pants, or they were a little too short. He would greet everyone at every party with a big grin and say “Howdy, neighbor!” (No it wasn’t Texas, it was the Main Line.)

Back then there were quite a few neighborhood parties. As a general society, we weren’t so transient. People moved into areas and stayed, they didn’t move into areas and then flip for the next bigger house. People actually sang Christmas carols, and knew their neighbors. Even if I didn’t want to be all dressed up and looking exactly like my sister, the parties were pretty fun and festive.

Then there were the caroling parties every year with my cousin Suzy. Suzy lived in Newtown, Bucks County. None of us could sing, but we would still gather at Suzy‘s house. There was a little Christmas party, then we would go around Christmas caroling for a while, laugh like hell, and go back to Suzy’s l house. Suzy was also one of the first people I went hunting vintage Christmas ornaments with. Often that meant getting up at o’dark early to hit the flea markets outside of New Hope.

Then there were the family Christmas parties with my mother’s German friends, Susi and Babette. Those parties were spectacular like out of a movie set, but they weren’t artificial. They were natural and gorgeous and very German. The ornaments on the trees, fresh greens, candle light. We always loved going to their houses. And the fun thing about their parties were the people were so interesting and fun. When I entertain today, I still like to channel them. No pigs in a blanket at their houses, which was always fine because that to this day is an hors d’oeuvre, I don’t understand nor like.

In the 90s I remember being invited to this spectacular Christmas party. It was on Fishers Road in Bryn Mawr. A beautiful little house on a shared driveway. I’m not even sure if the house still exists because so many places have been knocked down for bigger houses to be built.

Anyway, the guy that owned the house had something to do with IKEA and he and his partner lived in it. He did this totally glorious European/Scandinavian Christmas party. The decorations were beautiful. Unbelievable trees and greens and decorations. The house was just decked. Candlelight. There were also so many different kinds of fish. Beautiful oysters on the half shell and shrimp and crab and I don’t even know what else. A true smörgåsbord. Ham, beef, cheeses, fruit. The house was like a jewel box. I think the reason I liked that party so much it was like another version of what my mother’s friends Susi and Babette would do.

These parties I remember were all pretty. The houses festive and beautiful. The decorating done by the homeowners, not a Christmas decorating service. Everyone was a little Martha Stewart on the Christmas bus back then. And it wasn’t party trays from the grocery store, these were planned out menus that the hostess did, and for the most part prepared herself. Yes, these kinds of parties are a lot of work, but they are worth it and your guests appreciate it.

As I mentioned, there were the annual Christmas parties you attended with your family. One party we went to we attended for decades. We watched the changes from the first wife to the second wife. With the first wife, sometimes they would all be there to greet you at the door. The wife and daughters in quasi matching dresses of icy perfection. With the second wife, it was all warmer and more genuine. And every year the Christmas tree was different. The most amusing thing about this party is every year the core crowd was the same. It was a party where I knew every year like clockwork that I would see certain friends. It was never the most exciting party, but it was beautiful and nice.

Then you grow up and everything is different again. And what is so funny is how things change now that we are the age of our parents taking all of us to Christmas parties or fussing about our gowns for The Charity Ball.

Me personally? On one hand, I loved all the fun black tie holiday parties and the annual Christmas parties we went to. But then on the other hand, I love our own Christmas traditions in a completely different time.

Now it’s us. Pre-COVID, we did a few Christmas parties, including one at Loch Aerie before she opened as a wedding and event venue. She was restored but the kitchen was just a shell and the ballroom addition was not built. Duffy’s did the catering with a kitchen in a big truck.

But mostly, even before COVID hit, it is us, at home. Those are our traditions. Not as formal, never as dressy. These days it’s more about how will I display my vintage Christmas ornaments and where on my tree will my wool felted Christmas mice will go. But the Christmas dishes and real glasses and silverware still come out.

I remember years ago, before I was married, and I was with someone else, we would go to their relatives for Christmas sometimes. The brother and sister-in-law took the time to do a beautiful meal with real plates and silverware and glasses, and then there was the other sister, and it was a lot of plastic cups and cooking things in disposable tinfoil pans. Obviously, you know which house I liked better.

A friend of my mine and I were talking about all of this yesterday. She texted me a photo, all bundled up underneath an umbrella in the rain waiting for Santa to come by on a fire truck where she lived. She says to me “this is me, no more Charity balls.” And then we both laughed, because I knew where she was coming from exactly. My friend’s parents also threw these amazing holiday parties and her mother’s house was one of my favorites. And like my own parents, everything was decorated and beautiful at Christmas.

And then there are other things that you remember about the season as a little kid. The Sears Wishbook. That catalog was huge and I remember a year after year turning down the corners of pages where there were dolls and toys I wanted. No kid ever got their entire wish list but thumbing through that catalog was kind of a Christmas tradition in and of itself.

So now we are all decorating our own homes. Sometimes my friends and I wonder how our mothers did it all. But as we all decorate, we all remember our ghosts of Christmas past. There aren’t nearly enough photos but we remember the feelings, the sound, the smells. Every year some of the images in our memory fade a little bit, yet many still remain. The echoes of people talking in rooms that no longer exist, with festive music playing in the background. Even some memories of Christmas sleigh and carriage rides. I still hear the jingles of sleigh bells, which is probably why I have some hanging in my house all year round.

Continue to create your Christmas memories. They are so important. And for goodness sake, no paper plates and plastic glasses. The season comes but once a year. Make it special.

Thanks for stopping by!

are people actually thankful on thanksgiving?

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In less than an hour, it will be Thanksgiving. 2022. What am I wondering this year? Something some may find odd: I am wondering if people are actually thankful on Thanksgiving anymore ?

Thankful. Grateful. Blessed. These words are exceedingly overused in our everyday vernacular. They are almost too casually tossed out here and there, like verbal popcorn. I question if people really are any of those things sometimes.

We live in a beautiful, yet often cruel and hateful world. Just look at social media. It is a modern way to keep us connected, yet it’s a bully pulpit for so many to be so hateful. I know my critics will scoff at that idea, since everything they project on me, they actually do.

Ironic, isn’t it? The pious perfectionists of social media are the ones who do the most damage. They have narrow comfort levels and in some cases, narrow knowledge bases, which of course leads to their narrow opinions, narrow world view.

These people have made a difficult couple of years for all of us, more difficult. Which brings me to why I am thankful. I am thankful I am not those people. I am thankful those people are not my people in all of their judgmental glory.

Life is not some perfectly staged silent tableaux. Life is messy and real and in technicolor. We need to give ourselves permission to live our lives out loud. Every day will not ever be perfect, nor should it be. It’s time for all of us to stop the apology tour for the skewed perspectives of others. Be thankful for who we are as human beings. Be thankful for those who see us.

That is not to say that we all couldn’t stand to be a little more kind at times. Sure we all could, but that doesn’t mean we are supposed to roll over and have doormat stamped on our foreheads.

I am thankful and grateful. For my life. For my friends and family.

Thanksgiving marks the start of a season where so many feel so alone. Even if they aren’t. In the season of giving, sometimes just a simple checking in can help some people.

2022 has been a crazy year I think. And very hard and full of loss for some, change for others, and maybe a bit of both for a lot of us. Sadness and gladness, bittersweet, hard, eventful, exhausting.

I think all of us can also say we are happy to have survived La Vida COVID. So many did not. And COVID has definitely taught us not to take a lot of the everyday for granted.

I will never pretend to have all of the answers in life, or even some answers because I always have questions.

Anyway, as it is after midnight, it is officially Thanksgiving.

Gobble, gobble.

Happy Thanksgiving.

it’s november, so of course we need soup…french onion mushroom soup….

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I have a slight obsession with French Onion Soup. I’ve written about it before and my quest to find and develop a recipe I really liked and I think that was in 2015. I have been fiddling and fiddling with the way I make it, and I think this is the best batch so far.

My friend Karen‘s mother made the best French Onion Soup I’ve ever had anywhere. It was even better than the H.A. Winston soup that we all loved growing up. But I’ve kind of developed my own now which isn’t bad if I do say so myself. But I definitely have a memory of being in Karen‘s mother’s kitchen when she had that soup cooking. The aroma and the fragrance of it just filled the room.

I start my soup the day before with roasting my beef bones in the oven for beef stock. Then I throw everything into a stockpot with wine, water, and a 32 oz. container of low salt beef broth. To that I had a couple of carrots, celery or Celeriac (celery root), onion, fresh herbs, and that’s how I make my beef broth. This time I made my beef bone broth with Celeriac, because that is what I had. I cook this for a few hours. I let it simmer and cook down and condense. If I do it in the instant pot it takes a lot less time for the broth component.

I prepare the beef bone broth the day before because I like to fish the bones out of the broth and dispose of them, and then put the broth in the refrigerator overnight because then as you can see from the photo I shared above, I can skim the fat off the top very easily. This bone broth I made this time was truly gorgeous. This morning it was totally gelatinous like a consommé. That’s what you want.

Also, people always ask me how many beef bones I use. Honestly? It varies and this time I had 10 beef bones.

I line a big sheet pan with aluminum foil. Then I sprinkle them with just a smidge of olive oil and add salt pepper, Herbes de Provence, and garlic. When I roast them I do it at a 375° oven. I just keep an eye on the oven I think they were roasted through in about 35 to 40 minutes. Then I just turned the oven off and let everything cool down a bit before I bring them out of the oven and throw them into the stockpot as indicated above.

These bones were actually a surprise I did not know I still had in the bottom of our chest freezer they had come with a meat order from our local butcher, Worrell’s. Truthfully, you really do have to go to a local farmers market meat purveyor, or a local butcher shop to get good bones. And ask before you want to make the soup, because it’s not like the good old days and they don’t always have the bones.

The next day I start with caramelizing my onions, and today’s onions are the last I will ever get at Pete’s Produce Farm in Westtown which makes me sad. I use a combination of red and white onions. I add a little salt, a couple of tablespoons of butter, and a couple of dashes of balsamic vinegar to the bottom of the pot. You do want to caramelize your onions, but pay attention or they will burn. I almost killed them today because I was on the phone when I was doing this.

I also add mushrooms now to my recipe and that is pretty much because my husband loves mushrooms. The mushrooms, Cremini, came from Pete’s as well. I am so going to miss the produce and that store because these mushrooms were the prettiest I’ve had all year to cook with. But I have to admit that adding mushrooms especially this kind to soup add another layer of flavor that is just wonderful.

When I’m putting it all together after the onions have cooked down and caramelized, if I feel there is not enough liquid, then I will use a little additional bone broth or Better Than Bouillon to help it along. And you also cannot forget your healthy dash of Flavor Master’s Gravy Master. Why? Because that is something they put in the H.A. Winston soup when they were making it.

Today I did add an 8 ounce container additionally of bone broth. I also added a good half a bottle of wine

I wish I had a more exact and proportionate recipe written down, but I don’t a lot of times I cook things by the way I think they feel.

I will serve my French onion soup in a few minutes with a little shredded Gruyère on top but I don’t do the whole thing with the big hunk of bread and put it in the broiler. That’s too much work for me. The soup is work enough on its own. Besides it’s something I always eat around French onion soup when I get it at a restaurant, anyway.

We are also having an arugula and spinach salad with elite seasoning tomato and a honey mustard vinaigrette.

Bon appétit 👩‍🍳

why are you connected to people on social media?

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Why people connect with each other on social media is something I always find sociologically fascinating. So why do you connect?

Take Facebook and Instagram. I connect primarily to maintain relationships with friends and family I don’t necessarily see as often as we did when were younger. Even former teachers. And friends of my parents and other relatives I am connected to.

In addition to the school and familial ties, there are the other friendships and relationships I have made along the way. Friends I have made as an adult, former work colleagues, neighbors, and people in the communities in which I have lived past and present.

I am not connected to people because of what they can do for me. I connect with people I like or feel a personal connection to. Sometimes that means the extended friends of friends.

When I like a business and follow their “pages”, mostly it’s because I am a customer. I will like a friend’s business page because they are my friend. That’s not the same as saying I’m promoting their business because they are my friend, because I don’t really promote businesses. If I put my blogging hat on, I’m not a compensated blogger so I like to stay out of gray areas.

When I speak about a business, it’s because I am a customer. Mostly it’s when I am a happy customer. But not all of the time. Sometimes I speak about a business to ask people if they’ve used it or gone to a specific restaurant, for example.

Sometimes when I speak of a business on social media, it has been when I didn’t feel valued as a customer or had a truly negative experience. Sometimes the business is a big business or a utility company. But when customer service is truly lacking, sometimes that is your only option to get things made right, isn’t it?

But what I don’t do is the whole disingenuous of it all. I don’t connect with people on social media because of what they can do for me. So maybe that makes folks with an emphasis on marketing confused, or makes them wish to have their heads spin around, but I actually do try to keep it real.

Facebook and Instagram is also where I follow things that connect to my interests. Traveling, although I don’t do much of that. Gardening, cooking, movies, TV or streaming shows, vintage and antique items like Christmas ornaments. Also things like decorating. I love to see what some of them do with rooms. It’s interesting. Especially if they don’t decorate for a beige, beige world.

I also will use Facebook and Instagram to keep up with nonprofits I like, and organizations I belong to which are nonprofits. Or magazines, blogs, and newspapers I read. Social issues. Local issues. Sometimes beauty products, but that doesn’t mean I will post about everything I like or buy. And you have to be careful with things like beauty products because suddenly they will show up in your feeds everywhere as ads, even if you didn’t invite them.

When it comes to a platform liked LinkedIn, to an extent that is kind of a mystery. I have never been particularly sure of the value of the platform. It has some crossover with other platforms, but in the sense of a lot of the same people I am connected to elsewhere. It’s a platform where I always find it amusing on who is “looking at me.” And that usually is linked to something I have written – people connected to politicians, developers, utility companies, people from companies that shouldn’t be utility companies and so on.

It’s not like some one wants to reach out via LinkedIn and offer me a dream job or gig or give me a million dollars. LinkedIn is where a lot of people go to spy, looking for that “gotcha” moment or dirt. You know, much how people view Facebook?

Twitter is something I discovered in the platform’s early days vis-à-vis community activism. I have kept up with it as a way to keep track of issues and the news, but it’s also a platform where some of my long term friends are found who shun Facebook and Instagram. It’s also a place where I keep up with gardening and cooking.

Sometimes I don’t go on Twitter very often. Like during the years a certain person was president. I found the site much more palatable after they removed him. However it doesn’t mean that his children of the corn don’t lurk and spread their vitriol and misinformation, so sometimes I pass Twitter by because of that.

Twitter is one of those places where I don’t get overly personal kind of like LinkedIn , but I observe when people use it as their outlet. I don’t even know who a lot of them are in reality, it’s just their place to express themselves.

Like everyone else on the planet, there are days where I spend far too much time on social media. But it’s not my sole thing. And I don’t use it to portray a life that doesn’t exist, either. I don’t use it as a tool to be a social climber. It’s just sort of an appendage to the modern world.

I think sometimes we all need to lose the appendage of social media and live in real time. Disconnect. Connect with other human beings more meaningfully.

And yes there are lots of other platforms I didn’t mention. But if I don’t belong to them, how do I have a basis of knowledge to comment about them intelligently. Or there are others I belong to that I use so rarely, they don’t warrant discussion.

Why did I write this post? I’m not really sure. It just sort of popped into my head this morning.

Have a great day!

welcome to philadelphia, the city of brotherly beat downs.

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I am sure Radnor Township and many other municipalities are thrilled that I have decided to “phocus” on Philadelphia today.

It’s always hard to say what the most negative thing is about Philadelphia, Pennsylvania at present. And as a native born Philadelphian, I don’t say this lightly.

Filthadelphia and Crimeadelphia are two of my favorite nicknames. I was born in Philadelphia in the mid-1960s. We lived there with my parents until the mid-1970s. I saw a lot even as a kid, and one of the things that finally drove my parents from the city in the mid-1970s was crime. And it was crime in part that happened to a friend of mine and myself. We were riding our bicycles in our neighborhood and we were jumped by a gang of kids from elsewhere. We were literally two little girls riding our bikes. And because we didn’t have anything worth taking, including our bicycles, they instead smashed the glasses of my friend into her face.

As a grew up I watched Philadelphia have fits and starts of a renaissance. During the Bill Green years (94th mayor), the Ed Rendell years (96th mayor), and with the Michael Nutter years (98th) you often felt better about the City of Philadelphia. A fun, unrelated fact is one Philadelphia mayor, J. Hampton Moore, who was the 83rd and 86th mayor and a member of Congress lived at one time in the house we called home in Society Hill when I was little. The current lame duck mayor is Jim Kenney. He is the 99th mayor of the City of Philadelphia.

To me, Jim Kenney is like the Dr. Oz of Philadelphia mayors of recent history. Started out talking a big game, but there’s nothing to back it up. And now he’s just a lame duck who limps along. And then if you look at what else is happening today, it’s like every day you wonder if someone else resigned from Philadelphia City Council to run for mayor?

Philadelphia is a major city in shambles. Crime literally runs the city, and the city is also literally filthy. There is trash everywhere and then if you look at the streets within the city of Philadelphia, and the sidewalks, they are like a giant hazard every day. From potholes to broken sidewalks, random holes in sidewalks to where grates are missing and someone could actually fall in some kind of a hole and really hurt themselves, Philadelphia is disgusting. And this is so horrible because Philadelphia is the birthplace of America!

So today when I saw a post on Facebook from a friend of mine it was like I can’t keep my mouth shut any longer. This friend of mine is an artist, he is one of the premier portraitists in the United States today, and probably extending as far as different parts of the world like Europe.

His name is Garth Herrick. He is not some kind of flashy, showboating artist, he’s a working artist. He is a gentle soul and a kind person and humble. He’s the kind of person that would stop to help you if you were in distress and he would do it even if he didn’t know you. He’s just a good person. Because he lives in the city he often rides his bike because look at Philadelphia? Do you ever try to park on the street Philadelphia? Or what happens if you give up a space? Also, he is an avid cyclist in general and he cycles everywhere.

He was going down the street in the right direction, sounds like a smaller street or something like that, and he encountered a cab coming the wrong way. What ensued is absolutely nuts, and essentially the cab driver beat the crap out of him.

After ramming Garth on his bike with his cab, it was recounted that then the cab driver got out of his car and went after Garth and his bike. Garth had nowhere to go and had warned the cab driver he was going the wrong way on a narrow one-way street. I think the cab driver sounded like he was screaming at my friend to get out of his way. The only problem with that is there were actually cars behind my friend as well proceeding in the proper direction. I don’t think he had much of anywhere to go?

According to what he said, and a statement that he and apparently another witness gave to the police it was a cab driver from Germantown Cab Company. The witness actually got the license plate according to what Garth posted.

Now let’s get to the rest of this. Germantown Cab Company has been in the news before. Not positive.

Philadelphia Magazine: Germantown Cab Company Shut Down by PPA
150 cars taken out of service.
by JOEL MATHIS· 3/10/2014, 1:46 p.m.

Philadelphia Business Journal and NBC 10report that the Philadelphia Parking Authority has shut down Germantown Cab Company, taking 150 taxis off the streets for allegedly failing to turn over proper documentation and background checks on the company’s drivers.

But that’s not the only thing. Apparently the Philadelphia Police Department didn’t show up for an hour and a half to the scene and how is that even possible????? My friend turned down their offer of medical assistance and friends took him to a local hospital to be treated that he was comfortable with. (Because that’s the thing in addition that makes this hard, when they send an ambulance or whatever to take you to a hospital it’s not necessarily where you want to go.)

My elderly mother has been accosted more than twice in front of her building in what is considered a good neighborhood by mentally ill homeless vagrants. The last time it happened it was so bad that someone kindly jumped out of a car on the street and pulled the homeless man off of my mother who was sitting on a bench next to the front door of her apartment building. When I asked my mother why she didn’t call the police she told me because when you call the police in Philadelphia a lot of the time they don’t show up or they show up hours later.

You hear horror stories about crime everywhere. But in Philadelphia it’s extra special. They have a police officer shortage to begin with, and a lot of controversy over what they call “extended tours“ for officers.

And I think a lot of this as far as the total deterioration of Philadelphia can be laid directly at the feet of lame duck Mayor Jim Kenney. He is what my great aunt from South Philadelphia would have referred to as a “bum.”

So Kenney, what are you going to do here, yo.? Why am I writing about this? Because this isn’t the end of the story. And I think this also needs airing.

When my friend was waiting for police to arrive, he posted about what happened including a photo of his battered face in his local Facebook group in Germantown. Some people were sympathetic, but others were downright terrible. He was accused of being like the living embodiment of white privilege to being called a “Karen.”

I have screenshots of these comments, but I am choosing not to share them. I think they would only serve to inflame tensions in a very beleaguered section of Philadelphia which is just tired of crime.

But victim shaming/blaming is just something I find reprehensible.

I have to ask have we stooped so low as a society that we can’t exhibit any compassion or kindness? And again my friend is a salt of the earth kind of human being, he is just simply a really good guy. I also wonder if in this instance if he wasn’t a guy reporting a crime within his local Facebook group while waiting for the police if it would have made a difference?

So that is it for this sad story of crime and victim shaming straight from the streets of Philadelphia.

I think we all need to do better and try harder no matter where we live. And here’s hoping that the City of Philadelphia does something about this. Enough law and disorder.

pay it forward: contribute to the love thy neighbor fund

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When a friend texts you a photo like this holding THEIR wedding photo, you feel like the room is spinning. And in my world, we have been so caught up in a very sick dog in ICU at VRC, I had no idea my friend’s barn caught fire Saturday morning.

Thankfully, none of the animals or humans living on the farm were killed or injured. And no, the house didn’t catch fire. But they had just moved to the farm and were painting the farmhouse and fixing her floors….so all of their possessions: furniture, clothes, pictures, kid’s toys, books, shoes, etc, etc WERE IN THE BARN. Along with farm equipment.

The barn and contents are a total loss. Thanks to the marvelous firefighters in Chester County, the house was saved and so were all humans and animals. Kimberton Fire Company took the lead here, and they were so amazing.

It is a daunting loss. But we love our friend Ashley May Brenner and we are paying it forward for her, like she does for everyone else, every single day. It’s who she is. A hard working, pretty, intelligent woman who is also a young widow. She has the biggest heart. And she needs not only a barn raising right now, she needs a life raising.

So some of us who are her friends, along with some of our friends have banded together to give Ashley and her family a hand up. We have started a Go Fund Me and truly hope to surpass our posted goal because fundraising platforms charge a percentage. We are hoping you can help us out? Any amount you can spare?

Please?

Here is what we said in the Go Fund Me:

Love They Neighbor❤️

This past weekend an amazing local family lost just about everything in an early morning barn fire. Having just moved in two weeks ago all of their furniture, clothes, toys, and household items were being stored in the barn while they did some painting and renovating. While the true blessing is that no one was hurt and the animals were all rescued safely by our amazing local fire companies the reality is that a home needs furniture, and lamps and stuff, closets need filled, kids need toys, and so on. I have had the absolute pleasure of knowing this family for several years now and while I agree with her that all that was lost were just things and things can be replaced I also believe when a friend, a neighbor, when anyone needs help you simply help in any small way you can. This woman is truly an amazing, strong, and beautiful soul.. having lost her husband unexpectedly one month ago, to moving her family and animals to their new farm two weeks ago, to now this she has been nothing short of courageous and strong through it all. Always finding the silver lining in anything and everything she can… she is amazing, her kids are amazing, her animals bring smiles to so many, and it’s time to show them some good old local love in the form of a “house raising”. While the barn raising will happen in the future it’s the house we are focused on filling now… so…the barn is joining together with several other amazing local community members to reach out far and wide for help…

Help comes in all ways and forms… it comes in donating gift cards to the family for supplies, food, and more…. in contributing to a go fund me that will be going live later today, and most importantly through kind words, love, and support from the community around you. It takes a village and this village is going to show up for this family.. so if you can help rebuild dreams, help fill the house, help create new memories and smiles thank you. Thank you for showing this amazing family what a village can do when led by neighborly love…❤️

And… always, always, always remember your local fire departments.. always there when you need them and always going above and beyond.

❤️Love what…. and who…are local ❤️

If you want to help with this “house raising” gift cards can be dropped off at the barn (425 Little Conestoga Rd Downingtown). If you have furniture or other items to donate off the wish list please send me a private message to coordinate. 

If you’d like to send a card or note or something else to show your neighborly love that too can be dropped off here at the barn. If you’d like to help delivering furniture and other things let me know! First load is headed over today!! And if you’d like to help in any other way please just reach out….

Let’s join together to show this amazing family what a community can do when we all lend a helping hand❤️

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you❤️❤️❤️

~LOVE THY NEIGHBOR ❤️ASHLEY MAY BRENNER FUND❤️

Hunting for anything that might have survived among the ashes.

But for the Grace of God go any of us here. This could be any of us. So we are asking for the community to rally for one of our own.

Here is the story told by Kimberton Fire Company (CLICK HERE.)

I really hope that people in Chester County can put aside their differences that seem to grow by the day to help this family.

At the end of this post will be a slideshow of photos. This next photo is what the barn looked like before the fire. It was a magnificent 18th century barn and they also want to rebuild.

Shortly after they moved into Cloverleaf farm just outside the village of Kimberton.

Please help if you can. Even sharing to someone who can help if you can’t is a help. Yes this is personal for me, because Ashley is my friend. And she did not ask us to do this, because she is so self-reliant and independent. But she is our friend and we want to help. So please consider helping us help her.

Here is the link to LOVE THY NEIGHBOR ❤️ASHLEY MAY BRENNER FUND❤️ or https://gofund.me/55805ac1

Thank you for stopping by and thanks for reading.

But for the Grace of God go any of us. Also, please support your local fire department wherever you live.

now open: sycamore & stone

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So yesterday I did a thing. I went and checked out the new Sycamore & Stone on 401!

Jeff Devlin‘s new property is one I am familiar with, because I used to patronize the antique store that was once in this barn. I love this property and was sad when it went up for sale because I was afraid some developers would snatch up the property and the beautiful barns and house would disappear. However when Jeff announced he had purchased this property I was totally psyched because I knew it was going to be saved, preserved, and wonderful!

Along with the barn which has the store there will be other things available to do on this property including the house becoming a fabulous Airbnb.

This is the kind of preservation in real time and adaptive reuse that Chester County needs more of! I will note that I first came to know Jeff and his fiancée Janelle, through our mutual friend Meg Veno, proprietress of Life’s Patina at Willowbrook Farm and the soon to be opened Mechantile at the Jenny Lind House in Historic Yellow Springs Village.

I will note that both the Mercantile/Jenny Lind and Jeff’s Sycamore & Stone are both located in West Pikeland Township. West Pikeland is a treasure trove of amazing historic properties. I hope that Township realizes how fortunate and blessed they are that they have people willing to come in and do these amazing adaptive resources that are viable on historic properties.

Jeff’s store is a feast for the eyes and there is all sorts of fun stuff! It has a great Americana country vibe. It’s a lovely space and shoppers feel relaxed in it. It is almost like welcoming someone into a great big farmhouse and not just a hands down super amazing barn. I gravitate to places that are warm and welcoming. And their staff is equally warm and welcoming!

One of the things I liked best are the reproduction hog scraper candlesticks he has available for sale. I collect the actual vintage/antique variety, so these are a real favorite with me! If Jeff Devlin had a wish list for customers mine would be to carry hand dipped taper candles that fit into hog scrapers because that is the right shape for them!

I look forward to this property further coming back to life and it is such a joy to see the work occurring on it every time I drive by. Jeff is a quality craftsman, and such a nice guy so I am glad he found his spot here on this property. My only lament is I don’t have a super old farmhouse for him to help me restore!

Anyway Sycamore & Stone is yet another reason to shop local! Enjoy the photos!

Sycamore & Stone is located at 1251 Conestoga Road, Chester Springs, PA. Right now the hours are WEDNESDAY-FRIDAY 12PM-7PM, SATURDAY 10AM-7PM, SUNDAY 10AM-4PM.

I will note that I have not been compensated in any way, shape, or form to write this post. I’m merely visited the store and I am now a happy customer: I like to shop local and support the businesses of people I know.

#shoplocal #shopsmall #stonehouserevival #schoolhousewoodworking #home

truly, you can’t make this stuff up: the truth is always stranger than fiction with the NOFIMBY neighbors of castlebar lane. nothing like a little pre-easter crucifixion between neighbors, right?

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Whose horse/ponies are those? Are they even in Willistown or just some random image? They don’t live on Castlebar do they? If so, better check the zoning, right?

You literally can’t make this stuff up: The NOFIMBY Neighbors Who Want To Crucify Their Neighbors For Easter?????

Yes, the NOFIMBYs have published themselves a little WIX site called http://www.castlebarlane.com/

Now, I am not accusing any particular neighbor over this website since I don’t know YET who created it, unless any of you do perhaps? Also, there is also a flyer that has been distributed. Physically mailed to residents like one of those tacky campaign glossies.

I know, I know, it is a little crazy. Especially since when you heard recently from these neighbors, it was to say “Oh gosh, oh golly, we don’t want to ruin their lives!” (paraphrasing, but here READ THIS).

I guess they didn’t like my last post when I unpacked a few things thanks to some Right To Know Requests.

(If you think an image is too small, click on it to bring it up on your screen larger)

Let’s talk vilified since those farm hating angels feel put out and/or misunderstood, OK? How about this little website recently developed?

Wildflower Farm is a farm. They grow flowers. Oh my gosh, such a threat to humanity, can you imagine????

The “review” they posted in Wix land was a FRIEND for whom they had a birthday party. NO MONEY changed hands. It was two years ago – and the friend thought she was helping by posting a review.

Next the Friendly Sons thing is a NON-PROFIT Ryan Heenan is part of and is a past president of. That was a private event that anyone could host on their property. The Friendly Sons is an Irish organization which is well-respected and has existed since the 18th century in Philadelphia, so do the neighbors have a prejudice against the Irish I wonder? Could this be a modern spin on “Irish Need Not Apply”???

And the winery license thing has to do with HONEY, as in bees make honey. If you want to make mead, you have to have a permit as far as I understand. Maybe I don’t have that completely right, but that is what that is about. It’s not about having keggers for profit.

The “brochure” was a mock up from years ago when they had not done anything and were exploring what to do with the farm. Some web person put together a mock up of a brochure that was never formally developed or distributed and apparently left it on her website as an example of work product. It wasn’t actually a real thing. Did they explore options? Sure, who doesn’t today with a farm if they want to survive? There are actually plenty of fabulous farms in Chester County you can rent space from, so it makes sense they would look into it, right?

The Mother’s Day event last year was their grand opening. Done with permission from Willistown Township.

And as far as the creek issues go, I have been on their property – NO WETLANDS. They did rebuild a stream and put it back that a prior property owner had done stuff to in order to create a winter skating rink thingy, and why didn’t the neighbors complain about that? And how did they get those photos without trespassing? Here I have photos, that I was invited to take (as in I did not have to trespass to get them) :

They do use the barn for things like family parties. But people are allowed to entertain. They even had Santa Claus for a few friends with little in November, 2020 because Santa experiences were scarce due to COVID-19. Yes, there was a photographer, so the kids had their Santa photos. NOT a public event, just doing something nice with a few friends after a horrible year so kids could have some normalcy at Christmas. How is that a horrible thing? The answer of course it’s not, but I would say the Scrooges of Castlebar Lane probably would say otherwise, yes?

It’s time to take a stand against NOFIMBY people in Chester County And to be clear, these people are not doing anything for the benefit of all in Willistown.

This is only about THEM.


And yes Ryan Heenan and family members are in real estate. Real estate investors. So what? So are lots of people.

Wildflower Farm is this family’s HOME. And they grow freaking flowers.


Would the NOFIMBY neighbors of Castlebar Lane be more comfortable with say an actual developer carving up their ‘hood? Maybe they would like some townhouses or apartments where all are crammed in like lemmings?

And nothing being done on Wildflower Farm goes against state agricultural/farming laws (ACRE law). Local ordinances from what I have been told are supposed to conform to state laws?

acreDownload


I know Willistown people to be BETTER than this. BE better than this. Please contact Willistown Township and politely ask them to stop this madness. Their zoning needs to go along with state law. If it isn’t, they respectfully need to change that. They also need to consider the fact that one of their planning commission members is one of these unpleasant neighbors on Castlebar, and has shown up on stuff about this filed against township, hasn’t he?

Phone: 610-647-5300 (Willistown Township Phone Number)

sslook@willistown.pa.us

wshoemaker@willistown.pa.us

rlange@willistown.pa.us

mperrin@willistown.pa.us

And lest I forget to post photos of it, someone indeed paid for a campaign-like glossy mailer to go out about Wildflower Farm. Nothing like harassing your neighbors because you want the advantages of living with agricultural districts which give regular homeowners perks but not living near actual farms, right? And I have to ask again, do they have a publicist doing these flyers and placements? That would be nice to know so people can avoid giving them business in the future, right? And that mailer requires a permit so who got the permit?

And OMG BUS TOURS? 😛 😛 COME ONE. What do you think they are The Barnes Foundation or maybe Dorney Park or Dutch Wonderland? 😛 😛


Here is a mash-up of little video snippets from when they opened last year. Tell me you think these neighbors are normal in the way they treat the Heenans?

#SaveSmallFarms

I mean dayummmm, it’s almost Good Friday and Easter is Sunday. Way to nail the Heenans to a proverbial cross or try to, right?

You literally can’t make this stuff up: The NOFIMBY Neighbors Who Want To Crucify Their Neighbors For Easter.