Well here we are. 2023 is about to become a memory. 2024 is knocking at our doors.
Time flies.
Life happens while you are making other plans.
Auld lang syne.
This is the year I turn 60. That is almost inconceivable to me. Women aren’t supposed to admit their age. But why? Why can’t we be honest and embrace it?
So am I now old enough to admit I really don’t give a damn about New Year’s Eve parties?
I came across this poem of Jeff Buckley’ today’s. I don’t quite know what to make of it, but here it is:
Like a lot of his music, it’s kind of abstract. But in this disjointed world in which we now live but he will never know, does it fit? Not sure. Like I said not sure what to make of it. (But then again I could never decide if I liked his music or not, although I once knew people who were *obsessed* with it.)
What will 2024 bring us? Will we all be living the fractured fairy tail that is the USA? Probably since we are going into another rather depressing Presidential election cycle. And no one has put the National Grifter in jail. It’s like those who could deal with him are all claiming to be a little bit preggers here.
All we need to ever remember is January 6th, 2021. And if people vote for him again and his greed and political bullshit aren’t dismantled and put away for good, Americans will get what America couldn’t come together and deal with productively. It’s all great if people posture one way or the other all over social media, but if people don’t get out and vote him down?
I predict this will be once again the lesser of two evils election come the fall of 2024. That’s a shitty way to be governed don’t you think?
And Chester County Democratic Committee? Kindly cut the crap and ditch Grandma Charlotte and current leadership early in 2024. If you don’t, it’s not a question of if but when you all will ruin what you worked so hard to achieve.
And Chester County Republican Committee? Quit pandering to extremism groups and saying you aren’t. It’s kind of like gun sale raffle tickets on election day, or very obvious. And background check your candidates, even for school board unless you will love you some more fake “professors”, for example? Or how about ditching the perpetual no-win candidates who seem to run for everything, not do their own campaign work, and drive the campaigns of your few good candidates crazy? You actually had some good candidates who suffered because of your less than stellar candidates.
My ultimate wish for politics? Not whomever gets all of the toys wins, but balance. Our country was founded on balance and a two party system. Once again I will remark how the politics of extremism is ruining quite a bit, even basic interpersonal relationships. I have been saying this for a few years, and oh the criticism I receive. Whatever. I still think I am correct.
Chester County Municipalities in 2024? All I wish for is more “sunshine” and transparency, far less development, and more historic preservation.
Ahh social media, what will you bring us in 2024? In 2023 you bought me a self-branded public figure who decided to complain to the police about this blog, although I did truly nothing except mock a public figure and offer my opinion. And when you self proclaim you are a local celebrity and public figure? I just don’t know. Or the guy with the penchant for writing on campaign signs, and a what else do you call it other than a mail order bride 40 years his junior and a penchant for odd public Tik Tok video things only no one is supposed to ever say anything?
2023 brought us extremist groups in full flower and suburban mothers wearing gas masks and holding dead baby signs, bibles, and book banning lists at school board meetings. And the oracles of extremism they follow? Well there’s the story of the ménages à trois Moms for Liberty Co-Founder in Florida, and closer to home in Bucks County, a dark money supported former GOP candidate for Pennsylvania’s lieutenant governor who was also involved in a political action committee that claimed liberals were “indoctrinating” students is facing charges for and underage drinking party and assaulting a kid so these are their examples of greatness?
As we exit 2023 we can but marvel at so much the past 12 months?
From faux boutique owners that didn’t pay their Main Line bills, to running a century old furniture business into the ground through greed and chicanery, to wondering if tumbleweeds will fit in over at the old Pete’s Produce in Westtown, to living in fear over Danelo Cavalcante at large, to the craziness of Chester County politics (like raffle tickets for guns on election day poll tables) from both sides of the aisle (you can run for office as a Democrat in a primary but only if pre-ordained), it’s amazing we are all still standing isn’t it? And wait we didn’t even get to all of the development did we?
And social media, you’ve been exceptionally special all 2023. Yesterday I read a post by a woman in a social media group that struck me as raw and honest and describing the behavior of people that no one should aspire to and yet so many didn’t get it or wanted to tell her how she should feel:
EDITED: It’s not about new money, old money, or no money at all. The crux of the matter is discrimination, irrespective of one’s financial background. Focusing on creating an environment free from bias and treating everyone with dignity is the essence of this conversation.
So, my husband’s been cruising along in his career, and my business is holding its own too. Life’s comfy, but stepping into those fancy boutiques on the Main Line can throw a curveball.
It’s like I’ve got my own fan club following me around, especially when I just want to try on a pair of shoes. One shoe at a time, the other under lock and key – it’s almost like I’m on a secret mission. And the “Can I help you?” questions never quit, even when I’m broadcasting the “I’m good” vibes.
Supporting local businesses is a vibe I’m all for, but it gets tricky when you feel like you’re a fish out of water. Sometimes, I find myself hitting up big box stores just to dodge the whole vibe.
Here’s the kicker: recently, I’m trying on some clothes, and the salesperson pops the question, “Where are you from?” I say Malvern, and they hit me with a “No, I meant, like, what are you?” It’s moments like these that make you wonder if everyone’s just reading from a different script.
It’s not about expecting red carpet treatment because of success – it’s about wanting a fair shake. Sharing stories like this, maybe we can nudge things toward a more equal and inclusive shopping scene. Ever had one of those moments where you just wanted fair treatment, no strings attached?
I totally get where this woman is coming from. If you have experienced anything like this it is just sort of surreal no matter what the reason. And again, so many of the people who responded didn’t actually even get what she was saying. I got it. And I say that as a middle aged white woman who grew up on the Main Line. When you experience these special people, it leaves a spot. It’s just a terrible feeling before anyone dissects it to anything else.
One experience I had that was unpleasant was an antique/resale store in Wayne. I had been at Penn Medicine in Radnor having undergone a Mohs surgery for squamous cell skin cancer on my cheek. That meant, yes I had a small diagonal bandage on my left cheek. Squamous cell is in between basal cell and melanoma for those who are curious. So I was dressed down, not wearing rags and nice but not flashy jewelry and a nice handbag.
Ever since breast cancer, when I have a successful cancer procedure (and now there have been a few) I get myself a treat. I parked and went into the store. I was the ONLY customer with 3 or 4 sales women behind the desk. I wandered around for at least 20 minutes. All of those women knew I was there. They literally stared at me. I smiled at them. Not one said “hello” or “if we can help, let us know.” Nothing. I saw one thing that interested me, I said “excuse me, can you help me?” None of those women looked up. I left and have never been back.
Another true tale is years ago I worked at a now defunct plant nursery. The owner was a chain smoking, socially ambitious and wincingly unpleasant widow of the original owner. Let’s start with if someone she thought was a single man came into the business and they looked like they had a coin or two, because I was single I would literally get sent to the warehouse so she could have her single daughter wait on them. It was like warped Cinderella. It didn’t bother me, just made me laugh.
But what didn’t make me laugh back then there was the way they often treated this very, very old lady who would drive up in this ancient beast of a station wagon. Her clothes were neat and clean but threadbare. They were miserable to her, almost rude. Condescending. To them she didn’t look the part of the Main Line. She was just a little old lady who still liked flowers and plants sometimes. I liked this old lady named Miss Collins and I didn’t even know who she was or all the great things she had accomplished in her life until one day, many many years later, I read her obituary.
Miss Collins, also known as Margaret Hill Collins was instrumental in getting Fair Housing laws in the suburban Philadelphia area as well as being a birthright Quaker from a very old Philadelphia family. She also worked tirelessly towards race relations. She went to the U.S. Supreme Court and won in 1973. She was from an old Philadelphia and Main Line family that would mean nothing to new settlers of the Main Line today, but her family property is today part of Bryn Mawr College. Swarthmore, Haverford and Bryn Mawr Colleges maintain her papers.
Back to social media. Social media seems to rule too many lives. We are all guilty of spending too much time on it sometimes. As a blogger, I am often caught in the swirling black hearted vortex of it all, usually because someone somewhere has decided I am an evil horrible person who should only regurgitate unicorns farting rainbows. Lordy, that sounds like it would be exhausting, so I opt for just being me. Undoubtedly in 2024 I will continue to be amused by the people who seem so obsessed over what one woman (me) thinks. I am not anything other than an ordinary woman. Might I suggest gardening for what ails them?
2023 has been a year that has been trying to many on personal levels. It seems like all of us experienced loss this year. The cycle of life has it’s ups and downs, it’s all how you muddle through it. Some days it is just that: muddling through and you know what? It’s ok.
I never have pretended to be a perfect person, or to have led a perfect life. I am, at the end of every day, always just myself. I know I am lucky to be able to be just me. I am lucky to love an be loved. I am fortunate in family, friends, and a loving life partner in my husband who was rather late to dinner Saturday evening because at the end of the day he helped a man whose name he didn’t even learn, get his car started so he could get home to his pregnant wife in Massachusetts.
For 2024, I wish people peace. I wish people good health. And I actually wish people love. The ability to love, be loved, and love themselves. I wish for less phony bullshit. And for God’s sake get off of social media once in a while, and learn the actual history of where you call home.
Happy New Year’s Eve and cheers to 2024.
